Funkymonkey Posted June 19, 2009 Posted June 19, 2009 I have had a crush on this one girl, but things haven't exactly worked out too well, we haven't talked about a relationship or anything but I just sense that she and I are only going to stay friends. Now my question is, I have had a really big crush on her, I told her by accident (long story) she knows, I think she liked me a bit after I told her. But now that we are friends will there still be that "feeling" between the both of us when ever we chill. Like now that we talk I always feel like there is some sort of "emotions" in the way I don't know whether that made any sense or not.
WTRanger Posted June 22, 2009 Posted June 22, 2009 Do you like how you feel when you hang out with her knowing that you'll only ever be her friend? How long have the two of you known each other? What do you do when you hang out? How much one on one time do you have? How do you, at this moment, honestly want her to fit into your life?
Author Funkymonkey Posted June 22, 2009 Author Posted June 22, 2009 Do you like how you feel when you hang out with her knowing that you'll only ever be her friend? How long have the two of you known each other? What do you do when you hang out? How much one on one time do you have? How do you, at this moment, honestly want her to fit into your life? The problem is I don't know what I want from this either. I would love to have a relationship with her and at the same time, I can't see it happening if she isn't going to show me that she feels the same way for me. We've known each other for almost 5 months now, we usually do nothing other than enjoy each others company like watch a movie at my place or even go for walks. Whenever we hang out outside of work it's always one on one.
WTRanger Posted June 23, 2009 Posted June 23, 2009 First things first, you need to figure out where you want to see her in your life. If you want to see her in a relationship, then just turn up the pressure and go for it. You'll survive whatever happens. Just keep reminding yourself of that. It sounds like what you want most is to be much more than friends with this girl, so go for it. Obviously right now you aren't really happy. Sure you're happy when the two of you are hanging out, but when you are alone all she does is dominate your thoughts and you long for that one shot at kissing her. So just f'n do it! If you want to stay friends, then just keep doing what you are doing. But if you even have one shred of feelings for this girl, it'll be one long road ahead of you. If she just wants to be friends that's fine. But if you don't want that, then it'll be miserable for you and for her. What has she shown you? What signs have you picked up on? There has to be something you are picking up on when the two of you hang out that is signaling she might just want a friendship.
carhill Posted June 23, 2009 Posted June 23, 2009 OP, if you think of her when she's not around and, when she is, you want to grab her and kiss her, IMO, and I speak from long experience here, it's better to resolve those feelings and thoughts solo before attempting any sort of platonic friendship with her. If such is not possible (resolving the feelings), then I'd make her aware and say your goodbyes. An unbalanced friendship is a recipe for a lifetime of pain and, unlike in a true friendship, the glue in your case would be your attraction to her. That's unhealthy glue. Talk with her straight-up about it. Accept the results. Is this the girl from this post? http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t170604/
Author Funkymonkey Posted June 23, 2009 Author Posted June 23, 2009 OP, if you think of her when she's not around and, when she is, you want to grab her and kiss her, IMO, and I speak from long experience here, it's better to resolve those feelings and thoughts solo before attempting any sort of platonic friendship with her. If such is not possible (resolving the feelings), then I'd make her aware and say your goodbyes. An unbalanced friendship is a recipe for a lifetime of pain and, unlike in a true friendship, the glue in your case would be your attraction to her. That's unhealthy glue. Talk with her straight-up about it. Accept the results. Is this the girl from this post? http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t170604/ See I can't do that. And Back to WTRANGERS post. I don't pick up any signals that she just wants to be friends I know it. Simply for the fact that it has been 5 months and from the first bit of that we never made much progress and the "romantic" side of things just died down so I'm pretty damn sure that she only sees me as a friend now. I never made a move...it never really felt right. She knew I liked her a lot at one point, she started reciprocating the feelings, but I never took the chance, so that was pretty much it. She finds us friends but even that it feels a bit awkward between the both of us whenever we chill. What's causing that awkwardness?? And Carhill no that's not the girl from the post.
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