Valedico Posted June 18, 2009 Posted June 18, 2009 Hey there Just a thought my ex ex just friend requested me on FB after a year of no contact. Wish it it was my recent ex tho ;-) When we were 2gether i really loved her so much she was amazing BEAUTIFUL, SEXY, stylish, wealthy a body to die for with the most seductive eyes i have ever seen, everything a man could want, and trust me PLENTY of guys wanted her but when she got drunk she got angry and had a flarring temper she would get up set over the smallest issue scream at me jump in her car and leave!! Then the next day she would apologise profusely i would take her back and we would be in heaven untill she drank again and went ballistic one night! She also confessed to cheating then dumped me i begged for her back i was so whipped by this woman she was like something out of a movie! She was an ANGEL when she was sober but a devil when she got drunk, she would spoil me rotten but sometimes she would switch from loveable to cold in the blink of an eye (when not drinking) this happened about 3 times. I left her, i just couldnt deal with it anymore i told her she needs to see a shrink which she did it turned out she had a borderline personality she never knew it and did everything in her power to fix herself went to therapy stopped drinking and begged for me back for months but i just couldnt take her back i was scared she would hurt me again. I cut her out of my life for good. So my qeustion is would you run for the hills or give an ex like this a second chance? When they genuinly made an effort to fix themselves I always wondered what would have happened if i took her back.
LisaUk Posted June 18, 2009 Posted June 18, 2009 If she has sought therapy then give her a second chance. Anyone can do things when it comes easily, the ones worth having are those who do things when it's hard! She's sorted herself out even though it must have been really hard for her, if you still have feelings give it a try, you have nothing to lose and everything to gain.
IfWishesWereHorses Posted June 18, 2009 Posted June 18, 2009 No way would I knowing get involved with someone with BPD even if they were in therapy. Did she just friend request you or did she mention getting back together???
Author Valedico Posted June 18, 2009 Author Posted June 18, 2009 I havent accepted her friend request yet, dont know if i should go down that road again, i still have a soft spot for her tho...weird how you can still love someone even when they crushed your heart, she hurt me pritty bad thats an understatement she destroyed me. When something seems to good to be true it normally is. She was fine when she didnt drink except for the ocassional cold mood swings. Last time i heard anything about her was thru a mutual friend apparently she has changed quite alot! I do believe in second chances i feel sorry for her she didnt choose to be a BDP she could never understand why she was so tempermental i put up with alot of her ****, the last time she freaked out scared the **** out of me...she did love me a helluva lot, when she cheated and dumped me my uncle had just died the previous day...i was so blindly in love with her back then, now it just makes me angry about what she did. She wrote me a long email to appologise, she hated herself for a while it must be terrible to do those things and then not understand why you did it..but i know it can be treated.
PandaStillLovesBunny Posted June 26, 2009 Posted June 26, 2009 I'm going to have to agree with IfWishesWereHorses. I was involved with a BPD who was in therapy, and let me tell you - it rarely helps them. They might get over their threats of suicide for a while, only to cheat on you as some sort of substitute. You don't have to cut her out completely, but you have to know that she rarely means what she says.
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