Taucher Posted June 17, 2009 Posted June 17, 2009 Hello fellow dumpees. I will explain my heading. My GF left me. She walked out on what was, in mine and everyone else's eyes, a perfectly brilliant relationship. She had ouside issues and could not cope, that is my theory. Anyway, imagine the pressure of being the dumper. Imagine the DOUBT and the GUILT. There MUST be loads of doubt. Imagine having to wonder for Months, years or maybe FOREVER whether you did the right thing. Fellow dumped, when we move on from these relationships, we will move forward to better thing. We will have acceptance and new knowledge of ourselves which will enable us to have BETTER relationships. No looking back. That's the theory anyway. Dumping is high pressure stakes innit? I'm glad I have my integrity. T
clv0116 Posted June 17, 2009 Posted June 17, 2009 Sorry, no. She probably had plenty of other options on hooks and likely had a firm grip on a new branch before she let go of you. I humbly suggest you stop pining around and act like a man. Go out and hunt.
Exit Posted June 17, 2009 Posted June 17, 2009 It may be true it may not. There are girls out there who really CAN walk away and not feel an ounce of guilt. And there are the ones who actually have a heart and will have a hard time dealing with their decision. It really depends on how easy you make their decision for them. If you treated them like a total angel and they ditch you, they will have doubts. If you made them miserable, they ain't lookin back.
Cora Posted June 17, 2009 Posted June 17, 2009 Sorry, no. She probably had plenty of other options on hooks and likely had a firm grip on a new branch before she let go of you. I humbly suggest you stop pining around and act like a man. Go out and hunt. Wow, Isn't that a bit harsh?
Exit Posted June 17, 2009 Posted June 17, 2009 Wow, Isn't that a bit harsh? Some people prefer the harsh medicine of reality. I try to tread somewhere in the middle, as in my reply. There are people who can move on without regrets, and others who will have their doubts. Like anything in life, there is no one answer.
boogieboy Posted June 17, 2009 Posted June 17, 2009 Wow, Isn't that a bit harsh? I dont believe so, I think hes right. Pretty much allof the stories here are of dumpers who had left someone for someone. They dont feel guilt or doubt. They already moved on. I dont feel sorry for them. Screw em.
wow123 Posted June 17, 2009 Posted June 17, 2009 I think its different case by case. Mine left for someone else but... She wasn't eating for a week or two, lost alot of weight and was crying. Guess it was the guilt?
Cora Posted June 17, 2009 Posted June 17, 2009 Some people prefer the harsh medicine of reality. I try to tread somewhere in the middle, as in my reply. There are people who can move on without regrets, and others who will have their doubts. Like anything in life, there is no one answer. I agree.....it may be true and it may not. I guess I'm just way too sensitive. LOL
boogieboy Posted June 17, 2009 Posted June 17, 2009 There are people who can move on without regrets, and others who will have their doubts. Like anything in life, there is no one answer. Unfortunately when they have doubts about being with you, its already going down hill, whether they work at it or not.
Author Taucher Posted June 17, 2009 Author Posted June 17, 2009 I think I have been misunderstood slightly. I dont consider myself to be 'pining'. I am very positive about the future, whether she is in it or not. I cant turn my feelings off and there are enough issues (for her - self harm, eating disorder) for me to 1) want to be there for her...to an extent and 2) to see gray areas in our relationship breakdown. However, to say that I am pining and then advocate going out to hunt is a bit hypocritical. If there is one mistake I have made since she left, it is having a girl back to my flat. Waking up the next morning with someone strange in the bed was the worst thing I could have done. T
contax Posted June 18, 2009 Posted June 18, 2009 Taucher, I agree with you and for keeoping your integrity. I still have mine. I see what someone said about go out and "hunt" for them. I'm not about that. I'm just into making new friends for now. I am so proud and happy I have a clean conscience!
CaliGuy Posted June 18, 2009 Posted June 18, 2009 Hello fellow dumpees. I will explain my heading. My GF left me. She walked out on what was, in mine and everyone else's eyes, a perfectly brilliant relationship. She had ouside issues and could not cope, that is my theory. Anyway, imagine the pressure of being the dumper. Imagine the DOUBT and the GUILT. There MUST be loads of doubt. Imagine having to wonder for Months, years or maybe FOREVER whether you did the right thing. Fellow dumped, when we move on from these relationships, we will move forward to better thing. We will have acceptance and new knowledge of ourselves which will enable us to have BETTER relationships. No looking back. That's the theory anyway. Dumping is high pressure stakes innit? I'm glad I have my integrity. T Meh, I have exs (multiple) that check my web site out quite often. I believe they have regrets but not enough to make them seriously doubt their decision or they'd be with us. I agree though, no looking back. Live your life, have fun and the RIGHT one will show up and we only need be ourselves.
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