caz83 Posted June 16, 2009 Posted June 16, 2009 Why is it so hard to start NC? I keep thinking right, today is the day I will start but then I always give in and think, its ok Ill start tomorrow...then the next day 'its ok I'll start tomorrow'. Im so weak willed. Its like planning to start a diet! On the day I originally planned to start NC it was 4 weeks untill the day he graduates university so I said to myself I'll do NC for the 4 weeks then see if I want to text him on his graduation.....its now 1.5 weeks untill his graduation and I still havnt started NC. Why cant I do it?!? Im so frustrated with myself. But him texting me back doesnt make it any easier.
Exit Posted June 16, 2009 Posted June 16, 2009 Can't worry about the past, all you can do is look at the opportunity in front of you. You can do it for the last 1.5 weeks, or continue to mess it up. Or just keep talking to him and settle as being friends or something.
BCCA Posted June 16, 2009 Posted June 16, 2009 You just have to realize that staying in contact with him has gotten you absolutely nowhere. Do you feel like youre any closer today to getting back with him than you were 3 weeks ago? Of course not, youre just pulling the knife out of your heart slowly. Since talking to him clearly isnt getting you anywhere, your only choices are to realize this and start NC immediately, or give up being happy ever again. Erase his number from your phone, remove him from myspace/FB, get rid of his email,etc., and stop contacting him. He's like an addiction for you, and you cant give it up because you dont want to face the facts. Its rough, we've all been there, but NC is the first step to recovery.
redy2 Posted June 16, 2009 Posted June 16, 2009 i was thinking the same thing as you for like the past 3 weeks. and id give in and txt or she would txt. only ofcourse when she needed something and then have time to see me for like 5 minutes. then last fri when she was txting me. i was like are you with me or not? and after her insulting me and trying to get me to argue. which i dont ever do with anyone. she got so mad she said she made up her mind to change her number etc etc. so i didnt answer back and going on day 4 of nc. i tell myself she has changed her number and wouldnt get my txt if i sent one. so that has helped me. only problem is i know at some point she will contact me because she is pregnant. so its like an anvil hanging over my head. but nc gets easier as the days go on. you have good ones and bad ones.
Author caz83 Posted June 16, 2009 Author Posted June 16, 2009 Well I know that we will have to speak soon because in August the contract on our apartment (where I am still living) is up, so I will be moving out to move back in with my parents. So he will have to come round so we can sort out all out stuff and decide what we are going to do with out furniture etc and pretty much say goodbye because then Ill be moving to a different city. And so I sometimes feel like what is the point in cutting contact and trying to get over it when I know I have that day coming up which will just be horrible and like breaking up all over again.
Exit Posted June 16, 2009 Posted June 16, 2009 If that is the excuse you are using to maintain contact then just get it over with sooner than later. Just because you aren't moving out until August doesn't mean he can't come and get his things now. You will find as time goes on it just because a bigger and bigger reason to keep thinking about him. My ex kept some of my stuff after leaving me and I kept thinking about it every day, thinking it meant we had a reason to see each other in the future and try talking again, eventually I went and got most of it back, and she is supposed to drop off the rest sometime soon.
Author caz83 Posted June 16, 2009 Author Posted June 16, 2009 He already has all of his stuff, its the big things like furniture, sofa's, bed, bookcases etc that we bought together that we cant do anything about yet because I am still living here and using it. But when the contract is up we have to clear the whole place.
BCCA Posted June 16, 2009 Posted June 16, 2009 He already has all of his stuff, its the big things like furniture, sofa's, bed, bookcases etc that we bought together that we cant do anything about yet because I am still living here and using it. But when the contract is up we have to clear the whole place. As far as Im concerned, that stuff is now all yours. My ex and I bought everything in our apartment, and when she left me, I told her to take what she wanted. Anything she left behind is now 100% mine. At most, I would send him a text that unless he gets everything he wants out of there within a week, youre either keeping it or throwing it away. Thats the way it has to be. Nothing is going to change in August, youre just delaying the inevitable.
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