Passionate Lover Posted June 16, 2009 Posted June 16, 2009 Well i have been single for nearly 2 years and my last relationship basically ruined most of my life and i gave up on women but out of the blue i just met this girl and i thought for once i won't just let it pass. I met her around 40 miles from where i live and it turns out she lives 2 minutes away from my house, so i decided to pursue this opportunity and to my shock she really liked me. We've been dating for over 2 weeks now and she says im her everything and says she is lucky to have me, and of course i tell her the same, i tell her everyday she's amazing, beautiful and very special =], It's just the way i am. I'm getting on REALLY well with her family, they really like me. The question is shall i tell her i love her and of course i do love her, i definitely do feel something deeper than just attraction at this point and i never thought i'd have this feeling again so soon in a relationship but the worst thing to do right now would be to push her away by saying those scary words, i want to but i also don't want to lose this very special girl. My life recently has came from being totally crap to pretty immense, i have 2 great jobs, my car, loads of friends and most of all this amazing girl. If this also helps you to help me. We have been having sex and Ive slept with her numerous nights (not sex) just because she has difficulty sleeping so i stay with her and neither of us get much sleep but at least she isn't crying. Basically things are going REALLY REALLY REALLY well. Thank you for reading, any advice would be great
TaraMaiden Posted June 16, 2009 Posted June 16, 2009 I'd tell her, certainly. But piuck the most romantic moment you can, or tell her in a card.... with flowers. I'm sure it will be a wonderful moment.
Bejita463 Posted June 16, 2009 Posted June 16, 2009 she has difficulty sleeping so i stay with her and neither of us get much sleep but at least she isn't crying. Why would she be crying? Sorry, that just stuck out to me. For the rest... you feel what you feel, but 2 weeks might be pushing it a little. She might not think you are being entirely sincere, so soon. I'd advise you be certain you DO love her before you go off saying it at this point. I mean certain with your head, not certain with your head, if you catch my meaning.
Author Passionate Lover Posted June 16, 2009 Author Posted June 16, 2009 Why would she be crying? Sorry, that just stuck out to me. For the rest... you feel what you feel, but 2 weeks might be pushing it a little. She might not think you are being entirely sincere, so soon. I'd advise you be certain you DO love her before you go off saying it at this point. I mean certain with your head, not certain with your head, if you catch my meaning. Sorry i didn't fully explain that she has trouble sleeping because she is a bit of a hypochondriac and worry's about a lot of things before she goes to sleep and her nan and gran dad the 2 closest people in her life died in the last year and she's still finding it hard to cope with the loss and finds it hard to sleep. There is times im sure she wants to say it to me but doesn't, she looks right into my eyes and just says my name and it's like she is hinting to something but she never says anything after she says my name. I find it hard to get time alone with her, she has a best friend who is ALWAYS there. I understand 2 weeks is cutting it abit close and i think i will wait till the time is right, maybe take her out and tell her in the meanwhile ill decide the most romantic way of saying it and showing it
Bejita463 Posted June 16, 2009 Posted June 16, 2009 Sorry i didn't fully explain that she has trouble sleeping because she is a bit of a hypochondriac and worry's about a lot of things before she goes to sleep and her nan and gran dad the 2 closest people in her life died in the last year and she's still finding it hard to cope with the loss and finds it hard to sleep. Most unfortunate. I am sorry to hear about that. There is times im sure she wants to say it to me but doesn't, she looks right into my eyes and just says my name and it's like she is hinting to something but she never says anything after she says my name. I find it hard to get time alone with her, she has a best friend who is ALWAYS there. I understand 2 weeks is cutting it abit close and i think i will wait till the time is right, maybe take her out and tell her in the meanwhile ill decide the most romantic way of saying it and showing it It seems reasonable to point out I am a guy that prefers actions to words, so I am a bit more reserved about SAYING things than may be ordinary. Just for your information, when you decide how applicable my opinion may be as it pertains to your situation.
prettybaby Posted June 16, 2009 Posted June 16, 2009 We've been dating for over 2 weeks now This is all I needed to read. No. Don't tell her yet.
JustLooking123 Posted June 16, 2009 Posted June 16, 2009 Tell your you like her, care about her, hope you are with her for a long time, etc. DO NOT tell her you love her. You cannot love someone after 2 weeks.
northstar1 Posted June 16, 2009 Posted June 16, 2009 Well i have been single for nearly 2 years and my last relationship basically ruined most of my life and i gave up on women but out of the blue i just met this girl and i thought for once i won't just let it pass. I met her around 40 miles from where i live and it turns out she lives 2 minutes away from my house, so i decided to pursue this opportunity and to my shock she really liked me. We've been dating for over 2 weeks now and she says im her everything and says she is lucky to have me, and of course i tell her the same, i tell her everyday she's amazing, beautiful and very special =], It's just the way i am. I'm getting on REALLY well with her family, they really like me. The question is shall i tell her i love her and of course i do love her, i definitely do feel something deeper than just attraction at this point and i never thought i'd have this feeling again so soon in a relationship but the worst thing to do right now would be to push her away by saying those scary words, i want to but i also don't want to lose this very special girl. My life recently has came from being totally crap to pretty immense, i have 2 great jobs, my car, loads of friends and most of all this amazing girl. If this also helps you to help me. We have been having sex and Ive slept with her numerous nights (not sex) just because she has difficulty sleeping so i stay with her and neither of us get much sleep but at least she isn't crying. Basically things are going REALLY REALLY REALLY well. Thank you for reading, any advice would be great Congrats on meeting someone you are really enthralled by. I think, after only 2 weeks, you are feeling the joy and happiness that often happens when we click with someone special so fast. I'm not saying you won't love her, but 2 weeks is pretty early to truly be in love with someone. Give it some time, and in the meantime just enjoy things.
TaraMaiden Posted June 16, 2009 Posted June 16, 2009 You cannot love someone after 2 weeks. I disagree. I knew after the first day I loved my guy, and he tells me he did too. Really. It was that quick. I just knew, and so did he. It felt way different to other relationships, too..... That's 4 years ago and counting..... (But I do take your point, in that it's not always a dead cert..... )
shadowplay Posted June 17, 2009 Posted June 17, 2009 I would wait. The bottomline is you can't really love somebody on more than a superficial level after two weeks. What you're experiencing is the early stages of infatuation. You're just getting to know her! "Love" is a strong word, and people often use it too casually. Wait at least another month.
shadowplay Posted June 17, 2009 Posted June 17, 2009 I disagree. I knew after the first day I loved my guy, and he tells me he did too. Really. It was that quick. I just knew, and so did he. It felt way different to other relationships, too..... That's 4 years ago and counting..... (But I do take your point, in that it's not always a dead cert..... ) It's easy to call something "love at first sight" when those early feelings of infatuation eventually turn into actual love. If it doesn't work out, that same rush would seem meaningless in retrospect. But I believe that in both cases it's infatuation.
DarkestDreams Posted June 17, 2009 Posted June 17, 2009 Give it a bit more time. You can tell her you adore her instead.
Meaplus3 Posted June 17, 2009 Posted June 17, 2009 You know I'm going to tell you here to go with what you feel in your heart. But, really think it through with your head first. Best of luck. Mea:)
BobSacamento Posted June 17, 2009 Posted June 17, 2009 "Are you confident in the 'I love you' return?" Might I add that perhaps the ladies of LS should give us their reaction - a guy dating you 2 weeks drops the "I love you" bomb. What would you do? What would you think?
cyril's fan Posted June 17, 2009 Posted June 17, 2009 "Are you confident in the 'I love you' return?" Might I add that perhaps the ladies of LS should give us their reaction - a guy dating you 2 weeks drops the "I love you" bomb. What would you do? What would you think? I'd advise that OP, you tell her if you're confident that she feels the same way. Personally if I feel the same way about the guy I'm going out with for two weeks, I wouldn't be put off or think of him as coming on too strongly. If I don't feel the same way but like him enough to want to know him more before deciding, I'd be taken aback, see him as coming on too strongly and may want to back off a little. I'm sorry I don't have more constructive advise as to whether you should or shouldn't tell her but it's up to you to gauge her interest level from the two weeks that you've been together.
proton Posted June 17, 2009 Posted June 17, 2009 We've been dating for over 2 weeks now ..... The question is shall i tell her i love her and of course i do love her No. I thought I had the same thing... until I did exactly what you're thinking of doing, in a VERY similar emotional state (and similar circumstances)... At about the same time even. You know what I got? A cold shiver... silence. It makes me shudder thinking about it. No, if you want to heighten your chances of staying with her.
butcher's hook Posted June 17, 2009 Posted June 17, 2009 No, hold off, two weeks is just too soon. I would find it insincere if someone said that to me, they cannot possibly know enough about me in a few weeks to feel so strongly, I would prefer they said it when they are certain I am who they think I am. People who jump into things so quickly have no time to digest and process what they are doing. You know what you feel is real and if it is true and sincere you feel the same in one month or two months down the line and in fact it will even be stronger then share it at that time. Expressing love is important, and you should never hold back from telling someone you love them if you do but two weeks is just too soon to be making such a bold statement which you cannot take back once you put it out there. Tell her you adore her, look her in the eyes and tell her you really like her, these are all good predecessors to the big bang of all expressions! Once you say ILY there is no turning back, you had better mean it with all your heart. Be patient a build up is so much nicer and it is much more sincere.
samspade Posted June 17, 2009 Posted June 17, 2009 Two weeks?? F that. You won't know a person well enough to love him/her until at least six months. That's when the phoniness, if there is any, wears off and you begin to see the real personality underneath. It's also when the real warning signs creep out. Ironically, most people are two "swept away" to let this affect their judgment and wind up putting up with a lot more b.s than they should. That's not to say your lady has a facade, but if she does, you won't know it after two weeks. Get a grip, man. You're infatuated, you're not in love. Wait until you know her better, far better.
amymarieca Posted June 18, 2009 Posted June 18, 2009 If I was dating a guy for 2 weeks and he said that, I would see it as a red flag to be honest. Even if we had great chemistry, there would still be something very strange about it. I agree that you can fall for some people faster than others, but love is a very strong emotion that takes time to develop. You don't even really know this girl. I have had pairs of pantyhose longer than your relationship! I say wait at least 6 months. After a while, her true colours will come out (not saying they are bad) and then you will really know how you feel. Both of you are in a stage of the relationship where you are trying to be on your best behaviour. Wait until you get in a fight, or see her at one of her "not-so-pretty" moments. Sometimes those moments can define the dynamic of a relationship.
Author Passionate Lover Posted June 20, 2009 Author Posted June 20, 2009 I have decided to wait till the end of the month when we have been dating for over 4 weeks and i've have decided to do it by buying her 20 roses, Fancie chocolates and a large teddy with the words i love you on it and on the card with the flowers i will write, I love you (Her name) I know this will probably come as a shock but we have grown so close these past 4 weeks it's hard not to love you when you make me so happy, it's ok if you don't feel the same way i just wanted to tell you.
DarkestDreams Posted June 20, 2009 Posted June 20, 2009 I have decided to wait till the end of the month when we have been dating for over 4 weeks and i've have decided to do it by buying her 20 roses, Fancie chocolates and a large teddy with the words i love you on it and on the card with the flowers i will write, I love you (Her name) I know this will probably come as a shock but we have grown so close these past 4 weeks it's hard not to love you when you make me so happy, it's ok if you don't feel the same way i just wanted to tell you. It's good that you decided to wait. If she's a girlie girl type, she'll appreciate the romantic gesture. However, I would advice you not to write the last sentence, it makes you come across as a bit desperate and you're preemptively giving her a way out.
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