KillerFish Posted June 12, 2009 Posted June 12, 2009 I am 25 years old that just recently got into the dating world. I have no problems meeting girls and dating them. My problem is getting intimate with them aka first kiss, I usually just chicken out and keep having dates without physical contact until they get tired\frustrated and we stop dating. If I am drunk I am a bit more "courageous" but it's still a big step for me. Now before anyone asks, I love all about women, I am not confused, I just freeze in those "ideal" times... I am tired of losing great girls because of this, any tips you guys could give me to try to go over this ?
chimpy Posted June 16, 2009 Posted June 16, 2009 I am a bit confused. Is it that you don't know when it's right to make a move, or you know when you should make a move but you don't? It sounds like the latter but if not let me know and I can still you help out I think a mutual bond and desire to be intimate on any level is "known" like a sixth sense. With that being said, I think you should perhaps build up or give off basic affectionate hints. My first kiss was only a few weeks ago and I remember that after sensing that we both desired to have some physical contact going, we just started getting closer in distance while we were shopping in a supermarket. We started walking with shoulder contact and we would touch each other to add emphasis to what we said (ex. a happy moment I patted her on the back). By the time we got back to my place we both laid down on the bed to relax and just chat, and it went from there. I am just trying to get at that basically, you should build up to it. Don't go straight for the kiss unless you are REALLY sensing something. I am very shy but this "build up" method really made me feel more comfortable because you test the waters basically--I think it will work for you too. If she steps away when you reach out to pat her on the back, that's a sign she isn't ready. But if not, then you know you have it cooking = confidence!! Then you just build up from there. Keep adding physical contact to show emotion. Being silly is a great way to build that contact. For example, maybe as you guys are just walking and shooting the breeze lightly bump her shoulder and say you're just making sure she is awake, or something dorky like that. Or lightly grab her hand, lift it up, and release, just to be silly--like a father does to a son. I think this build up method will work better than cramming the pressure of to kiss/not to kiss into one final moment.
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