butcher's hook Posted June 16, 2009 Posted June 16, 2009 He's your best friend and that's all he will ever be. He told you that right from the get-go and he meant it. Nothing has changed in him and you will only be disappointed further down the line. 2 Rules to live by: 1. Always pick a man who loves you just a little bit more than you do him. 2. If a man tells you he can't see himself falling in love with you, listen to him. He means it. It won't change. Sometimes guys who start off like this do end up falling in love but it is rare. Given what you said about what he did with the actor girl in your play, nothing has changed for him. You are still just his friend. The best thing you could do is cut him out of your life completely if you want to know exactly where he stands. That will help him figure out what you really mean to him and it will help you see what is really going on in his head and heart.
torranceshipman Posted June 16, 2009 Posted June 16, 2009 He's a jerk, and you've turned into a doormat to keep him. The way he treated you with regard to flirting with the other girl was HORRIBLE. Now he basically has asked you to be monogamous (his girl) whilst he goes out and does whatever he wants, and you've talked yourself into somehow thinking that this is ok by you. I'm guessing that you have very low self esteem and he's probably made it 10 times worse by now (see how he treats you like garbage but you leap to his defence and put him on a pedestal). This guy is selfish and a complete douchebag.
lizzylizliz Posted June 17, 2009 Posted June 17, 2009 I agree with Torranceshipman (sp?). You say what you did about sex...but the way you reacted to him flirting implies that you'd actually be pretty devastated if he slept with her...or anyone else. This just sounds like a convenience relationship, a business partnership and friendship which lacks any real spark to make a 'special' relationship together, as conventional ones do. I really feel for you, but it seems like you're wasting your time. Why stick around if he don't, and won't love you in the way you want to be loved? And why can't he be your 'boy'? My o/h is my guy, and I'm his girlie, and everytime he calls me his girlfriend, it make me smile inside. It seems sad that you're doing this to yourself, especially when there's so many other loving and giving men out there. Personally, I think he knows he's got it made with you, and is sticking around until the next best thing....but thats just my opinion. Good luck! xxx
Author kirikat Posted August 27, 2009 Author Posted August 27, 2009 Well, a couple of months have passed since I posted this. A week ago, a miracle occured. He was spending the weekend at his parents vacation home - and we were chatting. He said "I've been thinking - I haven't taken this relationship seriously enough, and I need to take my responsibilities towards you far more seriously" "Why?" said I. "Because I love you" quoth he. Since he has returned, it has been a whole new ballgame. If I am not around, he looks for me. If he wakes in the night and I have rolled over, he reaches for me. Before he falls asleep, he calls me his lovely girl, or tells me he loves me.... Nothing has changed. Everything has changed. And men say women are confusing. Sheesh.
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