sassyash Posted June 11, 2009 Posted June 11, 2009 Thank you to whoever reads this. Its a little long but i need to clear things up so you understand, but I really need advice I was seeing this guy for about 3 months. We weren't exclusive just together, as we called it. We hung out a lot and I knew he was into me. He would text me every day and ask when were gonna hang out again. Well about a month ago, it ended on a bad note. He really hurt me and I can't even describe how i felt, and still to this day. I thought everything was good and he was into me, but i guess he was just playing games with me. I kind of ended it first, because I knew something was up. Towards the end, he would always ask when were going to hang out next and i would tell him whenever he's free and he would say oh ok this friday works, and friday would come and he would make an excuse up like, he really didn't care. My phone was dead on this weekend, and he e-mailed me after not talking to me for 2 days and asked how i was, and i told him "i was done playing games". I liked him so much, but deep down i needed to tell him cuz i felt like I was getting led on. his response was "ok i wasnt ready for a relationship anyways but it was fun gettn to know you cya around." The next day he emailed me again saying "if you ever need someone to talk to call me"...Then I told him how i felt... which i think scared him off. But i was comfortable telling him since it was awhile of seeing each other. In a message I told him I really liked him and if he ever thought I wasn't into him I was, I just didn't want to be annoying and text him 24/7. We kept emailing back and forth and he told me it "wasn't that easy for him to get over me since he still thought of me, but we'll just have to let it go". Because of that message, I thought there was still some hope since he "still thought about me"...so i told him i wanted to talk about it in person, and he said "what do you want? you told me you have to get over me now you want to talk about it, you're the one that ended it first". And then i told him i was just as confused as him. So he finally agreed and said he would come over. I really think the message freaked him out a bit because he didn't know i felt so strongly about him I was thinking he would come over to work things out. The first thing when he came over he says "so how would this relationship thing work out?" And then after he started telling me he was over me, which makes no sense to me because how do you go from talking about a relationship and then telling the person you're over them? And then a couple days before that he was just emailing me telling me he still thinks about me... and on top of that he was drunk in person which really made me upset cuz that hurt me even more. I told him i wanted to start over and he told me when i get a phone back to call or text him and we can. And then he told me to call him if i ever need someone to talk to, which he was obviously just saying that to be nice. I told him regardless i still want to be friends just to be mature about the situation, and he said ya we'll "keep in touch", and even if i meet a new guy he still wants to keep in touch...which i doubt will happen. He even asked me if i was mad because i looked kinda upset, and I told him "no im just disappointed cuz i thought we had something more." I haven't contacted him for a month, even though he told me to call him or text him when i get a phone back. I can't get over him. My head is telling me to stop thinking about him and just move on, but my heart is telling me different. Its really pathetic how I try to keep holding on to something that's never coming back I have been trying SO hard to forget about him. It just hurts:lmao: I have been rejected before, but not this bad. I really regret telling him how I felt because I think that's what scared him away. He's only 19 and im 21. Why do guys just run away from a girl when they were interested in them in the first place? I don't even want to call him or anything to "start over" because i know he was just saying that we could, to be nice about it. I even asked him once if he could see us being more than just friends and he said yes. Sometimes I still cry out about it, thinking about what "could've been" . It feels like he just took my heart and stomped on it, and he doesn't even give a crap. I hope someday he realizes what he's missing out on. i just want to kick myself for falling for him when he obviously didn't feel the same way. I keep beating myself up over this about 24/7 asking myself what I did wrong and what could have prevented it. Does anyone think i should text him or call him to start over? It sure sounded like he was just saying that to be nice about it. I don't want to come off as lonely and desperate so I haven't contacted him at all, and its already been a month. I have a feeling he will contact me later down the road , and I don't even know if I should answer him. Any advice?
wow123 Posted June 11, 2009 Posted June 11, 2009 There could be a few reasons why he ran if even if he really liked you. I'm older now but I remember when I was 19 I would do this because... A. I thought I was too young to have a girlfriend. B. I recently got out of a relationship and feared getting back into one especially if I really liked the girl. Dumb but true.
Author sassyash Posted June 11, 2009 Author Posted June 11, 2009 i dont believe he is young, cuz he told me he had a gf before hand.
BearPower Posted June 11, 2009 Posted June 11, 2009 To be honest with you, if you guys are playing games this early on in the 'relationship' I dont think it is going anywhere. He is young, just because he has had a GF before, doesnt make him mature. Hell, I had loads of relationships, my recent 5yr engaged to be married just ending, and Im STILL imiture, I have alot to learn about how to treat people and how I myself deserve to be treated. He is young, I think you should take a step back and try to look at your situation as a whole.....what do you see?
wow123 Posted June 11, 2009 Posted June 11, 2009 Him showing up to talk to you about a relationship drunk shows his immaturity.
Author sassyash Posted June 12, 2009 Author Posted June 12, 2009 an immature little boy that needs to grow up lol To be honest with you, if you guys are playing games this early on in the 'relationship' I dont think it is going anywhere. He is young, just because he has had a GF before, doesnt make him mature. Hell, I had loads of relationships, my recent 5yr engaged to be married just ending, and Im STILL imiture, I have alot to learn about how to treat people and how I myself deserve to be treated. He is young, I think you should take a step back and try to look at your situation as a whole.....what do you see?
Author sassyash Posted June 12, 2009 Author Posted June 12, 2009 oh i know. when he was talking to me about it, he turns to me and says "you are really shy" ...(cuz i was being a little quiet since it was awkward)...and im like "ya i know i hate it"...which i found strange him telling me that because he knew i was a quiet girl, since we had been seeing each other for like 3 months. He said it like it was a bad thing and made me feel more put down I just wish i would have said "you know im not the immature one here that has to be drunk to talk about this". I didn't expect him to show up at 1 in the morning drunk to talk about it. Him showing up to talk to you about a relationship drunk shows his immaturity.
TheBigCow Posted June 12, 2009 Posted June 12, 2009 Okay sassyash you are doing the right thing not contacting him and if he contacts you no you should not reply. This guy has ALOT of growing up to do before he deserves someone like you. I know its hard to stop thinking about him now but in time he will mean nothing to you. I know you're feeling bad now but you should try and hang out with friends and even meet some new people (doesn't have to be boys). It will get better and you deserve much better than this guy
Author sassyash Posted June 12, 2009 Author Posted June 12, 2009 I agree Part of me really wants to respond to him since i liked him so much, but then again he doesn't deserve it. I just don't understand how a guy can lead a girl on and not think anything of it and just drop them. Thanks so much for responding it helped. Okay sassyash you are doing the right thing not contacting him and if he contacts you no you should not reply. This guy has ALOT of growing up to do before he deserves someone like you. I know its hard to stop thinking about him now but in time he will mean nothing to you. I know you're feeling bad now but you should try and hang out with friends and even meet some new people (doesn't have to be boys). It will get better and you deserve much better than this guy
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