lloydt Posted June 11, 2009 Posted June 11, 2009 Okay here’s my scenario, I met my “ex” on Valentines Day in a bar. It was an instant attraction, which everyone noticed. I’d just got out of a relationship and she was living with her boyfriend of 5 years who was out for her brother-in-law stag do. She came back to mine and we slept with each other. We went out on a date a few days later & really got to know each other. She came back to mine & we made out in the front room. She said I made her feel like a teenager and when she went to leave, things got hot and we ended up in bed together. A few days later I had a gig and she was out on her sister’s hen do. I picked her up after my gig, she came back to mine and we stayed up all night. She told me she got butterflies when I text her. We went on to have some amazing sex and slept for about 45 minutes before she left. She called me a few days later saying that we shouldn’t see each other because she had a boyfriend & was going away for her sister’s wedding with him. I told her I understood and said hopefully we could be friends. She called me a few days later saying she missed me and we even though we’d only known each other for 2 weeks, she couldn’t imagine her life without me. When she was away she text me everyday and when she got back she came round to see me and told me she thought of me everyday. I held back because I didn’t know what her situation with her boyfriend was but we ended up kissing and then having sex. She told me that she was going to ask her boyfriend to move out and that she wasn’t looking to get into another relationship but we then spent the next week together more or less being a couple. We didn’t see each the following week but spoke on the phone everyday. She came round on Sunday and we hung out. I told her I’d cook for her the following weekend. I spoke to her a few times that week but was busy with work and also didn’t want to be clingy. She came round for dinner on Friday and I cleaned the house, bought ingredients from 3 stores and got a nice bottle of champagne. She came round and it was going great. Later she said she’d bought a nurses outfit and if I could tell her what tattoo she was getting she’d wear it for me the following day. I couldn’t remember so she said that I didn’t know anything about her and started crying but also frantically kissing me. She left and when she got home, she called me to say sorry for spoiling the evening. The next day I went out drinking all day with my mate and she met me after she finished work. When she turned up she seemed to be ignoring me and I found myself making an effort to hang out with her. I got annoyed and went home (also because I was really drunk). In the morning she called me and finished it saying that she needed some time on her own having just got out of a 5 year relationship and hoped we’d be friends one day. I played it cool on the phone but afterwards I was devastated. I text her a week later saying I missed her and she replied saying she’d been thinking about me too but it needed to be like this for a while. A few days after that I was driving to work and the police had closed off the road where her shop is. I got worried and text her to see if she was all right. She called me and said she was fine, we only spoke for a few minutes asking how each other was and then she said she’d call me. I left it for a few weeks and then it got to her birthday and I wondered whether I should wish her. I ended up texting her to say happy birthday and she responded and hoped I was keeping well. Then a few days later I started writing an e-mail to her saying that I understood her situation, I didn’t hate her for it and hoped we’d be friends one day. She e-mailed back saying that she never wanted a relationship and that I was only thinking of myself and not her. I got hot-headed and replied with a few home truths and she deleted me off facebook. I really regret sending her an e-mail in the 1st place and should have continued the no contact. It’s been a month now and I haven’t heard from her. I still miss her loads and regret how stupid I acted after it ended. Without bragging I usually am a bit of a lady’s man but when I met my “ex” I genuinely thought she was the one even though it was a strange situation and still can’t believe how it went so sour because I couldn’t remember what tattoo she wanted. Please let me know your thoughts (if you’re still awake lol)….
boogieboy Posted June 11, 2009 Posted June 11, 2009 You know you got into the wrong situation in the first place by involving yourself with a woman who lived with someone. 2nd of all, if she could cheat on a live in bf, dont you think she'd do it to you eventually? (unless you like that sorta thing) Unfortunately for you, her bf has some sort of hold on her, and she didnt really want to leave him. I think, in her mind, you were only supposed to be a booty call and that was it. Once you tried to make it more, you ruined it for her, and thats when she started acting funny. I think her getting mad at you (for the tattoo) was her lame excuse to get out of this relationship with you. You never stood a chance. She was selfish in making you her fantasy to have her cake and eat it too. So from now on, if youre a ladies man, go get another one, just stick to the women who dont live with people.
BearPower Posted June 11, 2009 Posted June 11, 2009 I agree, you slept with her, KNOWING she was in a relationship. And she slept with you WHILE she was still in a Relationship. This is going no where. And that was VERY dishonest of BOTH of you. It sounds like that is also what rocked her 5 year relationship. Her poor ex, he must be devastated. Sorry, but I think you deserve to be slated for what you both did. Leave each other alone and go and sort out your issues.
Author lloydt Posted June 12, 2009 Author Posted June 12, 2009 Thanks for the feedback. I forgot to say in my defense that when I met her, she did say that her and her boyfriend were close to splitting up but looking at it you're both right and I'm just as much to blame
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