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Posted

I have posted a few times and was told about the NC Rule, I did follow it for 2 weeks, and broke it, unfortunately, if you have read my posts you would see why.

 

Today a friend of 20yrs came by, and told me that he had talk to my EX twice , he is engaged, (lots to risk, not thinking he is doing anything with her) He has disconnected ties with her because of what I will be explaining...

 

I found out from him tonight, that my Ex during the first 2 week period (Now Week 4) and me having NC with her for the first 2 weeks, that she had told him I said "He says you want to sleep with me" so once hearing this, from her he had only talked to her once since then and felt it wasn't right and disconnected all ties with her, as he didn't want anything to come between our friendship, anyways its now week 4 as mentioned, and back to NC, as I had broke it after the first 2 weeks (Regret it)

 

I so badly want to Text her and ask why she would say such a thing when I never said that at all, I figured it was said during my NC with her, to get a reaction from me and to message her, causing me to break the NC she's not use to by me, but its now 4 weeks after the fact, is it worth speaking of? or shall I not even bother and continue NC? Keep in mind, this is her 3rd time she has left me, and I have always welcomed her back with open arms, be it texting her back all the time, good or bad....

 

TY

Posted

To be short..your ex is trying to sleep with your boy! Close those arms and never welcome back that trash again!! I would hope you or anyone could do, and is capable of WAY better than that...she's gone/been gone/hopefully stays gone! GARBAGE!!!

Posted

Yeah shes trash. Anything you say to her will have no effect. Dont even bother and dont look back. Thats just a shame.

Posted

Yep. She was trying to manipulate both you and your bud. Don't fall for it. Stay NC. Maybe she was also hoping for added jollies of screwing things up between you and your friend, and/or him and his girl. Don't fall for any of her crap. Stay NC.

  • Author
Posted
Yep. She was trying to manipulate both you and your bud. Don't fall for it. Stay NC. Maybe she was also hoping for added jollies of screwing things up between you and your friend, and/or him and his girl. Don't fall for any of her crap. Stay NC.

 

 

What upsets me even more was we had set an appointment for the counciller sometime ago, as posted recently,,

 

What I haven't posted yet, was 2 days ago, (Sorry lot of Txtd Msg quotes here) she txtd me several times, "Good Nite", out of the blue, still NC, bumped into at work, she txtd and said "nice pants" (one she bought me) then txtd again saying "why am I so cold towards her" and "I am not reacting the way I usually do" (which is why I truely believe was said to my friend was to get me to react to her, as I was NC with her then, something she is not use too by me), then txtd saying "I wanna to tell you something important" (course she never did tell me), then txtd me back and said "its ok, I don't want to bother you", then another txtd saying "I really Miss You" another saying "do you even want me at this Councilling session with you?" and "Do you even want to work this out?" still not breaking the NC and her last one "Just know I miss you and I will see you there in a week"

 

As mentioned, I am not really expecting her to be there, but I am still 100% going for myself and because its been long waited, as the list is long, I feel as though its coming fast...but If she does show, should I bring that incident up? between what was said to my friend?

 

This all just happening Monday night (have heard nothing from her since), this is why I am so confused and I realize maybe I shouldn't be.

Posted

Dude, first off this girl is a crazy selfish.....you know what...no offense but you will come to realize this sooner or later.

 

Her hanging out with your friend is just her trying to get your attention in the most selfish way possible. No contact, don't ask her anything. Pretend you don't care and NOTHING bothers you from her.

 

Right now she expects you to freak out when you find out about this and this will make her feel better about herself by you giving her attention and that you care. Do the opposite and watch what will happen...it will amaze you. She will become bitter and angry at you for not "giving her attention" but you have done nothing wrong, so in time she will realize she's just angry at herself. Let her go, move on, don't look back as hard as it is you must do it!

  • Author
Posted
Dude, first off this girl is a crazy selfish.....you know what...no offense but you will come to realize this sooner or later.

 

Her hanging out with your friend is just her trying to get your attention in the most selfish way possible. No contact, don't ask her anything. Pretend you don't care and NOTHING bothers you from her.

 

Right now she expects you to freak out when you find out about this and this will make her feel better about herself by you giving her attention and that you care. Do the opposite and watch what will happen...it will amaze you. She will become bitter and angry at you for not "giving her attention" but you have done nothing wrong, so in time she will realize she's just angry at herself. Let her go, move on, don't look back as hard as it is you must do it!

 

 

Thanks HF123, they're not hanging out, but I definetly agree with you and know what your saying, as its the same results and expectations on her part, eg..getting me to react because at the time it was said, I was on the NC rule, its hard to implement the NC rule, but when I didn't implement it, it was more hard as she treated me as though she had regained control and was happy again, leaving me hurt, but that made me realize how important the NC rule really is and am using it again, as mentioned, I am still going for councilling, thats for my benefit, to help me overcome this large hurdle in my life...It's actually gotten to the point when I wanted to Txt message her so bad just to say I Am Done With You and Your Games, but figured the fact I contacted her would only please her....

 

TY

Posted

dude,

 

Do NOT break no contact. Don't text, Don't call, Don't IM, dont anything. Sorry to be harsh but everytime you contact her, its only going to hurt you more...trust me, i've went through this.

 

When you contact her, it shows her that she still has the power, even if you do contact her to tell her "i'm done with you"...thats just telling her that you are thinking of her and going out your way to say that.

 

If you are done with her, and want her to know...its simple just go out, have fun, become confident, date others, and DO NOT CONTACT HER!

 

I even went as far as deleting her phone number from my phone just so that when alcohol comes in play, you don't make any mistakes. You can write it down and hide it somewhere from yourself.

Posted

I agree, stay no contact.

 

She is playing selfish and extremely immature games, and she's not even good at it!

 

Rise above it and concern yourself with something much more important than what she is saying or texting or scheming - concern yourself with YOU. When you do that, hopefully you will recognize the true colors of this person, and the petty, childish games will become something to pity her over.

 

It really is quite pathetic, and she is actually making a fool of herself, if you think about it...

Good luck!

  • Author
Posted

Thanks All, the last text from her I rec'd was from her was "N when u know what you want, let me know" which was Friday Night, I had the urge to text her, but what I have been doing all this time is sending the text message urges to my female friend, as to help me stop sending them to the Ex.

 

the problem I ran into, was I messed up, I ended up sending a text saying "Thats what the councellor is for" (which was explained im my previous posts we were suppose to see together for the first time after our breakup, thats in a week)to the Ex by accident, because they both have very similar numbers (2 last digits reversed order) and no names attached to them on my contact list, so I guess I messed up huh?, my Ex only replied "Good Morning", guess my biggest fault was not erasing her number, which I did right after that, and feel its best to keep my Cell off.

 

TY

LiL

  • Author
Posted
Thanks All, the last text from her I rec'd was from her was "N when u know what you want, let me know" which was Friday Night, I had the urge to text her, but what I have been doing all this time is sending the text message urges to my female friend, as to help me stop sending them to the Ex.

 

the problem I ran into, was I messed up, I ended up sending a text saying "Thats what the councellor is for" (which was explained im my previous posts we were suppose to see together for the first time after our breakup, thats in a week)to the Ex by accident, because they both have very similar numbers (2 last digits reversed order) and no names attached to them on my contact list, so I guess I messed up huh?, my Ex only replied "Good Morning", guess my biggest fault was not erasing her number, which I did right after that, and feel its best to keep my Cell off.

 

TY

LiL

 

 

Not to mention I am sure she may think I just showed weakness, and feel that all my NC was for nothing...back on NC if that matters anymore

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