Tell Me About This

[Mike B.]

As many of us here, I was led to this site after a disappointing breakup with someone. While I am well over my situation after strictly adhering to the No Contact rule which helped tremendously, I sort of felt a "lightweight" surge of that disappointing and feeling of betrayal again when she sent me an email earlier this week asking if I hated her. I didn't respond. I have moved on. It doesn't matter much any more.

 

Last night as I rested in bed, I began to think of my past relationships and crushes. I then began to think about my first major crush on a girl. It made me feel great just thinking about her and laughing how head over hills I was over her. I thought about the last moment we saw each other and how it was such a fulfilling moment in my life and it resolved a very big void that I feared I would have for the rest of my life until I saw her that one last time. The moment was perfect. Those 5 or so minutes we saw each other and talked for the last time is one of my most fondest memories in life. I slept really well that night and last night.

 

So I would like you all to take a break for one moment here. I would like for you to take a break and tell me about the biggest crush you ever had on someone but it has to be a person that did not hurt you or break your heart. I don't care how old you were when you had this crush or how long is lasted. Just tell me about it. I would love to read about it.

[bluewolf17]

I met Scott in 7th grade. He was "dating" my friend. I instantly thought he was the man of my dreams. We quickly became best friends. Talking on the phone everynight, talking about our dreams, and the people we would become. We dated in 8th grade (ha!) for two months. It went terribly! But we stayed friends after. We were friends all the way through high school, and even know. So I guess overall it's been over 13 years. I rememer being young, and praying to God that we would be married. I though he was just the most handsome, sweet guy. He was my first huge crush.

 

He never broke my heart, and I never broke his. We just got older, and our taste changed. He dated girls who were five foot two and 90 lbs. I dated smart athletic guys. We just weren't a match. BUT we shared so many young sweet romantic moments. We "discovered" our sexual selves with eachother. It was perfect, as we were young, and thought we were untouchable. We were always just friends, but cared so much for eachother that we got to "experiment".

 

I don't regret a thing! We still see eachother (in fact, I will see him Friday) and we always have so much fun together. When I see him, it reminds me of that young love, and how hopeful and powerful that was. We still just smile and know that we had this fun, secret world, and no one can take that away.

[NopeNah]

I can't!! Every girl i've been with has had all of me(my mistake??)..non-the-less..I hope they're all doing well..haha! bull****! what goes around!!

[CaliGuy]

Well my biggest crush was from 3rd grade to 10th grade in school. She knew I loved her. I was a small kid from a poor family. She cared about me as a friend and even defended me against bullies one time (seriously, they were older kids and she cared about me, even if she didn't want to date me). She ran them off, lol. (I was 11 at the time). She was always my friend even though the romantic feelings were never mutual.

 

She was affected by Leukemia in 10th grade and had chemo. She lost 60lbs and all her hair. She didn't look the same at all but I still loved her. She came to school wearing a wig and I didn't even recognize her. I asked her to the movies once and she acted like she didn't know me. We all thought she was in remission. A few months later, she died.

 

As a 16 year old boy, I have never experienced anything like that before and to this day I still think about her. A few weeks later I was walking the halls in school and found her class schedule. It's in my yearbook to this day along with the memoir from her funeral.

 

Kristen: 2/4/69. Rest in peace...

[t0ri]

Aw, Caliguy! What a bittersweet story. How cute that she protected you! Very sad that she died at such a young age though

 

I had a huge crush on my best guy friend all throughout high school. Everyone could tell that he was gay except me, I was in denial or something lol. It's really funny to me now that I couldn't see it. But he finally came out to me our senior year, before he told anyone else. He's still my best friend

[Mike B.]

Those are great stories. I really enjoyed reading them. Caliguy, that was quite a moving story. I will post mine later but until then, it would be great to have some more posted.

[Mike B.]

Come on, where are all the stories? We have all had that one special crush in our lives at some point or another. Take a break from focusing on the person in your life that is currently sending your heart through the wringer and tell us about that special crush.

[Leveller]

Mine was a girl called Hayley from when I was about 16/17. I always liked her but was way too shy to ask her out...I realise now though she liked me too. I remember watching The Butterfly Effect with my Ex ex (ex?)...and I thought about her (dated, marriage, kids etc.). Might sound a bit silly but it had a profound effect on me.

 

Love that film...all the little collisions in life that make us who we are ('if' being the middle word in LIFE). Caliguy that was such a moving story.

[CaliGuy]

Thanks all. I still think about her a lot. Sad but true story.

[Mike B.]

I first met Angie in the 7th grade. She was a new student at my school that year. She lived near the school while I commuted from the other side of town. I had not paid her much attention until we first spoke to each other. The first time we spoke to each other was in the form on an argument during class. I don’t recall what we were arguing about but we were really up in each other’s face. We would argue again years later but I recall that argument well and am not proud of it.

 

If you were there during our shouting match, you would have sworn that we were about to come to blows but I don’t fight girls, nevertheless, it was heated. I backed down with admiration from the fact that she stood up to me, someone much bigger. She was really feisty during the fight. When I turned away to ignore her, I looked back to witness her slumping down to the chair at her desk in tears. She was so upset over our fight that she cried but she cried silently. As I stared at her while her face turned red, tears rolled down her cheeks. It was then I realized how amazingly beautiful she was. I was crazy about her ever since.

 

She was all I thought about afterwards. Although we eventually made up and began to talk to each other in a friendly manner, I had trouble getting up the nerves to tell her just how I felt about her. From the day we fought until the day we graduated from the 8th grade, I never missed a day of school…rain, sleet or snow, I was present every single day. To admire her beautiful face was the highlight of my day.

 

To be so lovely, she was remarkably down to Earth and considered to be “cool.” Except for one female bully in our class, she was well-received by everyone.

 

My best friend at the time, David, had to endure almost daily announcements of my crush on her. I loved the guy because he never tired of hearing it for years. He encouraged me frequently to confess to her to no avail. For reasons I won’t go into besides just having extreme butterflies, I just couldn’t do it even when the opportunity presented itself.

 

I recall how great I felt during our 8th grade school dance. The dance started off with every student in attendance being too shy, at first, to get on the dance floor except for Angie. The girls were on one side of the room, the boys the other. The teachers and principal constantly prodded everyone to start dancing but none of us moved initially. Angie moved first. All eyes were on her as she confidently walked across the gym alone over to the boys’ side of the room. She commanded that much attention.

 

Her path ended right in front of me. She looked me into my eyes and asked, “Do you want to dance?” I froze. My head shook and she floated right back over to the girls’ side of the room unharmed by my rejection. All of my fellow male classmates immediately harass me and ask “what in the hell is wrong with you?” One classmate, Eddie, yelled “you just turned down an offer for a dance from the foxiest girl in the 8th grade!” They were all so disappointed in me and I was disappointed in myself. That year, we graduated and I was happy to find out that we would be attending the same high school as I.

 

In high school, Angie “blew up.” She ran track and was on the volleyball team. Not to my surprise, she quickly became one of the most popular girls at our school and was maturing into an even more appealing young woman. I didn’t go too long throughout a school week without overhearing one of the guys in my school whispering what they would do to Angie if they had a chance to be alone with her. It sort of made me jealous that she was getting so much attention. I wanted her for myself but took interest in other girls as well. The guts to admit to her how I felt seem to never develop so she lived her high school life and I lived mine. We occasionally chatted, especially if we had a class together. She even told me about the time she gave another guy at our school… Anyway, in my senior year, I transferred to another school due to racial tension, leaving Angie behind. I thought I would never see her again.

 

Even after my high school graduation, I always wondered about her. Feelings of being unfulfilled hung over me since I never told her how I felt about her during all of those years. During my college years at the local university, I met my second biggest crush of my life, Diane. We dated for years but thoughts of Angie surfaced occasionally.

 

One day, after about seven years since the last time I had seen Angie, I was out shopping at a department store. While walking through the store, someone suddenly bumped into me. A quick glance of her nametag suggested that she worked there. She looked about 9 months pregnant and had a round face. A face much more round than what I had remembered. It was Angie still looking just as beautiful as ever.

 

We spent the next few minutes getting caught up. She told me she was engaged and flashed a huge rock on her finger. “It was nice seeing you,” she said, “but I have to get back to work.” As we both turned away from each other, I turned back and said “Angie, there is something I have wanted to tell you for years. She turned around to face me again. “I’ve always had a huge crush on you.” She waddled a few steps closer to me. She took my right hand into hers, stared directly into my eyes, and gave my hand a gentle squeeze for just a couple of seconds. She slowly released it, turned in the opposite direction and continued on her way. A smiled stretched across my face as she walked away from me for the last time.

 

I immediately finished my shopping and drove home to Diane. I rushed through the door of our apartment and told her all about my encounter with Angie. “I finally did it,” I said triumphantly. I told Angie about my crush on her and I felt relieved. Diane grabbed hold of my shoulders, gave me a big smile and said “you are so cute.”

 

Although Angie will never know just how much of an impact she had on my younger life, I can live with that. Just as long as she knew that I had a big crush on her from the beginning.