lookAlive Posted June 10, 2009 Posted June 10, 2009 Alright I made a thread about this before but it seems like threads move pretty fast around here so read the first paragraph if you want to be caught up to speed: This girl and I met during the semester and initially hit it off. We went on a series of lunch dates and met up a few times on weekends and we're texting and such for about a month or so. I could tell we both liked each other but knew she was holding back to an extent for some reason. We talked after a bit and she said she had a lot of fun hanging out with me but wanted to focus on friends and school since it was near the end of the year, and I agreed with her to an extent that holding a relationship over the summer away from one another would be difficult. Her friend said all of her friends thought I was doing great and that she could have regretted it in the future, but what it was her decision. So we stayed friends for the last few weeks of school and I spent a night dancing with her on the last week and talked to her here and there before leaving. I still think about this girl all the time and know I still have feelings for her. It's been about a month since we've been out of school, I figured I should give her a call to simply catch up and see how the summer's been going for both of us, just normal discussion. But my friend and I talked for a long long time and he suggested that if I do call her, to bring up my feelings and listen to her side as well. I think it's only natural to discuss each other's feelings, and when I feel this way about someone I feel like its something that will happen no matter what, its just when it will. My question is: I plan on calling this girl soon, should I just carry conversation normally and see how it goes, hoping to get on a calling basis where I can talk to her every couple weeks or something, and then tell her how I'm feeling a little further down the road this summer or... Do I call her up, carry normal conversation initially, and then address what I'm feeling and just try to have a natural discussion about it. I feel like this could go either way so I'm pretty stumped on which way to go..Trying not to get my hopes up because I know it could smack me in the face, but I do care a lot about this.
mammax3 Posted June 10, 2009 Posted June 10, 2009 I would suggest keeping it light for that first phone call. It's been a month since you've seen her, and you have no idea what sort of experiences she's had in the last few weeks. Maybe she's had some challenges and would prefer to be listened to, rather than surprised with a whole lot of emotion that would sit too heavy with her. Or maybe she's just enjoying hanging out and chilling with her friends and isn't ready to be all heavied at. Of course, she might be pining for you too, in which case playing it cool would be advantageous too. You know the situation best, and would be able to read the phone call for how to play it. But it's often best to go in slow and collect information.
Recommended Posts