conehead Posted June 8, 2009 Posted June 8, 2009 I don't know what to do, really, lol. Ever since I met my bf, I"ve gotten physically hurt and it's such a pain, eps since I heal slow and scar easily. Please excuse my long story. My bf loves skiing and for many months he kept persuading me to go. I told him I can't go because I hurt my ankle a few years ago and it can't take vigorous acitivity and he said it won't matter because the ski boot will protect your ankle..impossible to sprain. Finally, I said ok. We went 3 months ago and lo and behold I sprained my ankle and it it doesn't hurt anymore when I walk now, BUT I still can't wear heels!! For a girl, that really sucks lol. I talked to people and they were all surprised that I sprained my ankle from skiiing beacuse of of the boot, and so I didn't exaclty blame my bf for it. I told him I"m too scared to ever going skiing again, and he was fine with it as he feels bad for my ankle. Fast forward to last weekend. I visited his parent's place for the 3rd time and they have a tiny dog known for having bitten a few people on the ankle, yet they let the dog roam loosely around the house. As such, everytime I see the dog I get really nervous, esp since I don't want her to bit my ankle that is still soemwhat healing from the sprain! A reinjury would be really bad for me as I'm a slow healer . Anyway, on saturday my bf put the doggy on his lap and I sat next to him. When someone opened the door, the doggy got REALLY excited and while it jumped down it SCRATCHED my thigh!! Luckily, it scratched it over my jean skirt (as opposed to exposed skin) but even then with my sensitive skin I devloped 2 six-inch long welts on my thigh and it was bright red. I rinsed with water and applied aloe vera over it and the welt died down but now I got 2 long, red, ugly lines on my thigh (it's been 2 days and still there). I fear so greatly that I'd scar from it because I scar so easily. Even after that, his parents let the dog roam around the house and I was very scared for the remainder of the weekend lol. Well, my dilemma is, how do I tell my bf that Im scared to visit him parents house again beause of that dog? I mean, his folks really LOVE that dog but I'm scared of it!!! It's tiny and cute, but deadly. I dont want to get more scars (I hope this scratch won't scar cuz it's long and ugly!) and I'm scared of being bitten in the ankle . I just feel its irresponsible of his parents...and I want to tell my bf that I'm scared to visit but hopefully they can keep the dog in a room or something when I visit and that will be ok for me. Is that reasoanble? His parents will probably dislike me for being a wuss but what else can I do?
girl68 Posted June 8, 2009 Posted June 8, 2009 the 2 incidents are completely unrelated. and the dog has nothing to do with your boyfriend. you have a fear of dogs, tell your guy that.
Els Posted June 8, 2009 Posted June 8, 2009 It would be utterly inconsiderate of him to watch that happen (you did show the welts to him?) and not try to think or discuss with you about how to prevent such a future incident. If any pet of mine ever hurt a guest (by accident or not), I would take great pains to ensure that that never happens again, especially not to the same guest.
Lucky_One Posted June 8, 2009 Posted June 8, 2009 I don't think I'd call these two incidents of "being hurt physically" any sort of trend. I feel a little sorry for your BF! LOL! Lord knows what will happen if you ever get pregnant and get hemorrhoids or stretch marks!
dreamergrl Posted June 8, 2009 Posted June 8, 2009 You are getting hurt because of things that happen while you're with your bf, not because of your boyfriend.
Author conehead Posted June 8, 2009 Author Posted June 8, 2009 Ok, it's not exactly a trend, but my bf is not exactly careful either. I did show him my welts (they were pretty dramatic ones cuz I've got sensitive skin and allergies) and while he feels bad for it, they still kept the doggy roaming around. I really hate to sound high-maintenance, but for my own sanity, I can't go back to that house ever again if the doggy is roaming around it. I don't think I have a fear of dogs per say, but rather an overall fear of getting hurt in general lol. But it results from the fact that I have hayfever, allergies, sensitive skin and such and am not good with handling getting hurt.
Els Posted June 8, 2009 Posted June 8, 2009 I do agree with the other posters that it isn't the bf's fault, and you definitely shouldn't blame him FOR your injuries. In your shoes, I would simply request that he (not the parents) just pick up the dog and put it in the room while you're there -- it's his dog as well right? Not much of an effort. But I wouldn't go into dramatics because of it. If your being 'high maintenance' (nothing wrong with that IMO as long as you are that way because of medical issues and not because you think that you deserve better than other people do, etc) causes a lot of clashes with him, you're probably not compatible anyway. I wouldn't be compatible with a very outdoorsy guy because I will NEVER go camping/jungle trekking/etc, period. I don't care if it's his damn life passion -- it's just not for me, my skin allergies would flare up and I'd be exceedingly miserable, plus I'd have to dose myself with corticosteroids for the next few weeks if I went.
Soul Bear Posted June 8, 2009 Posted June 8, 2009 I would by a protective bubble to keep away all the beasties from the outside world. Plus it would be fun to roll around in a human sized, padded hamster wheel.
Author conehead Posted June 8, 2009 Author Posted June 8, 2009 I do agree with the other posters that it isn't the bf's fault, and you definitely shouldn't blame him FOR your injuries. In your shoes, I would simply request that he (not the parents) just pick up the dog and put it in the room while you're there -- it's his dog as well right? Not much of an effort. But I wouldn't go into dramatics because of it. If your being 'high maintenance' (nothing wrong with that IMO as long as you are that way because of medical issues and not because you think that you deserve better than other people do, etc) causes a lot of clashes with him, you're probably not compatible anyway. I wouldn't be compatible with a very outdoorsy guy because I will NEVER go camping/jungle trekking/etc, period. I don't care if it's his damn life passion -- it's just not for me, my skin allergies would flare up and I'd be exceedingly miserable, plus I'd have to dose myself with corticosteroids for the next few weeks if I went. Ya know, I've been thinking about that as well. I was truly disappointed in not being able to ski with him again. I orignally really didn't want to, but thought I'd give it a go since skiing is like his fave thing to do in the world and I want to share his passion with him. But I'm just physically unable to do it. It is quite sad because he got alot of his friends into skiing and they'd head out in groups to do it, yet his gf (me) is the only one who couldn't join him. It is quite unfair though for some posters to make fun of me...if you had super sensitive skin and allergies like me, perhaps you'd understand. Minor scratches don't normally produce gigantic welts in people with normal skin...
Els Posted June 8, 2009 Posted June 8, 2009 Ya know, I've been thinking about that as well. I was truly disappointed in not being able to ski with him again. I orignally really didn't want to, but thought I'd give it a go since skiing is like his fave thing to do in the world and I want to share his passion with him. But I'm just physically unable to do it. It is quite sad because he got alot of his friends into skiing and they'd head out in groups to do it, yet his gf (me) is the only one who couldn't join him. IMO it's quite normal for people to have hobbies that they share with their friends but not their SO. Many women I know go on shopping sprees with their girlfriends, and their bf doesn't feel obligated to go along. Many guys I know have gaming parties with their buddies, and their gf isn't interested in playing video games. It's all cool, as long as it doesn't cause clashes/arguments/issues. They usually do take 'sorry, not interested' or 'honey, I can't' for an answer, though.
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