Trialbyfire Posted June 7, 2009 Posted June 7, 2009 my marinade for seduction a nice dinner & drinks at a fancy restaurantalpha-charm which includes sexy compliments and laughter with a heavy dose of long eye contactcandle light with some romantic musicmore booze There's nothing that says romance like thick beer goggles!
alphamale Posted June 7, 2009 Posted June 7, 2009 There's nothing that says romance like thick beer goggles! i will not be vague: :love:
Author Woggle Posted June 7, 2009 Author Posted June 7, 2009 I don't know that men are more willing to stay in a bad situation but we tend to not have unrealistic standards of perfection that only exist in fantasy. Many men like looking at out porn and our dirty mags but most of us know that really life is nothing like that and that these women are heavily airbrushed and enhanced. Many women on the other hand watch these romance movies and read these books and think that real life is actually supposed to be like that. God help the man that doesn't live up to these impossible standards because she will grow to resent the hell out of him. She will feel like she settled because he is a human being and not some perfect man that only exists in her fantasies.
Land Shark Posted June 7, 2009 Posted June 7, 2009 I don't know that men are more willing to stay in a bad situation but we tend to not have unrealistic standards of perfection that only exist in fantasy. Many men like looking at out porn and our dirty mags but most of us know that really life is nothing like that and that these women are heavily airbrushed and enhanced. Many women on the other hand watch these romance movies and read these books and think that real life is actually supposed to be like that. God help the man that doesn't live up to these impossible standards because she will grow to resent the hell out of him. She will feel like she settled because he is a human being and not some perfect man that only exists in her fantasies. I think you're idealizing men and demonizing women. You are talking more about caricatures than you are real people. There are hints of truth in what you are saying, but only hints.
Storyrider Posted June 7, 2009 Posted June 7, 2009 I used to go out with a guy who could conduct three hour conversations comprised almost exclusively of quips from celebrities he admired or films he liked. "I'll try anything once except incest and line-dancing..." seemed to be his favourite. What often gets me is I think the guy is actually being witty, only to learn later that he's just memorized lots of movies I've never seen. Not to mention the millions of American men who've perfected their awful, fake British accents over lines like, "She turned me into a Newt!" and "No one expects the Spanish Inquisition!!" not yelping like a papillon when you're about to come That gives a new meaning to doggy-style.
FleshNBones Posted June 7, 2009 Posted June 7, 2009 Whenever you hear some women complaining about their men you always hear how she is doing all the emotional work or that he is not a partner or how he emotionally abandoned her or how she feels unloved. What are these even supposed to mean? Why can't more women just come right out and say what their beef is? More men would make the effort if women came right out and said what is bothering them.Sending mixed messages seems to come naturally to most women. It seems like a guys inability to read a women is proof of his insentitivity to her.
BlueHarvest Posted June 8, 2009 Posted June 8, 2009 Well, in a simple manipulative way: if you keep things vague in terms of being 'unhappy' or 'unsatisfied', you can go back and change your story as much as is needed in order to justify any future behaviors, or suit a particular purpose. Seriously though... I honestly think that woman have had the 'shoulds' shoved down their throats for so many years that they honestly don't know what they want. They are torn between what they actually want and what society tells them they should want as women. Pick up any women's magazine, any relationship self help book, etc. They aren't telling them how to be happy. They are telling them that they need a man to be complete. So, they get a man and they are left with this huge void inside where their personal happiness ought to be. Think about it - how many women do you see who are personally happy and satisfied with their lives that they don't revolve around getting a man, keeping a man, or mourning the loss of one? If that void were filled first, and women were urged to figure out what makes them personally happy and the focus was taken off of pairing up, then you may see a lot more women out there who don't need to be vague. Women who aren't dissatisfied. Women who know what they want and aren't afraid to articulate it. Women who choose relationships, and are not compelled to be in them for the sake of being in them. I'm not saying we don't need men. I'm saying we need to be more aware of ourselves in relation to those men, and stop holding them responsible for our happiness. You men would be much, much more happy with a self actualized woman. Not a (dare I say it) feminist - but an honest to goodness woman who knows herself and can share happiness with you instead of leech it out of you. That vague dissatisfaction is what is missing inside themselves, not in the relationships - why? Because they are basing their happiness on external, not internal things. It is unfortunate that our society uses the media to spoonfeed us bullsh*t, and a good deal of us line right up to pay our cash for the privilege. Wonderful post. Really brings insight into my relationship. However what should one do if they find themselves with said female companion? I've known she had a void, and I've tried to help her fill it correctly (not with me but by actually helping her fill her void with what she thinks is her issues). To no avail. I feel like I'm wasting my time here. Cutting my losses and walking away feels like a healthier decision but the feelings I have for her are what is keeping me with her.
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