Lucky555 Posted June 6, 2009 Posted June 6, 2009 "you seem more interested in reading this stuff about me" or "you really want to know this about me don't you". He will throw things like this out and it makes me feel as if he is trying to flatter himself or boost his ego. Its like he wants me to call me out for "liking" him (which i kind of do but I'm not in a position to be dating right now/ not working and looking for a new job) or find out my interest level. It also makes me think he is trying to gain some sort of "power" by having me admit that i like him. I think its also conceded how this particular guy does this i believe its him trying to be "cocky and funny" to keep things "non-committed" and light. I am by no means mentioning or asking commitment. we are not dating or anything. I just noticed he does these types of things in EVERY CONVERSATION. We don't talk much but he has been doing this more lately. (I avoid it and keep on the subject we are talking about because I don't know what he is trying to do.) I am just going with the flow of things and not expecting much to happen between me and this guy but it would be nice to know what the hell he trying to accomplish by "acting" this way. Thoughts?
MusicChick24 Posted June 6, 2009 Posted June 6, 2009 To me he either sounds very conceeded or he thinks it might lighten the mood to say things like that. I'm not very sure.
norajane Posted June 6, 2009 Posted June 6, 2009 Can you give us some examples of what he's referring to? On it's face, it does sound like some kind of power play...or he's got something to hide and your questions are making him uneasy and he's trying to deflect the topic to you rather than him.
Left in a Lurch Posted June 6, 2009 Posted June 6, 2009 Based on very little information I think you are sending him mixed signals and he is trying to figure you out. You're confused I think about where you want it to go, so I would bet anything he just doesn't get you, he is trying to gauge your interest. If you are asking personal things or showing a personal interest when he gives these answers, just think about what you wrote, "(which i kind of do but I'm not in a position to be dating right now/ not working and looking for a new job) ". If you are confused about him, he is definitely confused about you because I guarantee you are sending major mixed signals based on your statement. I bet you dance on the line of being friendly-interested in dating and just friendly. Guys get this a lot and we are of the mindset of either you want to date us or you don't, timing is irrelevent. "Maybe interested but not really interested today" just makes little sense to a guy I think. His questions are probably trying to get you to commit to being interested or not, instead of straddling the fence. If a guy flirts, he is interested. If a woman flirts nobody really knows what it means. That's why a guy invented the "Do you like me?" notes in grade school. Just a simple check "Yes" or "No". The telling part is guys had to add instructions to "Check only one" at the top.
Ariadne Posted June 6, 2009 Posted June 6, 2009 it would be nice to know what the hell he trying to accomplish by "acting" this way. Thoughts? He is seducing you, and by your post it seems like he is getting to you.
Trialbyfire Posted June 6, 2009 Posted June 6, 2009 Lucky, have some fun with him. Lean in, look him straight in the eyes with a little half-smile and ask him "Are you interested in the answer to that/those questions? If so, why? If not, why not?"
CandiceIsMe Posted June 6, 2009 Posted June 6, 2009 I agree, call him out on it and think of ways to turn it back around on him! See how he reacts to it and post back here with the results so we can better help you on this..
Trialbyfire Posted June 6, 2009 Posted June 6, 2009 Brashing it out is a fun game. You keep it on edge but never confess, so it's a back and forth. It's a great way to hone your flirting skills when kept light and humorous. Come on girl, relax and enjoy it!
Author Lucky555 Posted June 6, 2009 Author Posted June 6, 2009 i think you are all right to call him out on it. I have not really done this as i just avoided what he was saying because I don't know what he doing. I don't want to say hey i am interested because this guy has a bit of an ego about himself (as a lot of men do). I don't want him to be too flattered. lol I was attracted to him because he is funny and he does like himself which gives him the allure of confidence. However, I'm not totally invested in the guy because as you all know how it all works, its a give and take. I think he is dancing around the topic of the chemistry and he is maybe trying to be flirty and funny as i think of it now. however, i think if he was wanting to date or something he would be contacting me more than he is now. During our conversation it sounded like he also had some issues and seemed depressed......a reason I don't want to really date him until he is "clear headed" enough because I really want to start out on a "right" foot so to speak instead of having other things occupy his mind. plus i'm looking for a job. Here is my plan. I will turn it around on him when he does this. I will casually talk to him. Right now I'm willing to be slow and interested in other men till I feel a solid connection with a guy to start dating. I'm not being a player, because i am not committed and no one has stated that they want to date me and I have not agreed to date anyone. So, I think he is trying to be funny, but i think his ego is apart of it.
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