fabulous_chk Posted June 5, 2009 Posted June 5, 2009 I am trying to get to know this guy better. We went out before and I like him enough to go out with him again. We've decided to meet up tonight, and when I suggested going to a strip club, he backed out. I'm really, really pissed! What the hell is wrong with him? Why would a normal, 28-year-old guy refuse to go to a strip club? Is there something wrong with him? Oh, he knows I'm bi. And he thinks I'm pretty. And he has been texting me nonstop since he has met me (I sent 3000 text messages in April). I don't get it.
czombie Posted June 5, 2009 Posted June 5, 2009 I am trying to get to know this guy better. We went out before and I like him enough to go out with him again. We've decided to meet up tonight, and when I suggested going to a strip club, he backed out. I'm really, really pissed! What the hell is wrong with him? Why would a normal, 28-year-old guy refuse to go to a strip club? Is there something wrong with him? Oh, he knows I'm bi. And he thinks I'm pretty. And he has been texting me nonstop since he has met me (I sent 3000 text messages in April). I don't get it. lol....maybe he realized he's an old fashioned guy and doesn't want to be with a bi chick....
BCCA Posted June 5, 2009 Posted June 5, 2009 2nd date at a strip club? No offense, and I think thats awesome, but youre going to find that a lot of guys arent that sexually open right off the bat. Also, he could just flat out feel uncomfortable about it. I honestly dont like strip clubs at all, and its not that I dont like seeing the girls, but most of the guys there are tools, the drinks are overpriced, and its not really a great place to chat with other people. So, I'm right about his age, and I have been to like 5 strip clubs in my life, and its been at least 5 years since the last time. This guy may just not be as sexual or enjoy that kind of thing as much as you do. You cant force sexuality on people, theyre either into it or theyre not.
WineCountry Posted June 5, 2009 Posted June 5, 2009 I am trying to get to know this guy better. We went out before and I like him enough to go out with him again. We've decided to meet up tonight, and when I suggested going to a strip club, he backed out. I'm really, really pissed! What the hell is wrong with him? Why would a normal, 28-year-old guy refuse to go to a strip club? Is there something wrong with him? Oh, he knows I'm bi. And he thinks I'm pretty. And he has been texting me nonstop since he has met me (I sent 3000 text messages in April). I don't get it. Good lord. You sent THAT many texts? Sheesh. As far as the strip club, I have actually ran into men that could care less about it. I mean, dont get me wrong, they have been. But, it was no big thrill to them because they said its just paying some chick to tease you, as they put it. I mean, I kind of have an interest in watching a lap dance performed on a guy I date one day, though I have never done it. A couple of guys I have dated in the past would have done it if i wanted them to of course, but really could have cared less. I was surprised too. I used to think all men would go nuts for strip clubs.
BCCA Posted June 6, 2009 Posted June 6, 2009 I used to think all men would go nuts for strip clubs. Common misconception Think about it, I can pay $20 to get in, and spend at least another 60-80 getting teased, or I can spend that much or less at a bar and have a MUCH better shot of getting laid.
Author fabulous_chk Posted June 6, 2009 Author Posted June 6, 2009 An old fashioned guy? He wanted me to come over his place for "drinks." Call me crazy but I find myself safer in a crowd. Yeah it is a second date but we've been talking for over 2 months! He is the only person who texts me nonstop, day after day, hour after hour. I think he finds me and my friends intimidating? Or maybe he thinks I'm crazy? Idk. BTW, he likes me being bi. He thinks it's awesome and he thinks we should get married (he was joking though). I don't like one-on-one dating. I feel pressured lol. I can't relax. I'd rather have a crowd, loud music, friends around. When it's quiet and it's just me and him i become *scared*
xpaperxcutx Posted June 6, 2009 Posted June 6, 2009 Going to a strip club with a guy makes you his buddy. He probably does want to get into your pants ( in a good way) but you're so open with him about your agressiveness (your bisexuality and your enjoyment at partying and going to strip clubs) I think he's a little taken aback. He probably just doesn't want you to friendzone him.
Author fabulous_chk Posted June 6, 2009 Author Posted June 6, 2009 Going to a strip club with a guy makes you his buddy. He probably does want to get into your pants ( in a good way) but you're so open with him about your agressiveness (your bisexuality and your enjoyment at partying and going to strip clubs) I think he's a little taken aback. He probably just doesn't want you to friendzone him. I think you got it right, xpaperxcutx. Thanks.
MrGeorge Posted June 6, 2009 Posted June 6, 2009 As far as stripclubs, they just don't interest me. Not for moral reasons by any means but always that feeling of " you can look but can't touch". Also maybe he's a bit self-conscious about bringing a female to a strip club. I'm sorry I really nothing to add to this except I keep thinking of the Seinfeld episode with the "roommate switch". I think xpaperxcutx has the best comment. Goodluck
39388 Posted June 6, 2009 Posted June 6, 2009 What the hell is wrong with him? Why would a normal, 28-year-old guy refuse to go to a strip club? Is there something wrong with him? Strip clubs are disgusting places that I refuse to go to. I think that way now and thought that way back when I was 28. I guess that makes me an abnormal guy?
Art_Critic Posted June 6, 2009 Posted June 6, 2009 I think you got it right, xpaperxcutx. Thanks. I think emergency action is required so he doesn't think you have friend zoned him.. Next time you see him... suggest to him that you sit on his face right now... that should do it.. no more worry about being friend zoned anymore
Mahatma Posted June 6, 2009 Posted June 6, 2009 I agree. If a girl wanted to take me to a strip club, I would take it as she wanted me to look at other girls. I would take it as she made me her friend.
Chrome Barracuda Posted June 6, 2009 Posted June 6, 2009 I am trying to get to know this guy better. We went out before and I like him enough to go out with him again. We've decided to meet up tonight, and when I suggested going to a strip club, he backed out. I'm really, really pissed! What the hell is wrong with him? Why would a normal, 28-year-old guy refuse to go to a strip club? Is there something wrong with him? Oh, he knows I'm bi. And he thinks I'm pretty. And he has been texting me nonstop since he has met me (I sent 3000 text messages in April). I don't get it. If a girl I was dating EARLY on in the relationship wanted to go to a strip club I'd think she's a freak! well for one maybe he's into you and doesnt want to delve on the deep end. it was too early suggesting it. And also maybe he's an old fashioned guy and you scared him off. Who knows. I think you popped out the freak box a little too early, should have saved that for later. that's all. give him time, maybe he'll come around, maybe he'll wont.
xpaperxcutx Posted June 6, 2009 Posted June 6, 2009 While it's easy to say " let's go to a strip club together" to a guy and get a shock out of it, no guy would actually really want to go to a strip club with a girl unless he's a friend and he has no interest in you. Clearly when he said he wanted to grab " drinks' with you, he really just wanted some alone time with you. Maybe the next time he asks you out, suggest going to brunch or dinner where you guys can be one on one. If you're afraid to have be alone with him, go to a more crowd friendly place, such as the museum or do an activity together where there are more people involved. I do think you're afraid to be completely alone with him and let him see you get vulnerable.
hairdiva09 Posted June 6, 2009 Posted June 6, 2009 Though you choose to be a bi woman, he may not want that for his relationship. Maybe he sees something in you and does not want to have to compete with both males AND females for your affection. You mentioned that he is 28yrs old...well maybe he has gotten that kind of stuff out of his system and really sees you and your personality as something he could be with for a while, insead of bed hopping...ya know..
MrGeorge Posted June 6, 2009 Posted June 6, 2009 I was actually thought this might lead to a ménage à trois. I have to get my head out of the sewer. Sorry about that. Ever since a few references of it were mentioned in 'Seinfeld', I've always been somewhat fascinated with it. take care G
Author fabulous_chk Posted June 6, 2009 Author Posted June 6, 2009 You guys are right. It was too early, I'm way too freaky for him, he's got the partying out of his system, etc, etc. Which means he is not the one for me, since I am not looking for a boring LTR right now. I just want uncomplicated fun. I have another guy that I've been to a strip club with, he is a little bit in love with me, and wants to see me again. Same age. Oh well...I'm a little sad but what can I do? Damage is done.
Author fabulous_chk Posted June 6, 2009 Author Posted June 6, 2009 I was actually thought this might lead to a ménage à trois. I have to get my head out of the sewer. Sorry about that. Ever since a few references of it were mentioned in 'Seinfeld', I've always been somewhat fascinated with it. take care G I'm actually a very jealous woman. I wish I could do a threesome, 2 g and 1 guy, but i'll end up getting jealous of the other girl! but 3 women threesome is fine.
MrGeorge Posted June 6, 2009 Posted June 6, 2009 I'm actually a very jealous woman. I wish I could do a threesome, 2 g and 1 guy, but i'll end up getting jealous of the other girl! but 3 women threesome is fine.your killing me here, lol, Its good that you are honest about this. I can't really be objective about this because the 'little general" in the southern hemisphere may attempt a 'coup' over the Big general' in the northern hemisphere. Anyways I still think i'd be aroused if a female liked it. cheers
Author fabulous_chk Posted June 6, 2009 Author Posted June 6, 2009 ^lol! I was trying to understand the "general" thing and the coup and finally after 30 seconds of massive thinking i got it haha! Update: I ended up watching a movie with friends. Then around 2 am he texted me, wanted me to come over his place, and i said yes. I just got home and it's 5:42 am. Yeah i asked him why, he wasn't into strip clubs, but he's into me! We made out, had lots of fun, and i'm a very happy girl right now! Thanks guys for your input!
Lucky_One Posted June 6, 2009 Posted June 6, 2009 You went to a guy's house after 2 am for a booty call, and he made you leave before 5:30am? This has the makings of a serious FB sitch.
MrGeorge Posted June 6, 2009 Posted June 6, 2009 ^lol! I was trying to understand the "general" thing and the coup and finally after 30 seconds of massive thinking i got it haha! Update: I ended up watching a movie with friends. Then around 2 am he texted me, wanted me to come over his place, and i said yes. I just got home and it's 5:42 am. Yeah i asked him why, he wasn't into strip clubs, but he's into me! We made out, had lots of fun, and i'm a very happy girl right now! Thanks guys for your input!congratulations, glad it all worked out, see you didnt need the club after all. What kind of movie did you watch? just curious
Author fabulous_chk Posted June 6, 2009 Author Posted June 6, 2009 You went to a guy's house after 2 am for a booty call, and he made you leave before 5:30am? This has the makings of a serious FB sitch. Nah, I was the one who insisted on leaving. =) FB is actually what I need right, this situation suits me nicely.
Author fabulous_chk Posted June 6, 2009 Author Posted June 6, 2009 congratulations, glad it all worked out, see you didnt need the club after all. What kind of movie did you watch? just curious Serendipity. Cute movie! Thank you, things are working out fine.
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