gopher Posted June 5, 2009 Posted June 5, 2009 For some reason I continue to attract or find women who are flakes or game players. Women who keep me on the back burner just in case the other guys don't work out, then they email or text me apologizing for being MIA. Before the women of LS blast me, . There are jerks and game players of BOTH sexes out there, I just don't date men so I can't comment on them.. Ultimately, I know this is all me, that something I am doing or about my personality lends itself to finding women like this. I know I need to work on myself and take a dating sabitical. I am so frustrated and irritated with myself over this.
carhill Posted June 5, 2009 Posted June 5, 2009 Try this. Next player or flake.... call her out, right to her face. Set her back on those stilettos Personally, IMO, if you're single and want a relationship, stay in the game. Get out for too long and you lose your edge. Take a short break, maybe a month, but continue to engage and meet people. Change up. Try new things. Every new day is a new opportunity
Author gopher Posted June 5, 2009 Author Posted June 5, 2009 Try this. Next player or flake.... call her out, right to her face. Set her back on those stilettos Personally, IMO, if you're single and want a relationship, stay in the game. Get out for too long and you lose your edge. Take a short break, maybe a month, but continue to engage and meet people. Change up. Try new things. Every new day is a new opportunity Thanks Carhill, Great advice on the first point. On the second, It's been so long since I've truly been excited about someone and they me, that I've forgotten what that is like...a month off sounds good.
kizik Posted June 5, 2009 Posted June 5, 2009 I disagree with Carhill a little bit. I think you should take yourself out of the game indefinitely. Dating is frustrating, and it's not something you should do if it frustrates you. Don't blame yourself for everything - although I would say it sounds like you allow women to treat you disrespectfully. I do agree that next time that crap happens, call em out on it. They'll respect you for it.
carhill Posted June 5, 2009 Posted June 5, 2009 Well, having dated off and on for about 20 years before getting married I found that, the longer I stayed away, the easier it was to stay away. It was only when I pushed through the frustrations that I achieved a modicum of success and satisfaction. YMMV, of course
Trialbyfire Posted June 5, 2009 Posted June 5, 2009 gopher, you're using an online site to date, aren't you? If so, there's a greater number of women to date, therefore, a greater number of flakes. I think with online dating, and plse don't scorch me over this, all you successful online daters, you have to wade through more gamers, since it's almost become the norm on these sites, or at least that's my impression from reading threads on LS. Why not kick back for awhile, for the online portion? Start to focus on real life meetings, whether randomly or by getting more involved with activities that lend to meeting single people. At least with real life meetings, it's easier to tell if someone's into you or not, through body language and actions.
carhill Posted June 5, 2009 Posted June 5, 2009 In my example, I did not generally consider online dating, as it did not exist during the majority of my single life. Point taken, though. Press some real-life flesh
TheBigQuestion Posted June 5, 2009 Posted June 5, 2009 My advice. If you have any mutual friends or acquaintances with any of the girls you be courtin', ask said friends about said girls. When they say something bad, take heed. If they say lots of bad things, give it one chance or two and then get the hell out!
Author gopher Posted June 6, 2009 Author Posted June 6, 2009 Thanks all, It is online dating and why I return to that I have no clue. I agree that I'd be better off taking a break for a while, and then seeing what develops in my real life.
kostoronto Posted June 6, 2009 Posted June 6, 2009 Yeah, Carhill's right. You have to call them out on it. If they really do like you, they'll smarten up. If they don't, they'll do you the favour of leaving.
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