Author MeaganRaye Posted June 4, 2009 Author Posted June 4, 2009 Therapy! Your need to control other people and destroy their property is a serious problem. No, it's not a problem. I am doing just fine. I've learned that its better I be alone anyway
bean1 Posted June 4, 2009 Posted June 4, 2009 No, it's not a problem. I am doing just fine. I've learned that its better I be alone anyway You think it is ok to destroy someone's property because you don't like the pictures? No, it's not. If ANY woman came on here and said "my boyfriend won't let me look at other men and destroyed a picture I had of some celebrity guys", everyone would scream RUN/abuse/controlling/insecure freak
Bejita463 Posted June 4, 2009 Posted June 4, 2009 No, it's not a problem. I understand your opinions on the other-women-obsession, but yes, it is a problem. There is something wrong if your opinions on this justify to you the destruction of property. I don't look at porn, go to strip clubs, stare at other women, don't smoke, don't drink, never done drugs, and am probably squeaky clean in other ways too. I can tell you from experience that even being the type of guy you described, that obsessive behavior is near unbearable. It is a serious communication blocker, and it impedes trust. You probably won't see this as a problem if you find the guy you are looking for. After all, why would he if he doesn't do it, right? My experience however, says that he will see a problem. Getting constantly questioned (and that is what it feels like) is crap. If you continue thinking that your opinions on this justify any behavior you want, you may end up losing the guy you wanted once you finally find him. Friendly advice.
Author MeaganRaye Posted June 4, 2009 Author Posted June 4, 2009 You think it is ok to destroy someone's property because you don't like the pictures? No, it's not. If ANY woman came on here and said "my boyfriend won't let me look at other men and destroyed a picture I had of some celebrity guys", everyone would scream RUN/abuse/controlling/insecure freak Well, I can't help it. I absolutely HATE when an S/O of mine would look at music videos of girls dancing around, and I HATED all of his pinup mags. It would infuriate me when he would talk about the girls body parts; ass, tits. If you are with somebody and you care about their feelings you wouldn't do those things
wuggle Posted June 4, 2009 Posted June 4, 2009 religiously viewing porn, . Sorry but that just caught my eye, never heard of anyone doing that before. :D:D
Soul Bear Posted June 4, 2009 Posted June 4, 2009 There are men out there who dont do all 3, I consider myself one of them. I was faithful to my ex fiance, I had eyes only for her, I didnt visit strip clubs, and I only looked at porn if she wanted to during the pleasures of sex. So please dont think all guys out there are the same. A majority can be stereotyped, i agree, but we are not all the same. I hope you find your love one day. SoulBear
Thornton Posted June 4, 2009 Posted June 4, 2009 Of the last five guys I dated, I think four of them watched porn occasionally but none of them ever visited strip clubs. I guess they all looked at other women occasionally, but I can't complain because I will look at an attractive man... I think it's fine as long as it's just looking. I can't complain about the porn either, because I like the occasional bit of porn myself. My current bf doesn't go to strip clubs or watch porn, and he's so smitten with me that I don't think he even looks at other women either. Come to think of it, I don't even know a guy who goes to strip clubs... you must be dating some pretty skanky guys if they do that. Perhaps you need to choose who you date more carefully?
wuggle Posted June 4, 2009 Posted June 4, 2009 I think your original statement is likely to turn out to be rubbish. You will be single untill you fall in love, then you will overlook so many faults just like the rest of us. Wait and see...:laugh:
Author MeaganRaye Posted June 4, 2009 Author Posted June 4, 2009 No, I will remain single. I am not the type to fall in love. I don't even date really.
kdark Posted June 4, 2009 Posted June 4, 2009 I think your original statement is likely to turn out to be rubbish. You will be single untill you fall in love, then you will overlook so many faults just like the rest of us. Wait and see...:laugh: This is so true.
wuggle Posted June 4, 2009 Posted June 4, 2009 The world is a strange and wonderful place, wait and see....:laugh:
kdark Posted June 4, 2009 Posted June 4, 2009 No, I will remain single. I am not the type to fall in love. I don't even date really. If you aren't the type to fall in love, then what were you wanting out of a longterm relationship other than falling in love? Keep telling yourself that...
redfathom Posted June 4, 2009 Posted June 4, 2009 You got mad cause your ex looked at music videos which had girls dancing. Does that mean no movies either...like Watchman, Collateral, Die Hard, Star Trek (new). I mean I know from what you are saying my question is hypathetical, but what would you "allow" your BF to watch?
Touche Posted June 4, 2009 Posted June 4, 2009 I agree with the person who said you've been dating low-class guys. Anyway, maybe you're just one of those people who should remain single.
Author MeaganRaye Posted June 4, 2009 Author Posted June 4, 2009 You got mad cause your ex looked at music videos which had girls dancing. Does that mean no movies either...like Watchman, Collateral, Die Hard, Star Trek (new). I mean I know from what you are saying my question is hypathetical, but what would you "allow" your BF to watch? I want a boyfriend who doesnt want to watch those type of things there are certain things about men that I never liked. I hate it when a boyfriend will say "she's the most finest girl I ever seen" and I'm right next to him. I hate that
Bejita463 Posted June 4, 2009 Posted June 4, 2009 I want a boyfriend who doesnt want to watch those type of things there are certain things about men that I never liked. I hate it when a boyfriend will say "she's the most finest girl I ever seen" and I'm right next to him. I hate that What does that have to do with watching Star Trek, aside from the fact that it has women in it, if you have a guy that does not look and you trust that he doesn't? He's supposed to restrict himself because you don't believe that he wouldn't look just because he wants to watch a movie?
Author MeaganRaye Posted June 4, 2009 Author Posted June 4, 2009 What does that have to do with watching Star Trek, aside from the fact that it has women in it, if you have a guy that does not look and you trust that he doesn't? He's supposed to restrict himself because you don't believe that he wouldn't look just because he wants to watch a movie? I don't understand. I just don't like it when a guy I am dating fawns over other women, celebrity women, and talk about how perfect they look. It infuriates me. I would end a relationship on the spot and never speak to him again
wuggle Posted June 4, 2009 Posted June 4, 2009 Sort of agree with Touche, you have probably just been dating lower class men and are basing your opinions of ALL men on these. I wouldn't dream of making the sort of comment you refer to in front of a woman, don't go to strip clubs etc . I think you will find a decent bloke, just don't dismiss us all as creeps based on the few you have dated. You might find you put off the perfect person just by being predjudicial. Not all man are ar**holes.
Bejita463 Posted June 4, 2009 Posted June 4, 2009 I don't understand. I just don't like it when a guy I am dating fawns over other women, celebrity women, and talk about how perfect they look. It infuriates me. I would end a relationship on the spot and never speak to him again My interpretation of your response to the question of "what would you allow him to watch" was that he shouldn't want to watch movies, because you said it in response to innocent examples of movies.
Author MeaganRaye Posted June 4, 2009 Author Posted June 4, 2009 I used to have a natural and crazy desire to want to be coupled up with somebody. I wanted a boyfriend so bad that I would cry everynight about it Now, I really couldn't care less about wanting a man, I've become so numb to wanting to form a bond with anybody. I just don't care anymore. It's been that way for awhile now. Lately, I just don't want to be bothered. I'm using to beiing alone and focusing all the attention on myself when I can. I don't have to worry about somebody letting me down or disappointing me using me or anything like that
fishtaco Posted June 4, 2009 Posted June 4, 2009 Nah, just remain single, if you think that's right for you. Although my bet is with wuggle. When the time comes, you'll get into a relationship anyway.
redfathom Posted June 4, 2009 Posted June 4, 2009 I agree with Touche who says you dated losers. Any guy who talks about how "fine" some other woman is while you are in the vicinity is being rude. Unless it's a general discussion and you're involved in the conversation. But realize this, just because a man says he finds another woman pretty doesn't mean you are any less beautiful to them. If I admire a corvette, it doesn't mean I don't like my car. Nor does it mean if, on the slight chance I could have one, that I would give up my car for it. It could be more maintenance, and I wouldn't want that. Sorry to compare woman to cars....
Trialbyfire Posted June 5, 2009 Posted June 5, 2009 I used to have a natural and crazy desire to want to be coupled up with somebody. I wanted a boyfriend so bad that I would cry everynight about it Now, I really couldn't care less about wanting a man, I've become so numb to wanting to form a bond with anybody. I just don't care anymore. It's been that way for awhile now. Lately, I just don't want to be bothered. I'm using to beiing alone and focusing all the attention on myself when I can. I don't have to worry about somebody letting me down or disappointing me using me or anything like thatThrashing around, throwing tantrums and accusing men of being evil monsters, while wanting to be the thought police, isn't going to get you a healthy partner. I suspect you've had some disappointments in life, starting from your family life. Isn't it time to grow up a little and realize that healthy coping tools work better than unhealthy ones?
stefspets Posted June 5, 2009 Posted June 5, 2009 I want a boyfriend who doesnt want to watch those type of things there are certain things about men that I never liked. I hate it when a boyfriend will say "she's the most finest girl I ever seen" and I'm right next to him. I hate that I would hate that too. He should say "She's the finest girl I've ever seen." I'd dump him right then for his bad grammar. Seriously though, there are guys out there that don't do this stuff, but you're never going to find one if you don't figure out how to cope with your insecurities.
Author MeaganRaye Posted June 5, 2009 Author Posted June 5, 2009 Thrashing around, throwing tantrums and accusing men of being evil monsters, while wanting to be the thought police, isn't going to get you a healthy partner. I suspect you've had some disappointments in life, starting from your family life. Isn't it time to grow up a little and realize that healthy coping tools work better than unhealthy ones? Staying away from relationship= healthy coping tools I can't help the world I am stuck in. But a lot of the men I'm around, make me want to be single forever.
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