SAM619_ssc Posted June 4, 2009 Posted June 4, 2009 Hi I'm 18, male and I'm seeking anyones help. When I'm with my friends, I'm funny, confident and can talk about anything. But there's a girl that I really like in my college, who is probably the most attractive girl ive met, but I haven't talked to her, but I really want to. Even though I haven't spoke to her I know that she is really nice and quite shy. I would love to get to know her but everytime I go to speak to her my mind goes blank and I don't know what to say. I get really quiet when I see her, and I don't want to. How can I get over this and make see that I'm a nice person and not someone who doesnt speak to her?
oscakool Posted June 4, 2009 Posted June 4, 2009 It's a fact that people that are trying to think of something to say have some deeper issues. Look, I could sit here and give you a million things to say that would get the conversation going, but that wouldn't come off as real to her because you'd be reading from a script. There is a solution, however. The first step is to start appreciating your surroundings. You see that pretty bird on the wall? Comment on it. Appreciate it. See that nice car? Comment on it. See that girl wearing awesome shoes? "Wow your shoes are totally awesome, they look great on you!" etc. etc. I used to be the same way man, trying to think of things to say. It all came down to the fact that I didn't appreciate anything. So take my advice, start appreciating what you have and your life, and you'll have no conversation problems whatsoever.
BCCA Posted June 4, 2009 Posted June 4, 2009 The easiest way to get over this is the next time you see her, just walk up and say hi. Dont think of any clever lines, or opening comments, just go. When you sit there thinking you pshyce yourself out, and then nothing is going to come to mind. When you just go for it, and you live in the moment, things just come out naturally. Next time you see her, walk up and say hi, immediately.
Author SAM619_ssc Posted June 5, 2009 Author Posted June 5, 2009 Thanks guys, I will use this advice when I see her. I was also wondering how you talk to beautiful women like a friend, without thinking of how beautiful she is, or there's a possibility of going out with her, because these are the thoughts that make my mind go blank. Is there any way to block this out of your mind??
lifereversal Posted June 5, 2009 Posted June 5, 2009 Thanks guys, I will use this advice when I see her. I was also wondering how you talk to beautiful women like a friend, without thinking of how beautiful she is, or there's a possibility of going out with her, because these are the thoughts that make my mind go blank. Is there any way to block this out of your mind?? I find I'm at my best when I'm uninterested where I want it to go or where it's going or if she likes me. Just go with the flow and see where it leads. Walk blind and your true colours will come out. Like BCCA said, you try to come up with clever lines, you'll only make yourself trip. Now walk blind and stop caring all together to where it will go.
lazlow99 Posted June 5, 2009 Posted June 5, 2009 I find I'm at my best when I'm uninterested where I want it to go or where it's going or if she likes me. Yeah thats true, I can talk forever if I'm not conscious about what I'm saying. By thinking about the conversation all you're doing is stopping yourself. But also bare in mind that it takes time to get to know people and be casual with them, so don't put too much pressure on yourself to ''talk naturally'' or whatever. Its a cliche but just be yourself. Also its easier to talk in certain situations, like in a class for example because its a common ground and you can talk about the lecturer, subject, anything. If you approach her on the street its more pressure on you because it might be out of a comfort zone.
Author SAM619_ssc Posted June 5, 2009 Author Posted June 5, 2009 Thanks for your help, what do you guys think of when talking to a beautiful girl, because all I can think is how beautiful she is and how I want to go out with her, got any tricks?
lora22 Posted June 5, 2009 Posted June 5, 2009 Thanks for your help, what do you guys think of when talking to a beautiful girl, because all I can think is how beautiful she is and how I want to go out with her, got any tricks? Everybody poops. I mean, I'm a girl, but if someone intimidates me, or I start thinking that someone's "better" or more desirable than me in some way that works for me.
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