GorillaTheater Posted June 15, 2009 Posted June 15, 2009 Chalk it up as a loss and move on. There IS such a thing as playing TOO "hard to get".
Author asuman Posted June 15, 2009 Author Posted June 15, 2009 Chalk it up as a loss and move on. There IS such a thing as playing TOO "hard to get". Shouldn't I at least attempt to get a clear answer at some point? I can take getting shot down if that's where this is headed. She's never actually said no to going out with me again and we haven't talked on the phone since our last date, which went well. I called once and that was it. She sent me an email here and a text there since but I didn't want to push things with multiple phonecalls so I backed off.
Cloudberry Posted June 15, 2009 Posted June 15, 2009 Asuman: I wonder if your girlfriend has read "The Rules".... It kind of sounds like she might have read that ridiculous book. By the way, the authors are divorced now.
Author asuman Posted June 15, 2009 Author Posted June 15, 2009 Asuman: I wonder if your girlfriend has read "The Rules".... It kind of sounds like she might have read that ridiculous book. By the way, the authors are divorced now. I've wondered the same thing from the start.
Cloudberry Posted June 15, 2009 Posted June 15, 2009 I read "The Rules" too. It isn't 100% crap, but close, about 90%. It's written for women who chronically throw themselves on men and act really pushy and act like needy psychos. Women like those would benefit from reading The Rules, but for the rest of us, it's a bit too extreme.
Author asuman Posted June 15, 2009 Author Posted June 15, 2009 I read "The Rules" too. It isn't 100% crap, but close, about 90%. It's written for women who chronically throw themselves on men and act really pushy and act like needy psychos. Women like those would benefit from reading The Rules, but for the rest of us, it's a bit too extreme. She's either read them (and follows them) or she's nuts. Her behavior given our very last date makes NO sense. Our very last moment together was in my car to drop her off. She stayed put and talked to me for another 30 minutes. (Which was weird). Then she said she should go. I looked at her and we started kissing. She took her hand and began touching my neck with it. The car was awkward so I couldn't do much, but I did simply rest my hand on her leg, and with my other hand I caressed her shoulder. We kissed for about 2 to 3 minutes. Lots of frenching. That was the last time I so much as spoke to her! This is driving me insane.
Author asuman Posted June 20, 2009 Author Posted June 20, 2009 Update Time. Me (after some small talk): Hey. So, it's been a while since we've seen each other and I like going out with you, but I wasn't sure where things stood, so... do you want me to keep asking you out? Her: I think you're a great guy and I've enjoyed the time we've spent together, but I don't see it turning into a long-term thing. Me: Ok. Well, I appreciate your being direct with me. Blah blah blah (me being strong in the face of rejection) blah blah blah it was great getting to know you anyway yada yada yada. Her: I feel the same way and if you want we can definitely hang out together as friends. And I apologize for being incommunicado for so long but I've really just been swamped at work. Me: Well, to be honest with you since we're putting it all out there, I'd kind of begun to develop feelings for you. So maybe some day in the future we could be friends but for the time being you probably won't hear from me for a while. Her: Ok, that sounds like a really good plan. Me: Cool. Bye.
sailing Posted June 20, 2009 Posted June 20, 2009 Oh no - sorry asuman! But I admire your way of handling that last conversation.
stace79 Posted June 24, 2009 Posted June 24, 2009 makes me wonder if I need to question why I'm so anxious and why I can't just chill out and enjoy the relationship (or whatever you would call this). If I could just chill out and enjoy, I would be fine with this to see where it ends up. Echoing another poster, answering WHY you can't "chill out and enjoy the relationship" isn't going to change things. For whatever reason, you aren't really enjoying it all around. It will only get harder. I'd recommend cutting the cord now, before you really get too invested and it's that much harder to break up.
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