Author xpaperxcutx Posted June 2, 2009 Author Posted June 2, 2009 Ha, in another post you claimed you didn't know these were dates. You said you were just 'hanging out'. Make up your mind! hanging out with musician guy. I see a date as having dinner, and nice conversations. whats your definition of a date?
Soul Bear Posted June 2, 2009 Posted June 2, 2009 Hey...come on...take it easy on her. No one posts for attention on here, its all because they need help. I can understand where paperchase is coming from. I think you guys need to cut her a bit of slack. Try and be a little more mature and supportive, empathetic etc. Ive had my fair share of people being nasty to me on here, and its not nice. Im sure you guys wouldnt like it either. So please apologise to her and try to offer her some constructive advice
carhill Posted June 2, 2009 Posted June 2, 2009 For the record, the lawyer I'm talking about is V and only V, in this instance. OP, topically, what do you want next? V is going to go away now, and artist guy is done too, correct? What have you learned here? It really makes those who support you happy to see you succeed and find happiness in relationships. Is that what you want? IMO, I'd suggest taking a break and re-reading your very well-attended threads of late. There's a lot of really good information in them. That's dad's advice
Star Gazer Posted June 2, 2009 Posted June 2, 2009 And I don't expect you to turn into me Dreamer, you have enough problems as is. They PALE in comparison.
Soul Bear Posted June 2, 2009 Posted June 2, 2009 I like you Soul Bear Thankyou Your part of a minority on here!!
Author xpaperxcutx Posted June 2, 2009 Author Posted June 2, 2009 Hey...come on...take it easy on her. No one posts for attention on here, its all because they need help. I can understand where paperchase is coming from. I think you guys need to cut her a bit of slack. Try and be a little more mature and supportive, empathetic etc. Ive had my fair share of people being nasty to me on here, and its not nice. Im sure you guys wouldnt like it either. So please apologise to her and try to offer her some constructive advice That's okay Soul Bear, I don't really want it. I just hate how people can accuse someone of being liars, yet still read everything on this forum. I'm not a liar, why would I want to make something up for 6 pages long just to get a rise out of people? All I do know is sometimes I do write inconsistently and I apologize for the confusion.
clv0116 Posted June 2, 2009 Posted June 2, 2009 hanging out with musician guy. I see a date as having dinner, and nice conversations. whats your definition of a date? Typically a date is two or more people meeting at a predetermined time and location.
dreamergrl Posted June 2, 2009 Posted June 2, 2009 Hey...come on...take it easy on her. No one posts for attention on here, its all because they need help. I can understand where paperchase is coming from. I think you guys need to cut her a bit of slack. Try and be a little more mature and supportive, empathetic etc. Ive had my fair share of people being nasty to me on here, and its not nice. Im sure you guys wouldnt like it either. So please apologise to her and try to offer her some constructive advice Do you have any idea how many people have tried this? When someone who is always posting about an issue, but never is willing to take fault for any situation they put themselves into, it gets tiring. I know I may post about the same issues here and there, but I know when I've done wrong, and am willing to listen to advice to fix the problem. Here there will be no fixing of the problem because she is unwilling to take any advice given, nor accept her part in the matter.
dreamergrl Posted June 2, 2009 Posted June 2, 2009 That's okay Soul Bear, I don't really want it. I just hate how people can accuse someone of being liars, yet still read everything on this forum. I'm not a liar, why would I want to make something up for 6 pages long just to get a rise out of people? All I do know is sometimes I do write inconsistently and I apologize for the confusion. You see, she does not want the advice. She wants sympathy. There's only so much of that for someone who continues to damage themselves.
Star Gazer Posted June 2, 2009 Posted June 2, 2009 Hey...come on...take it easy on her. No one posts for attention on here, You're new, so I don't blame you for thinking this. But you're wrong, Paper does post for validation and attention. She's admitted as much (and then later takes it back, of course). So please apologise to her and try to offer her some constructive advice We have, in about, oh, 20 or so threads. She does not listen.
Author xpaperxcutx Posted June 2, 2009 Author Posted June 2, 2009 For the record, the lawyer I'm talking about is V and only V, in this instance. OP, topically, what do you want next? V is going to go away now, and artist guy is done too, correct? What have you learned here? It really makes those who support you happy to see you succeed and find happiness in relationships. Is that what you want? IMO, I'd suggest taking a break and re-reading your very well-attended threads of late. There's a lot of really good information in them. That's dad's advice Dear dad, Well I am actually on a break, hence why I spend the weekend alone. I learned I need not to be so passive and speak my mind more as opposed to letting people take advantage of me. I'm not troubled, merely lacking guidance in how to pursue a healthy relationship. Of course not everyone will believe me when I say I'm dateless, because they accuse me of being a liar. I'm not a whore, or a prostitute, and neither should I consider myself promiscuous for having slept with ONE person outside of a relationship. I also learned LS can be a downer because everyone's harsh on everyone else just so they can feel better about themselves.
Author xpaperxcutx Posted June 2, 2009 Author Posted June 2, 2009 Typically a date is two or more people meeting at a predetermined time and location. That's to general. I can also make a date with my friends who hang out in groups of twos and threes, and we meet at a predetermined time and location.
Star Gazer Posted June 2, 2009 Posted June 2, 2009 I also learned LS can be a downer because everyone's harsh on everyone else just so they can feel better about themselves. Not at all. I, for one, am happier than I've ever been. I've just lost a lot of patience for utter nonsense.
dreamergrl Posted June 2, 2009 Posted June 2, 2009 I've just lost a lot of patience for utter nonsense. So, if I put my head in a doorway, and asked you to slam the door, you'd understand?
Soul Bear Posted June 2, 2009 Posted June 2, 2009 I say this with all due respect, There is a big difference between EMPATHY and SYMPATHY. There is CONSTRUCTIVE and DESTRUCTIVE advice. Your Jobs, as 'LS Gurus' or whatever you want to call yourselfs should be to help. You need to build people up, a delicate combination between the Iron Fist and the Velvet Glove
Star Gazer Posted June 2, 2009 Posted June 2, 2009 So, if I put my head in a doorway, and asked you to slam the door, you'd understand? Absolutely. I have already done the same thing, and have the bruises to show for it. Oh well.
Author xpaperxcutx Posted June 2, 2009 Author Posted June 2, 2009 You see, she does not want the advice. She wants sympathy. There's only so much of that for someone who continues to damage themselves. Sympathy? I merely wrote that this guy is texting me out of the blue and people bring up my promiscuity? and how I'm a liar. I never said I didn't take anybody's advice, I'm not dating, and I haven't contacted Artist guy. So how exactly am I "damaging" myself?
dreamergrl Posted June 2, 2009 Posted June 2, 2009 I say this with all due respect, There is a big difference between EMPATHY and SYMPATHY. There is CONSTRUCTIVE and DESTRUCTIVE advice. Your Jobs, as 'LS Gurus' or whatever you want to call yourselfs should be to help. You need to build people up, a delicate combination between the Iron Fist and the Velvet Glove In all honestly, I think Paper doesn't need anyone to build her up. She wants to play the naive, but really, what girl in this day and age would not think a guy asking her over on a first date isn't interested? Further more, she goes out and 'meets' guys only because she doesn't want to stay at home (this is from her own post and her own words). Paper knows what she is doing. She doesn't want to tell these guys she's not interested because then the attention stops. Hence when the last guy said it was a date, she laughed, instead of looking him in the face and saying it's not so.
carhill Posted June 2, 2009 Posted June 2, 2009 I also learned LS can be a downer because everyone's harsh on everyone else just so they can feel better about themselves. If that is how you feel, IMO it's time to push away and take a break here. Just like IRL, you aren't forgotten, merely missed
BCCA Posted June 2, 2009 Posted June 2, 2009 I say this with all due respect, There is a big difference between EMPATHY and SYMPATHY. There is CONSTRUCTIVE and DESTRUCTIVE advice. Your Jobs, as 'LS Gurus' or whatever you want to call yourselfs should be to help. You need to build people up, a delicate combination between the Iron Fist and the Velvet Glove We all started where you are, trust me. I try and be nice, even to those who dont deserve it. After about 15 more threads that are almost identical, and pages of posts that change with the winds, it gets old. Its like a friend who keeps asking you for the same advice over and over, and then doesnt take any of it, yet wants to come cry on your shoulder. Sooner or later, you've had enough. Seriously, the part that bothers me the most is that shes dishonest, both with us and herself. I honestly have a hard time believing this V guy even exists, and Im a very trusting person. THATS how bad its gotten.
clv0116 Posted June 2, 2009 Posted June 2, 2009 That's to general. I can also make a date with my friends who hang out in groups of twos and threes, and we meet at a predetermined time and location. Yup that's a date. Enjoy!
Star Gazer Posted June 2, 2009 Posted June 2, 2009 I honestly have a hard time believing this V guy even exists, and Im a very trusting person. THATS how bad its gotten. Me too, particularly because this "date" (or "not date," depending on the day) went from planning to have sushi at his place while watching to Bocelli, to meeting him at Barnes & Noble and having him ask her if he wanted to see the pool. Those who lie often can't keep their stories straight.
BobSacamento Posted June 3, 2009 Posted June 3, 2009 Further more, she goes out and 'meets' guys only because she doesn't want to stay at home (this is from her own post and her own words). What's wrong with that? She's like a female bachelor. A bachelorette if you will haha. Some people just want to go out and have fun and met new people. Treating dating as being fun not so super serious. Other people think in terms of - how is this going to lead to a serious relationship and ultimately marriage with every date. Also, it seems like this type of thinking is extremely intolerant of any other dating. But I won't name any names. So really I find it extremely difficult for Paper to listen to some posters advice considering their main objectives seem completely different.
Author xpaperxcutx Posted June 3, 2009 Author Posted June 3, 2009 What's wrong with that? She's like a female bachelor. A bachelorette if you will haha. Some people just want to go out and have fun and met new people. Treating dating as being fun not so super serious. Other people think in terms of - how is this going to lead to a serious relationship and ultimately marriage with every date. Also, it seems like this type of thinking is extremely intolerant of any other dating. But I won't name any names. So really I find it extremely difficult for Paper to listen to some posters advice considering their main objectives seem completely different. Once again, Bob, you get me. The only reason, I started getting emotional was because I fell for a guy who was suppose to be a casual date, nothing more nothing less. And I had gotten myself entangled with him when I should be more carefree about my dating situation. Honestly, when I started dating after my ex, I really wasn't looking for anything serious. That's why it had been sooo easy for me detach emotionally and act so immaturely. But I allowed one guy to get to me which ruined everything else with everyone else. Hence, here I am, on a break. Bob, you're one smart aleck
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