jinx7 Posted June 1, 2009 Posted June 1, 2009 hi about 6 weeks ago my first love and i broke up. She finished it, and the reason she did so was because she has personal problems such as anorexia and self acceptance issues. We had been going out for over a year and had been getting on great, so obviously i was really shocked. Sometimes when we were together she would have days where her problems really got her down and she would lasho out at everyone around her, including me at times. I love her to bits, so obviously i want to try and fix thingd with her. She has started texting me ever so often, and from the way she has been acting i think she may have decided she wants to give it another go, but she wants me to bring it up. Im too scared to do this though becuase when we first broke up i tried to get back together with ger and she freaked out and pushed me away a bit. However, recently she has told a mutual friend she regrets breaking up with me, and i met one of her friends at the pub and i was drunk and basically told him how much i missed her and wanted to fix things with her, and then the next day she started text me, and i think she maybe wanted to see if i would say those things to her, but i was too scared too. Before we broke up, things were really good between us apart from her problems, and i was looking through old texts and there was so many that said things like "i love you so much" and "you're the best person ive evre met", and a couple that were just "<3", and that was all in the week bfore we broke up. So, im very confused, and any advice would be greatly appreciated. Im not sure if i should wait for her to say to me or if i should do the running
SoulSearch_CO Posted June 1, 2009 Posted June 1, 2009 Well, I would sure hope that one condition of getting back together would be her getting into counseling. Otherwise, we're going to be hearing your heartbreak story in another couple months when she flips out again.
Author jinx7 Posted June 1, 2009 Author Posted June 1, 2009 im just wondering, how much of an affect does an eating disorder have on someones mind? how serious is it from a physchological point of view?
xpaperxcutx Posted June 1, 2009 Posted June 1, 2009 im just wondering, how much of an affect does an eating disorder have on someones mind? how serious is it from a physchological point of view? Enough to make you feel completely tortured. She will always have the disease until she can learn to love herself, and because she doesn't love her body, everything that people tell her will be lies. So no matter how beautiful you think she is, she will always be disgusted with her herself. And everyday is like a battle on whether she had gained or lost a pound. Having you in her life is merely making it worse. She's only using you as a crutch for herself away from her illness. I did it with my ex, even tho he told me constantly I was beautiful, I didn't believe him.
Author jinx7 Posted June 1, 2009 Author Posted June 1, 2009 what do you mean when you say "a crutch"? thanks for your help btw
Author jinx7 Posted June 4, 2009 Author Posted June 4, 2009 does anyone else have any advice or experience of a situation like this? could really use your help guys thanks
oscakool Posted June 4, 2009 Posted June 4, 2009 Yea what you want to do is her give some time apart to get her problems fixed. Be her friend, just don't date her right now. Tell her "I love you and want to be with you, but you've got to get your other problems handled right now. I'll be here for you while you get them fixed." Or something like that. The point is that you don't want to date someone that has bigger issues going on (anorexia kills people all the time). But be her friend, she needs someone there to help her out.
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