mortensorchid Posted May 30, 2009 Posted May 30, 2009 I am 34 years old. I look very good, if I do say so myself, compared to other women my age, a bit older, and a bit younger (as well as many quite a bit older or younger than me), in that I have kept my weight down, keep my skin clear, dress nicely. I'm not a movie star, I'm not a model. And yet, I've been feeling more and more like I have missed the boat in life somehow. I do not sit around and say "Whoa is me, I have no man so I'm worthless". People have begun to ask my parents a lot why I am not married and why I don't even have a boyfriend. (As to what they say, I'm not sure to that.) Quite honestly, it's becoming rather embarrassing, especially as I see the things out there. I guess I am starting to think that I am too old. I know age 34 is not old by any means, but I am starting to think that I really missed the boat. At some point, everyone made choices when I wasn't looking and I am suddenly looking around like "Where did everybody go?" Has anyone else ever thought that?
tigerstripes Posted May 30, 2009 Posted May 30, 2009 What have you been focusing on instead of dating...career? education? kids?
Jilly Bean Posted May 30, 2009 Posted May 30, 2009 It's time for your final voyage to the Isle of Elder Vagine, Mort. http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t162045/?highlight=forelorn
OpenBook Posted May 30, 2009 Posted May 30, 2009 It's time for your final voyage to the Isle of Elder Vagine, Mort. :lmao: I'll be the ancient old crone, stirring the cauldron behind that coconut tree... way over on the left over there.
Jilly Bean Posted May 30, 2009 Posted May 30, 2009 :lmao: I'll be the ancient old crone, stirring the cauldron behind that coconut tree... way over on the left over there. You'll be in very good company, Open. We are all crones past 28.
xpaperxcutx Posted May 30, 2009 Posted May 30, 2009 You'll be in very good company, Open. We are all crones past 28. So that'll only give me 9 more years to make something of myself?!!!
Jilly Bean Posted May 30, 2009 Posted May 30, 2009 So that'll only give me 9 more years to make something of myself?!!! Give or take, yes. Read the thread, X. We all have a very limited shelf-life.
Kamille Posted May 30, 2009 Posted May 30, 2009 It's time for your final voyage to the Isle of Elder Vagine, Mort. http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t162045/?highlight=forelorn A classic thread! How are you doing Jilly? It's been awhile. Mort, I'm 33. I can relate to how you feel for having felt like that in the past, especially after dealing with a break-up. Lately though, I feel like one of the luckiest people on earth for all that I've gotten to do already, travel, career, friends and love wise.
tigerstripes Posted May 31, 2009 Posted May 31, 2009 lol that was a good thread (I'll admit I didn't read all 20-something pages) I've packed my bags and I'm ready to ship off. Can we bring our lonely old lady cats to said island? In all seriousness, I do agree with Kamille (somewhat). I feel very privelaged for the career, education, and lifestyle that I've been fortunate enough to have due to my lack of husband/children. I can't say that I feel like I've been lucky in love and that sucks. I'll have my own little pity party over here. But I know a lot of women far older than I who are now looking at empty nests, realizing that they had no life outside of raising their kids, and just feel empty.
jerbear Posted May 31, 2009 Posted May 31, 2009 I don't think 34 is old or even 33. I think the 30's and early 40's are just fine. I don't get why women in their 30's get into the missing love, think they'll die alone (they probably will anyway but that is another point), turn to the cat lady, etc... I still like that thread, it was interesting. :cool:
Kamille Posted May 31, 2009 Posted May 31, 2009 I don't get why women in their 30's get into the missing love, think they'll die alone (they probably will anyway but that is another point), turn to the cat lady, etc... You mean in that men die earlier then women kind of way? Honestly, I also think most people die alone. It's aging alone that seems scary. That's why I'm investing in good friendships.
tigerstripes Posted May 31, 2009 Posted May 31, 2009 I don't get why women in their 30's get into the missing love, think they'll die alone ... 1. I'm the only single woman over 30 that I know. 2. I can't date guys in their 20s because they're in a different "place" in their lives. And emotionally healthy single guys in their 30s are not so easy to find.
Kamille Posted May 31, 2009 Posted May 31, 2009 1. I'm the only single woman over 30 that I know. 2. I can't date guys in their 20s because they're in a different "place" in their lives. And emotionally healthy single guys in their 30s are not so easy to find. But fortunately healthy divorced 40 years olds are :love:!
tigerstripes Posted May 31, 2009 Posted May 31, 2009 Awesome! So I'll look forward to having a relationship 10 years from now
Kamille Posted May 31, 2009 Posted May 31, 2009 Awesome! So I'll look forward to having a relationship 10 years from now What's wrong with dating a 40 year old now? That's what I'm doing and I give it two thumbs up!
Peter_pan Posted May 31, 2009 Posted May 31, 2009 do you have a photo? right well i am male 21 yr old. and this is my opinion, if i were a 34 yr old female i would imagine it is hard to find a guy around similar age who is single and attractive. id imagine there are so many guys that let them selfs go. i am not going to be one of them. i want to keep myself in shape for as long as i can. i look great now and hopefully can only get better. i am hoping i dont grow old in life on my own. but at the same time ive got good friends and family. i say get out as much as possible and bag urself a good looking fella
Jilly Bean Posted May 31, 2009 Posted May 31, 2009 A classic thread! How are you doing Jilly? It's been awhile. Mort, I'm 33. I can relate to how you feel for having felt like that in the past, especially after dealing with a break-up. Lately though, I feel like one of the luckiest people on earth for all that I've gotten to do already, travel, career, friends and love wise. Hey, K! How are you, hon? I'm doing well, thanks. I loved that thread. It took off in such an odd direction, but was so much fun. Man, did we milk that topic... lol There is so much more to life than being in a relationship. It's not the end all, be all for everyone, and keeping your life full in other areas can be just as, if not more, fulfilling and satisfying.
tigerstripes Posted May 31, 2009 Posted May 31, 2009 There's nothing wrong with it. I would not feel comfortable with the age difference personally but if it works for you, all the power to ya
xpaperxcutx Posted May 31, 2009 Posted May 31, 2009 do you have a photo? right well i am male 21 yr old. and this is my opinion, if i were a 34 yr old female i would imagine it is hard to find a guy around similar age who is single and attractive. id imagine there are so many guys that let them selfs go. i am not going to be one of them. i want to keep myself in shape for as long as i can. i look great now and hopefully can only get better. i am hoping i dont grow old in life on my own. but at the same time ive got good friends and family. i say get out as much as possible and bag urself a good looking fella Oh no I disagree, some of them are pretty fit. It's the fact that they're balding that's hard to fight off.
tigerstripes Posted May 31, 2009 Posted May 31, 2009 Oh no I disagree, some of them are pretty fit. It's the fact that they're balding that's hard to fight off. the nice thing about women over 30 is that they've already dated the "hot guys" and found out they weren't good for much. So we've figured out that looks don't matter much by this time.
xpaperxcutx Posted May 31, 2009 Posted May 31, 2009 the nice thing about women over 30 is that they've already dated the "hot guys" and found out they weren't good for much. So we've figured out that looks don't matter much by this time. I can think of someone over the age of 30 who would disagree with this.
Kamille Posted May 31, 2009 Posted May 31, 2009 There's nothing wrong with it. I would not feel comfortable with the age difference personally but if it works for you, all the power to ya Seriously, I've never been treated so well. This guy doesn't have the insecurities that men who are younger or my age have. I'm really loving it. So yes, I will keep enjoying! I'm curious. Are you over 30? And you still feel like there is a big age difference between you and someone who is 40?
Thornton Posted May 31, 2009 Posted May 31, 2009 I am 30 in a few months and my bf is 40 next year. Having said that, he is fitter and better looking than some of the 30 year olds I know! When I met him I actually thought he was around 30 anyway; he isn't overweight or balding, doesn't have too many wrinkles, etc. I admit that some 40 year olds behave like pensioners and wouldn't be suitable for me at all, but my bf looks and acts young and we get along fine. So don't discount all 40 year olds just because you don't like the look of some of them, i.e. the ones who didn't take care of themselves.
Author mortensorchid Posted May 31, 2009 Author Posted May 31, 2009 I'm glad this thread has inspired so many. Well, I'm here to tell you that I have had a lot of good things in life that I do not regret in the slightest. I've gotten to travel, I have left a miserable career behind and I'm launching into a new one (going back to college the second time around post bacc is a challenge, but it makes me happier than I have been in a very long time). I have a lot of friends, an active social life, good relationship with my parents. It's all good. But, for some reason, I cannot get it together when it comes to love. I've been with my share of losers in the past of course, but I can usually smell out a loser when they present themselves to me. Unfortunately, that's all there seem to be out there. Nothing but, and I won't give them the time of day. Well, maybe one, but that's another story I won't get into here. Ha ha ha ... I've tried just about everything I can think of, and ... it just doesn't pan out. I have been burned countless times, and I feel like I am just done with it. The only solution, as they say, is to find someone else (or get under someone else, if not temporarily). But, there's no one. I feel alone much of the time, but if this is how it has to be, I guess I have no choice.
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