CandyGirlXO Posted May 29, 2009 Posted May 29, 2009 I don't know what to do, I guess I am just having a bad night and I need someone to talk to. I have been feeling so insecure lately and I just don't know how to stop. I have been with my BF for 5 months now, and things are decent. I really feel like this could last but my insecurities are getting to me. I know its stupid, and I need to just snap out of it, but I can't. I feel a lot of the times like I am not "good enough" as far as just my looks etc... I often feel not pretty enough. He sometimes points girls out that are pretty, which I don't mind, because of course I look too, but then I start obsessing about my legs, or stomach, or whatever else it is. He tells me I am pretty and I know he is attracted to me, I know its my own issue. Here is the problem... I did implants about 2 years ago, and at first I loved them thougt they were great. But now that I have had them a while, I often regret my decision. Sometimes I feel like I went too big and I don't like the way I look in certain tops, nor can I wear the little tanks I used to. Also I went from wearing a size small ALL the time, to basically having to wear a medium ALL the time. Just today I bought a tank top, and it needed to be a large... just because of my boobs. I feel like he would have liked it better if I stayed my natural B cup. I just felt like they were saggy, and I wanted them to be perky. Another thing about my looks is that I am about to get braces, I have always wanted to get my teeth fixed, but grew up poor. I finally saved up enough money to get braces and of course I am excited, but I am scared all at the sametime. I am mid/late twenties and I just think I will look so bad. I already look like I am 17, so the braces will not help me at all. I know I will feel so ugly. Besides the looks I am insecure about a lot of other things. My family is dysfunctional, I feel like no one in their right mind would want to get involved with me. Trust me.... its bad. One more thing that I can't seem to get past is that right before my BF and I became official he had this FWB that I met a few times just all going out. She is really pretty, sweet, and is friends it seems like with pretty much all of his friends and a lot of his family members. I feel like why did he chose me and not her? I just don't get it. I have asked him before and he said she was a lot of drama and immature, but believe me my family life is a lot of drama, he just doesn't fully know all the details. So I am just so confused. I can't help but think that he would be better off/happier with her. I feel like one day he might regret choosing me over her. I just don't understand why he choose me. I just get confused. I try not to read too much into anything, but we have been together for 5 months, and we still have not said I love you. Now I know those words should not be thrown around, but I feel like there is something wrong with me if he hasn't said it by now. Anyone advice?!?!?!?
missdependant Posted May 29, 2009 Posted May 29, 2009 You could look like Catherine Zeta-Jones and still be insecure. I don't know how people overcome insecurity, but can say I was very insecure at one time. I think I started feeling better about myself when I was able to start seeing positive qualities in others.. whether it was inside or outside. I also started thinking more about what good qualities I have that don't involve physical appearance. Getting comfortable in your own skin starts with seeing more than what's in the mirror. As for the braces, they have a lot of new options for them now. There are clear ones, I don't know what they're called.. but you can't even see them. Maybe that would be an option for you? Also for the boob job.. maybe you can look into having them made smaller? Or possibly have them removed and just get a lift instead? I'm not a big supporter of plastic surgery, but hopefully these might be helpful suggestions. Him not saying I love you might be an issue with him feeling shy.. how intimate would you say you are? Is your relationship more sexual or is there a fair amount of intimacy? Maybe you could try and do things that are more intimate. His love for you will not come from your physical appearance.. It would come from how he feels about you as a person.
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