newshound Posted May 28, 2009 Posted May 28, 2009 There's a bartender at a place at which I've become a regular; I really like her. Last time I was there, she waited on me. When I signed the check, I also left my business card with a note on the back of it, telling her that I liked her and asking her out -- my phone and email address were on the other side. I haven't heard back, and at this point I realize she probably won't call or email me. Now my question is: Is it ok for me to go back there? I realize there is a 99.998% chance she got the note, decided she wasn't interested, and that's that. And that's cool, but I want to go back there because: * I really like it there, even though I realize that dating this particular waitress is unlikely at best. * I figure there's a .001% chance that she just didn't get the note (another bartender picked up the receipt or whatever). * I also figure there's a .001% chance that she does like me and just hasn't had a chance to call. So, my thinking is that I will keep going back -- at least once. If doesn't say anything about it, I could just ask if she got it -- and understand that she's likely just not interested, and that's fine I won't bring it up again. If she does bring it up, I could politely accept her declining and won't bring it up again. And regardless, get my usual dinner there and watch the ball game. Does that sound reasonable? I just don't want to be a stalker or make her uncomfortable.
start-fresh Posted May 28, 2009 Posted May 28, 2009 I personally wouldn't even bring it up. You like the bar so just for the atmosphere and act like nothing happened. You're right she would have called if she was interested. You probably realize this but bartenders get hit on all the time. You would have to really stand out to have much of a chance and asking her out with a note probably didn't do that, unfortunately.
lora22 Posted May 29, 2009 Posted May 29, 2009 speaking as a former bartender...ditto on what amistad said.
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