Bejita463 Posted May 28, 2009 Posted May 28, 2009 Do you not think that if that note got into the wrong hands it could ruin his life? Its a realistic picture when written in black in white. There was a teacher my senior year who flirted with a girl and she tried to "quietly" get his attention. He killed himself after the media and his family found out. A simple note can lead to disaster. Sop yes her approaching him could ruin his life. I'd like to see a copy of that story.
Untouchable_Fire Posted May 29, 2009 Posted May 29, 2009 Thanks for your advice i heard the rumour that he might go to another school after this school year. so then it would be totally normal if we had contact. i know i sound naive but i cant help if i hardly if ever can get along with a guy my age. I just want to second the advice PrettyBaby is giving. She is very wise and worth paying attention to!
JLee26 Posted May 29, 2009 Posted May 29, 2009 I'd like to see a copy of that story. You think i'm kidding huh? Butler Area Senior High School Butler PA class of 2001. LOOK IT UP. It was his first year teaching and he was a track coach for the girls varsity track team. She was a senior in high school. A few notes were passed, another student found out. That student (rightfully so) went to a guidance counselor because he knew what was happening was wrong. The GC called in the student, then the School Superintendent called in the teacher, the entire track team was questioned. Parents found out, media circus began. Students blamed the girl for getting the teacher in trouble (he was well liked) she had to drop out of school. He committed suicide at his parents house shortly after the incident became known. So YES a note can ruin a life. Anymore dumb questions you'd like to ask or do you feel enough like an *sshole already? I honestly can believe some of you condone this. I am willing to bet if he was hitting on her not vice versa you'd be telling her to go to the principal at her school or to run to the cops. DOUBLE STANDARD!!!!!!
SoulSearch_CO Posted May 29, 2009 Posted May 29, 2009 Do not do anything as long as he is your teacher. There is NOTHING good that can come from this. If he is even half-professional, he will NOT pursue anything with you. Just wait. A sign of maturity on your part will be waiting until you're out of school before doing anything. I know it seems incredibly urgent at this time, but if it's real on either of your parts, it can wait. "Love is patient..." I won't judge beyond that - I know some people are and I don't think that's very fair. You can't always help who you fall for. But really - think about it - if he likes you, what can he do RIGHT NOW? Nothing. If he doesn't like you and you come onto him...AWKWARD. So just wait. If you want to pass him a letter on your last day of school - fine. But don't put him into the very strange position of having to stand up in front of the class everyday in front of you once you reveal your feelings. Regardless of how he feels, that will be weird for him.
bean1 Posted May 29, 2009 Posted May 29, 2009 He committed suicide at his parents house shortly after the incident became known. So YES a note can ruin a life. Anymore dumb questions you'd like to ask or do you feel enough like an *sshole already? I honestly can believe some of you condone this. I am willing to bet if he was hitting on her not vice versa you'd be telling her to go to the principal at her school or to run to the cops. DOUBLE STANDARD!!!!!! Ummm... no. Someone who commits suicide over a note? Either doesn't make sense or they had issues anyways. There's probably a lot more to just an innocent note. It happens all the time. Nobody is CONDONING this - everyone is saying "oh it's just a crush, don't worry about it, have fun". You seem to think that a teenage girl having a crush equates to a suicidal teacher. That is way over the top and dramatic. A teenage girl having a crush on him is not the same as him hitting on her. Are you kidding me?? I don't care how insensitive this seems, but if someone commits suicide over that, that is nobody's fault but his own. Don't EVER blame suicide on another person, especially a teenage girl. HE IS AN ADULT AND MADE HIS CHOICE.
JLee26 Posted May 29, 2009 Posted May 29, 2009 Don't EVER blame suicide on another person, especially a teenage girl. . Yes i see where you are coming from, we are all able to make our own choices. Never mind the constant bombardment you face from people blaming you over something that never occurred. There is nothing like watching your career fall in front over you because some girl got her panties in a twist and though there was a romantic connection between the two of you. And never mind the wedding you were planning going up in smoke because some girl (who at 18 simply was a "teenage girl") fabricated a relationship. And oh yes, pay no attention to the death threats that began showing up from angry disgruntle parents who viewed you as a sick twisted teacher. He was an innocent teacher and some young girl thought his loving eyes were meant for her. Her notes started a rumor mill that ultimately led to his untimely death. Do i blame the girl? Perhaps a bit, but it was more the snowball that followed that is truly to blame. It was a terrible thing to watch. Now in my area there are 2 more teachers mixed up in this sort of thing. And i know of a few others in out lying areas. It is becoming more and more frequent and i feel like it is time we reset moral boundaries. Student/teacher relationships are not ok. And as i said before if it were the teacher doing the posting asking how to approach a student i think more people would be upset. I am really sick of this thread and will not reply to it beyond this. I have stated my point, this is a bad situation. I hope that some of you could at least see that i am trying to look out for the best interest of this girl and trying to give her an example of how this can go terribly wrong. Do i expect this same situation to occur again, no, but if it should and i did not say anything i would live with guilt.
Bejita463 Posted May 29, 2009 Posted May 29, 2009 You think i'm kidding huh? Butler Area Senior High School Butler PA class of 2001. LOOK IT UP. What I think is if it happened the teacher was not innocent of misconduct, or he'd not have committed suicide. It is not uncommon for adolescents (male and female alike) to develop an interest in one of their teachers. I'd imagine it is very common for teachers to be approached, and whether there is a problem or not depends entirely upon how the teacher reacts to the situation, not how the student does. So YES a note can ruin a life. Anymore dumb questions you'd like to ask or do you feel enough like an *sshole already? No, I don't, because I don't believe that a note was all there was to it, provided it happened. Giving me homework does not prove that it was. I am curious if you see the irony in that question though. I honestly can believe some of you condone this. I am willing to bet if he was hitting on her not vice versa you'd be telling her to go to the principal at her school or to run to the cops. DOUBLE STANDARD!!!!!! If HE were hitting on HER, he would be committing a crime. Getting hit on is not a crime.
Recommended Posts