Babyribs Posted May 28, 2009 Posted May 28, 2009 My gf and i have been together 4.5 years and never before have we had any need for someone else, not alone not within our relationship. a couple of weeks ago we met a couple who have an open relationship and my gf liked that, doesnt really tell me this but you know "how dumb can you be not to notice" last sunday my gf finds our the couple likes us and want to date us. not just her but both of us. i have been a little confused and to be honest i didnt want to lose my relationship to an idea so i upted to date them both too. now my gf is acting totally different, doesnt seem interested in me, doesnt really want to talk to me, looks at me funny and the thing that gets me the most is "she doesnt want to talk to me from work" that i know she hasnt even kissed any of them, neither have i. but i am worried now, i am hurting inside and i have noone i can share this with because i would be so a shame of saying this to anyone. i dont know how to talk to her anymore, i feel that anything i may say would only make it worst. is dating outside of your relationship the right thing to do? did i mess up? does she need someone else and thats why she wants this? i dont know.....
girl68 Posted May 28, 2009 Posted May 28, 2009 This will never ever work. You know why, becasue even if you agree, this isn't what you want. And guess what the golden rule of open relationships is? ALL participating parties have to want this. Want being the opertive word here. I didn't say all parties will have agreed to this I said WANT. This is not the type of relationship you want. And you should never have agreed to this. Now look where you are, your gf isn't placing you as a priority, she isn't giving you the time of day you want. This is what open relationships do... they change things. You're not one for change. What to do: you talk to her. You don't mention that you actually had a talk with her about the potential problems, boundries that should be in place for a relationship to go from closed to open so obviously this wasn't throught through. So from here you tell her it's not going to work. You're a monogomous man, and don't share. Nor do you have any desire to BE shared. At that time she decides what she wants. You or You+1. This will never work if you continue the open relationship- that I can promise you.
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