amaysngrace Posted May 27, 2009 Posted May 27, 2009 But I think it's common courtesy to cancel, instead of just ignoring him. I agree. I don't think what he did really warrants him being stood up. On a side note it's a little funny that you say he behaves like a child.
carhill Posted May 27, 2009 Posted May 27, 2009 IMO, being honest is completely reasonable. "I found the text received in error to be distasteful and do not wish to meet with you Saturday, or in the future." Does that accurately reflect your thoughts on the matter?
Author Cherished Posted May 28, 2009 Author Posted May 28, 2009 Amysngrace, the text was not meant for me because I didn't tell him anything when I met him on Saturday that I was doing anything that I would "kick ass" with. I actually don't mind a little flirting, but it wasn't meant for me, it was meant for one of his sexual dalliances, or maybe even a girlfriend, who knows. Also he texted very, very soon after that text to apologize for it that even if I did want to reply there wasn't time to even do so. I feel at his age he can call to apologize and confirm our date. It's not really standing him up by not replying to his text because he's going to be in my area anyway for a graduation that afternoon. Plus since it's only Wednesday, he'll figure out by my nonresponse to his texts that it's not happening unless he actually has the nerve to pick up the phone. At least he will know that I have standards and if he realizes he is not capable of a basic courteous phone call then he is out. On top of that, I send texts but have NEVER EVER made the mistake of sending one to someone I didn't meant to send it to. It's pretty easy to avoid sending a message to the wrong person and I question someone's sobriety and intelligence if they are sending such a text accidentally.
Montclair0011 Posted May 28, 2009 Posted May 28, 2009 Well, I would probably still go out to dinner and give him a chance. But, if you have read my LS posts you would know my outstanding track record for getting involved with horrendous men. So nevermind. Don't listen to me.
amaysngrace Posted May 28, 2009 Posted May 28, 2009 At least he will know that I have standards and if he realizes he is not capable of a basic courteous phone call then he is out. So are you waiting for him to call you then? And then you'll decide? It's pretty easy to avoid sending a message to the wrong person and I question someone's sobriety and intelligence if they are sending such a text accidentally. Maybe he was in the middle of texting someone else when he decided to text you. There are a lot of maybes really but you seem to be very rigid right now. You hit it off in person and you liked him enough to make a date with him and he does one thing for which he apologized and you are being overly offended IMO. You didn't even date him yet. I'm just wondering if you are always this nitpicky.
Author Cherished Posted May 28, 2009 Author Posted May 28, 2009 OK it is very possible he has a girlfriend and was sending her a sexy text....so he's out pursuing women anyway for dates? 2nd possibility...he's sleeping with some other chick and he isn't even careful enough to keep this secret to himself. He just lacks character, IMHO. I'm not waiting for his call, just decided he is not for me.
2sunny Posted May 28, 2009 Posted May 28, 2009 just be up front and text him with "this isn't going to work for me" then you don't need to be hassling with it all week long and he knows where you stand.
sumdude Posted May 28, 2009 Posted May 28, 2009 I feel at his age he can call to apologize and confirm our date. Well he apologized for a wayward text with another text... a bit lame but at least there was an apology. It's not really standing him up by not replying to his text because he's going to be in my area anyway for a graduation that afternoon. Plus since it's only Wednesday, he'll figure out by my nonresponse to his texts that it's not happening unless he actually has the nerve to pick up the phone. At least he will know that I have standards and if he realizes he is not capable of a basic courteous phone call then he is out. Textbook passive/aggressive....
moman Posted May 28, 2009 Posted May 28, 2009 For the 928765413th time, text messaging dates or potential dates just leads to problems. I would respond and tell him that "You won't be seeing me or my backside anytime soon". It's better than just not responding.
Author Cherished Posted May 29, 2009 Author Posted May 29, 2009 just be up front and text him with "this isn't going to work for me" then you don't need to be hassling with it all week long and he knows where you stand. No, not hassling with it, just not responding to it.
Author Cherished Posted May 29, 2009 Author Posted May 29, 2009 Well he apologized for a wayward text with another text... a bit lame but at least there was an apology. Textbook passive/aggressive.... Totally not passive aggressive because I really couldn't care less.
lora22 Posted May 29, 2009 Posted May 29, 2009 For the 928765413th time, text messaging dates or potential dates just leads to problems. I would respond and tell him that "You won't be seeing me or my backside anytime soon". It's better than just not responding. AHAHAHAHAHAHA totally agree with the first part. Love the second part - nice response!
aotc Posted May 29, 2009 Posted May 29, 2009 If he really meant it then he's weird. But I usually make gay jokes with my friends when they throw a wise crack at me, through texts too. So it's not impossible that the same happened here. Then again, he IS 45...
marlena Posted May 29, 2009 Posted May 29, 2009 Plus he's not even calling me, just texting, and this guy is 45 (and super successful careerwise, I might add.) I'm going to pass - I have higher standards than that and he's clearly not THAT taken with me if he's cruising for sex elsewhere. If he can't send a text correctly, and take the effort to do that right, or even call instead of the juvenile texts to set up a date, forget it. I am with Cherished on this one. I expect an adult to act like an adult, responsibly, openly, maturely with class and diginity. Something like this happened to me recently. I told him one by one what I found fault with and that I was no longer interested. His actions spoke louder than his words and I realized that this was most definitely not what I was looking for in a man. He also seemed a bit confused about what he wanted. No, I like decisive men not insecure, mixed-up teenagers.
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