NOLA33 Posted May 25, 2009 Posted May 25, 2009 On may 5, I ended my 11 year relationship and 5.5 year marriage. Our home flooded in hurricane Katrina and since that time I've seen many, many changes within myself - the main one being I believe I need to experience more out of life and take control of things. We went to couples counseling for a while and that did help us communicate better. However, other issues popped up last august (another hurricane evacuation) and many health issues that started stirring up these feelings again. I essentially kept everything within me since august without saying a word to her and trying to make us work. Finally one day, I had it all festered up in me and I left. She didn't see it coming and I feel AWFUL about how I did it. Since I left, her and I still speak but I believe she is in stage 3 anger now. I believe that this is the best thing for me to do. I got and am currently at a place emotionally where I'm doing ok. My will to make us work isn't there anymore. Dealing with my parents with this has been nearly impossible. I hope that gets better as I now am concentrating on me now and it's what I need to do for me. So, that's my story.
Cinnamon777 Posted May 29, 2009 Posted May 29, 2009 It's important to use the communication skills you learned in counseling. If it helped once, it will help you now even if it's to end things with her. You don't really mentions specifics in regards to the problems between you, however it is clear that you don't seem to be interested in being married any more. I know it's painful to be the one breaking up the marriage, but I'm sure she feels even more terrible if she doesn't want things to end. Since you said that you are emotionally ok, you must have withdrawn your love for her some time ago. Because you have kept everything bottle up for so long, the people around you (your parents) had no idea of what was going on and may not be sure how to react. They might just think that you are going through something and everything will work out. There are a lot of great people on LS with sound advice. Are you looking for any specific insights or just needing to share your story?
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