LadyV Posted May 25, 2009 Posted May 25, 2009 I posted to breaking up board and meant to post to this, so I am copying my post from yesterday and bringing it over here.... So, today was my graduation day. I finally graduated from college!! My XH was there, and even sat with my family. He did bring his girlfriend which didn't bother me at all. We've been separated for almost 2 years and honestly, I am okay with her. After the ceremony, XH gave me a hug. He told me congratulations, and as he spoke, I could hear it in his voice...He pulled away, I looked at him, and he was tearing up. He walked away, and got something to drink, as well as probably take the attention off of him becuase my family saw this too. He took pictures of me with our kids, as well as pics of me with my family. When we were all leaving, he hugged me once again, and even kissed me on the cheek and continued to say congratulations. A little while later, I receive a text saying "Thanks for lettin me come. It's really great that you accomplished what you have. Might not mean much, but I am proud of you!" Wow...My XH wrote this!!! My reply: "Thank you "XH". That means a lot!! You helped me through a lot of that and I will always be thankful." My family and I went out to lunch, and when we got home, there was a card wedged in my door. I knew right away the handwriting on the envelope. It was XBF whom I have had NC with for 20 days. I open the card and it was a beautiful card...He wrote: "You definetely gave me the best that you have. I hope that it comes back to you 10x. I'm so happy that you got your walk, and your family was here. I would've loved to share that with you, but everything happens for a reason. I hope that you are well and happy. And I wish you all the success and happiness you deserve. Always, XBF." I was so shocked. I do no plan on responding or anything, although I wondered if I should. Then I think about how he is with her now and I just can't...but am thankful that I did get a card, as well as am shocked...and for him to personally bring it to my apt? Wow...I dunno. It was a really good day and a major accomplishment for me........I am glad that my family is so proud of me, and for both my XH and XBF tell me congrats? Well, that really does mean a lot....My XH's reaction took me by total surprise...I mean, for him to cry, then, as well as kiss me on the cheek and say congrats...WOW....His girlfriend was there, I wasn't sure if she saw it, I don't know. Then the card from XBF was totally unexpected....I am keeping NC with XBF. I started to write an email and attach pictures, but deleted it because NC is NC and I have to stick to it, no matter how much it hurts....In the long run, it still is, and will be the best thing for ME to heal and keep moving forward....
mark982 Posted May 25, 2009 Posted May 25, 2009 congrats on your graduation.you've must of left a hell of a impression on these two men,especially xh to open themselves up like that.
notalone Posted May 25, 2009 Posted May 25, 2009 I bet it feels good for you right now. I am happy for you V...finally some kindness and acknowledgment after all that you have been through because of those two. And congratulations on your graduation.
Author LadyV Posted May 25, 2009 Author Posted May 25, 2009 I have to admit, it does feel good. They both thought of me during my special day. My XH and I have remained civil and are sort of friends, reason being, we have 2 children...it took us a while to get there, but we did it. My XBF and I well, I started NC 22 days ago....Blocked his number and email, and found out that he is in fact dating someone new. I just had to do it. I was shocked to get his card on my door. I thought about sending him a thank you card just to let him know that I did infact get his card, but then again, figure, why bother. I don't want to open a can of worms. He didn't have to get my a graduation card, but the gesture was nice I suppose. Would it be bad to send him a thank you card via mail?
TaraMaiden Posted May 26, 2009 Posted May 26, 2009 Yes, it would be bad. You are in NC. He is with someone else. Very nice of him, very kind. But don't reply. Can of worms is right. be grateful for the card, but leave it be. _/l\_
Montclair0011 Posted May 26, 2009 Posted May 26, 2009 Wow, that is a nice story. Congratulations on your accomplishments. Hopefully the bad times will be behind you now!
Author LadyV Posted May 27, 2009 Author Posted May 27, 2009 I don't know about inspiring....But thank you!! I have decided to stick with NC. I am NOT going to send XBF a thank you card. I was going to, but really, am not willing to go there. I don't want to know about him and how he's doing. It hurts way too much STILL. I still have him blocked through cell phone company as well as email. I plan on keeping it that way until I am ready to talk to him again, which won't be for a while.... It sucks, I do want to tell XBF thank you for the card and thinking of me...but where was he 3 weeks ago, when I needed him to be there for me?? NO where around!!! So, Yeah, he and can sit there and realize.."Wow, i really screwed up..." but then again, he won't. I mean, the fact that he is with someone else already? Yeah...Whatever!!! What makes me mad is in the card he wrote..."You definately gave the best of you to me..." Yeah, and you treated it like trash!!! XH's reaction made the biggets impact on me. To see him crying like that and to tell me he was so proud of me and even kiss me on the cheek as he was leaving. I know, it is just a kind gesture, but after everything that we have been through as a married couple, we can look at one another and still care...but know that nothing will ever come of it I don't want it, and want to put the focus on me!!!! Thanks guys for your comments...
Recommended Posts