9Lives Posted May 24, 2009 Posted May 24, 2009 after 4 years of ups and downs. he told me not to call him anymore and he would not call me anymore. I feel relieved because I could not let go. Now all the hopoing and wishing and praying about it is over. He said he hates me when I get pushy. Is this weird that I feel relieved?
Kamille Posted May 24, 2009 Posted May 24, 2009 Is this weird that I feel relieved? I would say it's a great sign that this relationship is finally over. Enjoy it, you are free! No more energy has to spent trying to figure this situation out. No more down times! Remember this feeling, this moment. You still need to heal from the heartbreak, and so you will have moments of doubt. But this feeling of relief? This is how you truly feel. Welcome to freedom!
Author 9Lives Posted May 24, 2009 Author Posted May 24, 2009 I dont know. I think right now I dont know if i really believe him or it. we were definately on the last days and told me he dont want anything I dont have to do anything else for him he is going to delete my phone number he will not call me and I shouldnt call him He said he hates when I get pushy(I wasnt being pushy, just tired him being the one to call all the shots) he said he did not want to hear anything I had to say I just feel like he dont give a s/hit anymore. I didnt really get a chance to say anything. I think this was the first time I have been with someone and we stayed in touch while it was over and i dont think it works for me. I dont know
jj33 Posted May 25, 2009 Posted May 25, 2009 Its normal to be relieved. The A is so traumatic even when its good and being in touch afterwards just prolongs the pain as nice as it is sometimes to be in touch with someone you felt so much for. You dont have anything else for him? What are you his butcher? If that was his attitude be happy hes gone from your life. That is not what a friend says to you. Now you can really heal. And move past it. And its not up to him. After speaking to you the way he did? I would delete his number or block any of his calls, block his emails. You dont need that treatment from anyone.
Author 9Lives Posted May 25, 2009 Author Posted May 25, 2009 well I think I needed to hear that. For him, he never would really say the relatioship was over. He would always leave room for just in case. But this time he ended it cause he was so annoyed and frustrated and just did not give a care. so i guess he is gone I thanked him. just tired of hoping.
NoIDidn't Posted May 25, 2009 Posted May 25, 2009 Be glad this one is gone. He didn't respect you. Sounds like he was doing the typical guy thing when they get tired of a relationship but don't want to be the bad guy by ending it: giving you less and less until you got annoyed and ended it. But you didn't end it. You just kept asking for more. So he turned it up a notch with nastiness. He wanted this A over with a long time ago, but didn't do it nicely. You are better off without a man that doesn't know how to end a relationship with truth and honesty than with ....this....(I can't call him a man, sorry).
Author 9Lives Posted May 25, 2009 Author Posted May 25, 2009 Be glad this one is gone. He didn't respect you. Sounds like he was doing the typical guy thing when they get tired of a relationship but don't want to be the bad guy by ending it: giving you less and less until you got annoyed and ended it. But you didn't end it. You just kept asking for more. So he turned it up a notch with nastiness. He wanted this A over with a long time ago, but didn't do it nicely. You are better off without a man that doesn't know how to end a relationship with truth and honesty than with ....this....(I can't call him a man, sorry). It just wasnt going to work out anymore. He does care anymore. I am going to be fine. The gates of hell have been open and I am coming out finally
GreenEyedLady Posted May 25, 2009 Posted May 25, 2009 What a jerk... I'm glad you got the closure you needed. You're much better off without him.
sugarmomma Posted May 25, 2009 Posted May 25, 2009 after 4 years of ups and downs. he told me not to call him anymore and he would not call me anymore. I feel relieved because I could not let go. Now all the hopoing and wishing and praying about it is over. He said he hates me when I get pushy. Is this weird that I feel relieved? http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t144106/ Is this the same mm that left his W and was still dating other women after he got his own place? You have been back and forth with him for almost 5 years? You could have met a ton of single guys in all this time. Did he end up going back to his W? You may want to go into counseling since you have no boundaries with this person. I read some of your posts and this is a very enmeshed and unhealthy situation for you. You really have to start loving and respecting yourself before anyone else will. I wish you the best
Author 9Lives Posted May 25, 2009 Author Posted May 25, 2009 http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t144106/ Is this the same mm that left his W and was still dating other women after he got his own place? You have been back and forth with him for almost 5 years? You could have met a ton of single guys in all this time. Did he end up going back to his W? You may want to go into counseling since you have no boundaries with this person. I read some of your posts and this is a very enmeshed and unhealthy situation for you. You really have to start loving and respecting yourself before anyone else will. I wish you the best No he is not with his w. But that does not matter anymore. Yes it has been a horrible time for me and I realize that I need to work on me. I made the mistake of living this lifestyle and it is not good. I am glad it is over and now I am going to work on me.
sugarmomma Posted May 25, 2009 Posted May 25, 2009 No he is not with his w. But that does not matter anymore. Yes it has been a horrible time for me and I realize that I need to work on me. I made the mistake of living this lifestyle and it is not good. I am glad it is over and now I am going to work on me. So he is still married? Wow. You say its over but maybe you should go back and read some of your old posts. How many times have you two "ended it" and started again. Stop all contact with him for good. Change your numbers, move out of town anything to take control of your life because he has absolutely no respect for anyone. Put yourself first and kick his azz to the curb!!!!!!
White Flower Posted May 25, 2009 Posted May 25, 2009 I don't think it's weird to feel relieved. I think it is quite normal. No more wondering if and when that call will come. No more wondering if he'll answer every question in the email. No more wondering if his W will call you. Yes, relief of all that is quite normal. Perhaps wondering and hoping are related. You are well on your way!
Author 9Lives Posted May 26, 2009 Author Posted May 26, 2009 So he is still married? Wow. You say its over but maybe you should go back and read some of your old posts. How many times have you two "ended it" and started again. Stop all contact with him for good. Change your numbers, move out of town anything to take control of your life because he has absolutely no respect for anyone. Put yourself first and kick his azz to the curb!!!!!! Your positive attitude is KILLING me!!
Author 9Lives Posted May 26, 2009 Author Posted May 26, 2009 I don't think it's weird to feel relieved. I think it is quite normal. No more wondering if and when that call will come. No more wondering if he'll answer every question in the email. No more wondering if his W will call you. Yes, relief of all that is quite normal. Perhaps wondering and hoping are related. You are well on your way! He called today. Did not leave a message. What a jerk!!!
Soaked Posted May 26, 2009 Posted May 26, 2009 He called today. Did not leave a message. What a jerk!!! I think it's good he didn't leave a message. And what a jerk he called!
Author 9Lives Posted May 27, 2009 Author Posted May 27, 2009 I think it's good he didn't leave a message. And what a jerk he called! he is a jerk JUST for calling. Im done
Chrome Barracuda Posted May 28, 2009 Posted May 28, 2009 he is a jerk JUST for calling. Im done I'm happy for you... Surely this whole situation has brought nothing but pain. It wasnt worth it. Go NC!
Soaked Posted May 28, 2009 Posted May 28, 2009 he is a jerk JUST for calling. Exactly!! Just remember if he ever leave vm or email you don't even listen/read it. It will only stir your emotion and mess you up.
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