dharris27 Posted May 24, 2009 Posted May 24, 2009 I'm wondering how an unbiased person would see my current situation with a guy we'll call steve. I met steve on new years and apparently he thought i was cute. By the end of the night we were wasted and he told me he liked me (we did hit it off)- got my number so we could hang out. Before i left he took me to the hall way and made out with me then tried to come home with me. Clearly i know this is a drunken hook up thing and it happens. We do not go home together but the next day he calls me and we talk for a while and he really wants to get together for a date. We talk about that and then later on he texts me throughout the night about what i'm doing and i invite myself over to his house around 1 am and he agrees. Of course we talked for several hours and then hooked up. (no sex) The next day he told me to text him throughout my vacation. So we text back and forth througout the next weeks. He takes me out on a date "like real people do" according to him. We talk for six hours on the date and then he hugs me and says he'll call me that weekend. That weekend i'm too busy to hang and I stay too busy to hang out for a week or so. We talk on the phone here and there. One night he tells me he is speaking with ex again and wanted to make sure i knew as not to be an a-hole. Apparently they had broken up recently and she wanted to get back together. He did not though but even so he wanted me to know that that was what he was dealing with. He also said he probably wanted to be single for a while rather than jump into another relationship and that he had a history of being of preferring undefined relationships with women and he didn't want me to get involved without knowing that. I was cool with this because i didn't see Steve and I being a couple as he's about 15 years older than me - I'm 24 he's 39. He's good looking and we hang out with the same crowd. And i do come off a lot older, but i just didn't think it realistic. I was also being asked out my a guy more my age who is super nice and more reasonable. I told Steve this and we agreed we were in simialr situations but he never said he wanted to stop seeing me. Over time we just stopped talking. I guess neither of us wanted to mess with the others game. But we did see each other out here and there. I think once he tried to hang out with me but i couldn't again. One night about three months after all this he texts me out of no where about a Band i was going to see that night. He knew because of my facebook status. He shows up and we hang the whole night and he buys me drinks ect. It seemed so random but we still got a long great. He insists on taking me home and then coming in the use the restroom. We're standing around awkwardly and it's late so i ask what happened with his ex. He said they fought and didn't have sex and didn't get back together. He said he wasn't seeing anyone until he met me. Then he asked about the guys i was seeing and i told him i just didn't "feel" it and that the two of us hung out and dated for three months without even making out once. It gets really awkward so i ask him if he wants to stay over as we had done that before and he didn't want to leave. He says NO, and that had to get up early for work or he would. I'm really confused and I have never asked a guy that so i was embarassed. So i walk him out and he hugs me. I don't here from him the next day either. Two nights later i post on my facebook that i'm going to another show. He magically shows up without telling me and only talks to me the whole night. Then he goes home and we agree we'll see each other saturday at another one of our friends shows. I do see him that night but i feel nervous and have a hard time talking to him. I just don't know what he wants from me. All of us end up staying out till 5 am and this other girl comes with us who looks like me but is a bit older than me and maybe a bit cuter. I see she knows chad pretty well as she hugs him from time to time. But they don't talk but once that evening and he came with his platonic friend and company earlier that night. I start to suspect though, that this girl likes him. He stares at me the whole night and tries to think of things to say to me. I just feel nervous and confused. That night i felt like he was giving me mixed signals but ulltimately i felt blown off a bit, even though i was doing it too out of being nervous. We don't see each other for a month or so and then end up hanging out with friends again one night. He follows me to my final destination bar with another male mutual friend of ours. He buys my beer again and we all talk for three hours, it was good. A few days later someone suggest they know he has been hanging out with that other girl i mentioned. I figured. But whatever. So, then he shows up again about two nights later where i said i'd be on facebook. Our mutual friends were djing. But he's clearly there to see me. We stay out again late and then he invites me over. We talk a lot and laugh and we do end up having sex. The next night we end up at the same party which was a fake prom for adults where i believe he came with "the other girl." He knew i would be there. I just don't know what to make of all this. He talked to me of course and once again the two of them seemed more like friends and they didn't even hang around each other that much. But by then end of the night she's hugging him again and i start to wonder seriously, what thier deal is. I felt dirty though. I don't normally do this though. And i guess i do like him although i don't think it realistic we date. I ended up being a little stand offish in case he was on a date that night...i dunno. This is so confusing. And please realize that I know girls who staying invloved in something like this come off a but insecure and pathetic and i clearly do not want to be that girl. For all i know he and that girl are just friends and does have some of those. But i don't want to ask and I really just wonder if i'm being played.
Yamaha Posted May 25, 2009 Posted May 25, 2009 I just don't know what he wants from me. HE wanted what you finally gave him and now he's ready to move on.
lora22 Posted May 25, 2009 Posted May 25, 2009 He's 39 and still acts like that? Forget about him. You can do better. I agree with the first reply.
Mahatma Posted May 25, 2009 Posted May 25, 2009 Sounds like he finally reached his goal and left. Shame you are still dealing with that at that age.
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