Ameliorate Posted May 24, 2009 Posted May 24, 2009 ....So she never told you, but eventualy you find out her best friend is male...
missdependant Posted May 24, 2009 Posted May 24, 2009 Put on your big people pants and try to befriend him.. best advice I have. If it's something that bothers you, look back on the facts.. how long they've been best friends, if they've ever dated and how long ago, are they family friends, etc.. Give him/her a chance at least. Jealousy is probably the biggest turn off ever.
Author Ameliorate Posted May 25, 2009 Author Posted May 25, 2009 Put on your big people pants and try to befriend him.. best advice I have. If it's something that bothers you, look back on the facts.. how long they've been best friends, if they've ever dated and how long ago, are they family friends, etc.. Give him/her a chance at least. Jealousy is probably the biggest turn off ever. You know in my "right" mind I actually knew this, but once I get involved I go blind and can't think rational. Thanks for the reply, it woke me again...
cbreitel Posted May 25, 2009 Posted May 25, 2009 I've been down this road so many times. Yeah, jealousy sucks, but guess what... a male best friend has either (a) tried to sleep with her in the past and probably succeeded or (b) secretly wants to sleep with her now. This has proved true in every single situation I've become familiar with over time. The girl I'm dating right now has a male BFF, so deep inside I was a bit concerned about this. She goes on road trips with him, his FB profile is a photo of the TWO of them, etc., all very weird stuff. There is a God, though. Last week, he shocked her and everyone else in their friend circle by coming out of the closet as gay. lol.
dreamergrl Posted May 25, 2009 Posted May 25, 2009 I've had a lot of guy friends in the past. Some where true friends, others did want to sleep with me. I always drew the line though. I wouldn't let a male friend get in the way of a relationship, nor would I let a boyfriend dictate to me on who to be friends with. I'm my own person, and can handle saying no.
cbreitel Posted May 25, 2009 Posted May 25, 2009 Translation: Some were true friends [who wanted to sleep with me but didn't say or do anything about it], others did want to sleep with me [and did something about it, which made me mad]. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fuUhwFXM6Gg
lora22 Posted May 25, 2009 Posted May 25, 2009 Also check out ladder theory - yes it's (somewhat) satirical, but it's also TRUE. To be fair though, just because it's true doesn't mean that anything is going on, or will happen either.
dreamergrl Posted May 25, 2009 Posted May 25, 2009 Translation: Some were true friends [who wanted to sleep with me but didn't say or do anything about it], others did want to sleep with me [and did something about it, which made me mad]. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fuUhwFXM6Gg I find this a bit insulting. One of those male friends, I actually tried to pursue eventually. They just wanted to be friends.
lora22 Posted May 25, 2009 Posted May 25, 2009 I find this a bit insulting. One of those male friends, I actually tried to pursue eventually. They just wanted to be friends. IMO, in fe/male "friendships" one or both of the people involved are interested in/attracted to the other. Usually it's the guy. Sometimes it's the girl.
dreamergrl Posted May 25, 2009 Posted May 25, 2009 IMO, in fe/male "friendships" one or both of the people involved are interested in/attracted to the other. Usually it's the guy. Sometimes it's the girl. So what does that say for my male friends who have a girl, fiance, wife? And I most certainly do not have interest in them.
cbreitel Posted May 25, 2009 Posted May 25, 2009 I know married women who I'm very attracted to and will go nowhere near (romantically) because they are married. That doesn't change the fact that I'm attracted to them.
You'reasian Posted May 25, 2009 Posted May 25, 2009 ....So she never told you, but eventualy you find out her best friend is male... That's fine. People grow up together or work together and sometimes, they become best friends. Is there more to the story?
lora22 Posted May 25, 2009 Posted May 25, 2009 I know married women who I'm very attracted to and will go nowhere near (romantically) because they are married. That doesn't change the fact that I'm attracted to them. Exactly Being interested in or attracted to someone doesn't mean that either party will ever act on it.
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