twicebitten Posted May 23, 2009 Posted May 23, 2009 Ok, quick RECAP: April 1st my ex & I have a horrific fight ... he childishly emailed my literary agent & publisher horrid lies about me ... I go to PD, they file reports, call him, give him a gag-order, etc., This eve I get home to an email from him!!? Simply said: "Happy Holidays from me & (his son's name)!!! Miss you! " WTH!!?? I've been doing sooooo well .... NC (lil easier since the PD reports & horrid thing he did to me) but still I've been HEALING!!! Even weirder in the "to" line it says "none"!?? I'm suppossed to report any contact to the Detective, but was just gonna let this go ... don't even know IF this was meant for me, since the "to" line said none!?? HELP ... of course I'm NOT going to respond, but do I give it to the PD!!?? THANK YOU ALL & Happy Memorial Day!! XO - Twicebitten -
Author twicebitten Posted May 24, 2009 Author Posted May 24, 2009 I know I'm computer-illiterate (LOL) but HOW/why do you send a email to someone with "none" as the recipient!?? Don't get it!?? Was his email a 'mistake' to me ... or trying to 'hide' it!?? TY!! XO - TB -
Art_Critic Posted May 24, 2009 Posted May 24, 2009 Please report this contact.. If you don't you are giving him the signal for more contact and if you alllow this it may interfere with the strength of the no contact/gag order. If you look at the email headers or source it will have your email addy inside.. it says none because he sent it from a mail client that doesn't have you in the contact list.. he just typed your email address.
Author twicebitten Posted May 24, 2009 Author Posted May 24, 2009 ... THANK YOU!! I WILL report this!!! And I'm TRYING 2nite to just FORGET it & HIM!!! He no longer has that control to rattle me any longer (repeat this 10 times)!!! XO - TB -
Art_Critic Posted May 24, 2009 Posted May 24, 2009 He no longer has that control to rattle me any longer This is true too.. believe it.. The more time that goes by the more you will feel in control, no need to go backwards now...
Author twicebitten Posted May 24, 2009 Author Posted May 24, 2009 This is true too.. believe it.. The more time that goes by the more you will feel in control, no need to go backwards now... No SH*T!!! I REFUSE to go BACKWARDS!!! XO - TB -
whichwayisup Posted May 24, 2009 Posted May 24, 2009 Change your email address. Even if you block him, he can just create another account and email you again.
iBelieve In Symmetry Posted May 24, 2009 Posted May 24, 2009 HOW/why do you send a email to someone with "none" as the recipient!?? Haha, I was wondering the same thing.
Author twicebitten Posted May 24, 2009 Author Posted May 24, 2009 ... I was going to change, not only my phone #'s, but my email addy, but the Det. suggested NOT to!!? Also, I've changed my #'s twice already & my daughter is getting ANNOYED with me!! LOL! Secondly, it is a hassle to change emails when your biz-contacts are ALL by email!!? I've decided on Tue (after holiday) I'm taking email to the detective ... let him handle it ... I'm sure my ex does NOT want to get arrested ... he's too much of a narrsisist/egomaniac to go through that!!? LOL! THANK YOU! XO - TB -
WhyYesThankYou Posted May 24, 2009 Posted May 24, 2009 ... I was going to change, not only my phone #'s, but my email addy, but the Det. suggested NOT to!!? I guess this is because you shouldn't have to go to the inconvenience of doing all that; your ex should just respect your wishes and not contact you, or failing that, should adhere to the conditions of the restraining/trespass order. Also I guess if you keep those contact details the same, then you'll know more easily if he's still trying to harass you (rather than silence which could mean he got the message and is leaving you alone, or is still trying to track down your new details). It's like giving him enough rope to hang himself. I agree it should be reported. Hope the drama will stop soon.
Author twicebitten Posted May 24, 2009 Author Posted May 24, 2009 ... THAT makes sense!! And it WAS sooo nice withOUT the drama... now I'm having some 'flashbacks' but plan to 'sleep-it-off' ... like a hangover!! 2morrow I hope to have my equilibrium back!!! THANK YOU ... this all seems more-managable now! XO - TB -
Author twicebitten Posted May 27, 2009 Author Posted May 27, 2009 THank you all 4 your replies!! Today I took the email to the PD ... the Detective on the case was NOT happy that my ex broke the NC order & can't seem to follow orders!! He told me that he actually likes lockin' perps up & that he just might haul him in!!? This actually SCARED me!!! I mean, my exes rath apparently is mean-as-hell & I'm worried he'll somehow retaliate again!!? The Det left me a VM, saying he thinks he's settled this sitch, but by the time I got home it was too late to return his call ... I'll have to wait until 2morrow to see what happened!!? I HATE THIS!! Not only have I been trying to get over a broken-heart AND do damage-control for my upcoming career because of this IDIOT, now I'm actually scared, as well!! Send me 'calming-vibes' ... thank you!!! XO - TB -
Art_Critic Posted May 27, 2009 Posted May 27, 2009 You've done great TB... I'm glad you did the follow through needed and I'm sure the Detective is also. I'll bet that he had a nice talk with him and gave him the rundown of his future if he continues down the path he is going with you.
Author twicebitten Posted May 27, 2009 Author Posted May 27, 2009 ... Artcritic!! I wasn't sooo sure I was doing the right thing until I saw the look on the Detective's face!! He assured me that ANY contact, abusive or NOT, was breaking his orders!! I also told the Det that my ex is probably doing steroids (he's into body-building & has terrible back-acne ... a tell-tail sign) and maybe a reason for his actions!?? The Det only said that that could better our 'case'! I don't want a 'case' .... to go to court ... to face HIM!! I just want it OVER & to HEAL!!! Thanks for all the support on this!! XO - TB -
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