Guys - on How to Handle a Boyfriend in Anxiety Mode

[AlektraClementine]

My boyfriend for the last week or so has been in a funk. Symptoms are, distant (not physically but in a "thinky" way), sleeplessness, upset stomach not due to a bug. Those are the main ones.

 

A little background: He is a contract worker and depends on "gigs" to pay the bills. Opportunities always inevitably come his way because of his standing in the industry, but he freaks a little when his calender isn't full for the next 3-4 months. He's in that situation now.

 

We have also been hitting the marriage topic hard. Not in a Me-Pressuring-Him way. We've just been talking more seriously lately about finances, children, the partnership in general.

 

This alone is enough to make men need LOTS of introspection time. My question is, what can I do to help. If the answer is, let him be, I want to hear that too.

 

Thanks in advance!

[Mycroft]

Anxiety is a strange thing. I'm not sure what type of anxiety hes having, if its just worried about his work, or is he always full of anxiety but work and marriage talk are making it worse. I've definitely been through a time where I was full of anxiety over anything and everything, and while I don't think there's much you can do to make him feel better, not pressuring him any further is huge. I'm not saying you have pressured him with marriage talk, but it might be a good time to back burner that idea, let him bring it up when hes feeling more stable. My anxiety generally wasn't focused on any 1 thing, but the main thing that bothered me was unresolved conflict. So I would sort of leave him be, not avoid him or change the amount of time you spend together, but just be normal and easy going. Try to make things feel stable and there's nothing to really worry about.

[redant]

I heard that men want to solve their problems alone. They don't want any help. So I think for now give him time and go out and make YOU happy for now. Let him be. For anxiety take some deep breaths.