Trialbyfire Posted May 23, 2009 Posted May 23, 2009 I heard about that as well. But I feel like my personal dating profile is following the shadows of my mother. I've seen the relationships she's in, marrying men who are abusive and putting up with them. She lets them take advantage of her and while she can't see it, I can it clearly as light as day. Sometimes I wonder if I'm turning into her, and letting guys take advantage of me, just so I can keep them around. I think I need to move out.It sounds like you're a combination of a mother that has set an example for you and a father who wasn't around to show you what love really is. My question to you, is what are you going to do with this information? You know that you put up with a lot of crap from guys who treat you as sub-human, with no respect or courtesy. So, what are you going to do about it?
amaysngrace Posted May 23, 2009 Posted May 23, 2009 How do I go about doing that? Do I ask my mom about my dad ( whom I've never met) or would it be more like doing exercises where I question my every motive and action and contribute them to how I channeled my lack of a father attitude towards other people? You can see the similarities in women who have grown up without a dad's presence. You can see what the side effects are. And you can use it to be more aware of your own feelings and how you handle yourself in certain situations. It's like a tool for self-improvement. I'm sure some doctor wrote a book on this very thing somewhere.
Star Gazer Posted May 25, 2009 Posted May 25, 2009 I'm only asking because it seems like you try real hard to have a man in your life. And a man's acceptance of you somehow makes you determine your own self-worth. It's a bit unhealthy. Ding ding ding! We have a winner. I've said this to you not once, not twice, but THREE times, Paper. I hope hearing it from someone else has lent credibility to it.
amaysngrace Posted May 25, 2009 Posted May 25, 2009 I've said this to you not once, not twice, but THREE times, Paper. Paper you should listen to Star. She not only talks the talk but she has walked the walk. Plus you're getting her expert advice for free. :laugh:
Star Gazer Posted May 25, 2009 Posted May 25, 2009 Paper you should listen to Star. She not only talks the talk but she has walked the walk. SEVERAL times over! As a result, unfortunately, I can see a fatherless young woman a mile away.
amaysngrace Posted May 25, 2009 Posted May 25, 2009 SEVERAL times over! As a result, unfortunately, I can see a fatherless young woman a mile away. But fortunately as a result you have found true love and are in a healthy relationship.
Star Gazer Posted May 25, 2009 Posted May 25, 2009 But fortunately as a result you have found true love and are in a healthy relationship. Ah, yes, Tis true.
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