Tennisguy Posted May 22, 2009 Posted May 22, 2009 Hello all, I recently joined this forum to get some advice. I have recently completed my first year in college. However, I've never been in an actual "relationship" before, and I met the first girl I was really interested in in college. Ok, so... I met this girl during the first month of school in one of my classes. She sat next to me and I talked to her, but later she started sitting at her normal spot, which was on the other side of the room. She was kind of late to class that day. I was always nervous to talk to her, and I asked friends for advice. Facebook was something I used to chat with her online, in order to get to know her better, because I was nervous to actually talk to her in person at first. So, I would talk to her about her day, interests, how she was doing, and etc. After a while, I noticed that she would stare at me quite a bit during class and when she entered class. My friend told me to sit with her in the lecture hall, but a friend would sit next to her, so I never did that. I thought it would be a bad idea, but I decided to talk to her after one of the smaller classes we had together. She would also smile at me, when I smiled at her. So, after a while, I asked her to study with me for a final and that went well. I got to know her better, and I finally got her phone number. However, I called her for an invitation eat lunch with me, after one of her finals. She told me that she was already leaving to go back home, and I understood. I made sure to ask her how her finals went, and I told her I would see her next semester. During the break, I would talk to her over facebook. Strangely, I was having a normal conversation with her over facebook, and I asked her the question "Do you think you'll get everything you want for Christmas this year?" She replied "you... ." Before and after she said this she would log in and out, and she also didn't talk to me after she said this until January! Also, she said "sorry, my internet is messing up.", before she stopped responding to me. I would try to message her, but I would get no response. I couldn't stop thinking about the fact that she wouldn't talk to me and was ignoring me. My cousin and friends told me to stop thinking about it and to not message her a lot because it shows desperation. I didn't message her until January, when she finally talked to me. When I finally saw her at school, she was still shy and silent around me. I would talk to her after class, but other of her friends were around us, so I was hesitant in trying to ask her to hang out with them around. I asked her to eat dinner one night at a dining hall with me, and she brought a friend with her! I was kind of upset about this, considering that I wanted her to come alone. So, I wasn't able to actually tell her my true feelings for her. I also heard that she asked a friend, if I liked her. I don't know what he said though. After I asked her to eat dinner that one time, I didn't ask her to go anywhere else with me for quite some time. One of my friends actually asked me, if I still liked her, while she was online! I suspected that she asked him to ask me. I would hang out with her with friends, and I finally asked her to eat dinner with me at a restaurant about two months later. However, I actually asked if she was busy that week at first, and she said "not really and that she wouldn't mind meeting for dinner or hanging out.". So, I told her that I would text her about the details. When I finally texted her the invitation, she sent me back a text saying "sorry my boyfriend is in town visiting me, so I'm kind of busy.". I was so shocked because I never knew she had a boyfriend, and I thought that she may be lying to me. I tried to forget about it, but I never really have. Also, I never talked to her much after that. I still talked to her over facebook and after class somewhat. She went a different route from me after class was done though... possibly because some of our other friends dropped the class that walked with us afterwards. I still caught her staring at me, while I wasn't looking. She is also transferring to a different university next year, but I'm sure that she'll visit the university I am attending on occasion to see friends. I was just kind of depressed that she rejected one of my invitations and the fact that she may have lied to me. I thought that she liked me and maybe she does, but I can't tell and no one else can either. I've been trying to stop thinking about her, but I just can't seem to. I will be sad that she is leaving. My biggest question to you guys is "should I just forget about her?", or "should I still talk to her over facebook and possibly try again?". Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Thanks.
Author Tennisguy Posted May 22, 2009 Author Posted May 22, 2009 Here is my first post in paragraph form.... I know it will be easier on the eyes. Hello all, I recently joined this forum to get some advice. I have recently completed my first year in college. However, I've never been in an actual "relationship" before, and I met the first girl I was really interested in in college. Ok, so... I met this girl during the first month of school in one of my classes. She sat next to me and I talked to her, but later she started sitting at her normal spot, which was on the other side of the room. She was kind of late to class that day. I was always nervous to talk to her, and I asked friends for advice. Facebook was something I used to chat with her online, in order to get to know her better, because I was nervous to actually talk to her in person at first. So, I would talk to her about her day, interests, how she was doing, and etc. After a while, I noticed that she would stare at me quite a bit during class and when she entered class. My friend told me to sit with her in the lecture hall, but a friend would sit next to her, so I never did that. I thought it would be a bad idea, but I decided to talk to her after one of the smaller classes we had together. She would also smile at me, when I smiled at her. So, after a while, I asked her to study with me for a final and that went well. I got to know her better, and I finally got her phone number. However, I called her for an invitation eat lunch with me, after one of her finals. She told me that she was already leaving to go back home, and I understood. I made sure to ask her how her finals went, and I told her I would see her next semester. During the break, I would talk to her over facebook. Strangely, I was having a normal conversation with her over facebook, and I asked her the question "Do you think you'll get everything you want for Christmas this year?" She replied "you... ." Before and after she said this she would log in and out, and she also didn't talk to me after she said this until January! Also, she said "sorry, my internet is messing up.", before she stopped responding to me. I would try to message her, but I would get no response. I couldn't stop thinking about the fact that she wouldn't talk to me and was ignoring me. My cousin and friends told me to stop thinking about it and to not message her a lot because it shows desperation. I didn't message her until January, when she finally talked to me. When I finally saw her at school, she was still shy and silent around me. I would talk to her after class, but other of her friends were around us, so I was hesitant in trying to ask her to hang out with them around. I asked her to eat dinner one night at a dining hall with me, and she brought a friend with her! I was kind of upset about this, considering that I wanted her to come alone. So, I wasn't able to actually tell her my true feelings for her. I also heard that she asked a friend, if I liked her. I don't know what he said though. After I asked her to eat dinner that one time, I didn't ask her to go anywhere else with me for quite some time. One of my friends actually asked me, if I still liked her, while she was online! I suspected that she asked him to ask me. I would hang out with her with friends, and I finally asked her to eat dinner with me at a restaurant about two months later. However, I actually asked if she was busy that week at first, and she said "not really and that she wouldn't mind meeting for dinner or hanging out.". So, I told her that I would text her about the details. When I finally texted her the invitation, she sent me back a text saying "sorry my boyfriend is in town visiting me, so I'm kind of busy.". I was so shocked because I never knew she had a boyfriend, and I thought that she may be lying to me. I tried to forget about it, but I never really have. Also, I never talked to her much after that. I still talked to her over facebook and after class somewhat. She went a different route from me after class was done though... possibly because some of our other friends dropped the class that walked with us afterwards. I still caught her staring at me, while I wasn't looking. She is also transferring to a different university next year, but I'm sure that she'll visit the university I am attending on occasion to see friends. I was just kind of depressed that she rejected one of my invitations and the fact that she may have lied to me. I thought that she liked me and maybe she does, but I can't tell and no one else can either. I've been trying to stop thinking about her, but I just can't seem to. I will be sad that she is leaving. My biggest question to you guys is "should I just forget about her?", or "should I still talk to her over facebook and possibly try again?". Any advice would be greatly appreciated
start-fresh Posted May 22, 2009 Posted May 22, 2009 Never post stuff in more than one forum. Pick one and stick to that thread.
Author Tennisguy Posted May 22, 2009 Author Posted May 22, 2009 Ok, I understand... however, should I repost the thread because it seems I'm not getting many responses.
Odyssey Posted May 22, 2009 Posted May 22, 2009 Paragraphs...haha, much better. I think she always just liked you as a friend, but it's obvious from what you said, you actually want more than friends. If it was me, i would dial back my feelings for this girl and be friends. If you can't do that, then the best thing is to move on. Rejections suck, we all know, but you'll just have to deal with it.
Author Tennisguy Posted May 22, 2009 Author Posted May 22, 2009 Maybe she does just want to be friends. However, I remember the last time I saw her just passing by... and we exchanged glances for a while. Maybe it will take a long time to get over this. I know that I should probably stick to being friends and move on.
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