hopesndreams Posted May 21, 2009 Posted May 21, 2009 My H and I have been separated for a little over a month, he is with another and it's a long, drawn out story but the condensed form of the aftermath is this. I still love him deeply, have forgiven him---he knows this---I have been going LC for almost 2 weeks and each day he springs something in an email that throws me off course. I just want to respond, I love you, come back to me, yeah...and the rest BUT that is the wrong course of action! That's where you guys come in. His latest line is my new signature---Sometimes a really good book is ruined because the author ends the book early as he thinks there are better books to write, and a masterpiece is ruined---- I just can't ignore this one but don't want to make a response that will push him further away. Suggestions? Thanks.
Ronni_W Posted May 21, 2009 Posted May 21, 2009 I'd write back something like, "I'm not really sure how to interpret this -- would you mind clarifying for me so that there is absolutely no confusion?" That is, I'd put the onus back on him to communicate clearly...sounds as if he is trying to tell you something AND making you responsible to (try to) figure out what is in HIS head. That's BS. Give it back to him, and don't add anything of your own until he finds his own clarity. My two cents
Author hopesndreams Posted May 21, 2009 Author Posted May 21, 2009 Thanks Ronni..I put the onus back on him and he did not communicate clearly and it's just more of his BS. Stuff I have already heard so many times b4 and if i had a nickel for everytime......here's his response. I feel let down.....again! it means that i destroyed what we had with my thoughtless and selfish behaviour
Ronni_W Posted May 21, 2009 Posted May 21, 2009 Crap! I totally feel your let down Also means the silly man didn't really understand the piece he quoted, doesn't it? Or, didn't realize what ELSE it could mean? Or, we (women) are just too...what? "NORMAL minded"??? Good news, I suppose, is what we ought to focus on: You found out sooner than later. That is better than not, yes? Crap! I really thought it was going to have a different meaning for him. At least, I had hoped. BIG hugs. it means that i destroyed what we had with my thoughtless and selfish behaviour Or. If you're up for it, you can respond with, "Yeah...how does that realization sit with you?" Cos maybe he IS trying to start some kind of dialogue and just doesn't have the first clue how, or is doing it in some type of "man" way that I don't understand, or something? I dunno...it's just a thought that came to me, that I'm sharing. But. You know him. And, more importantly, you know how much more your heart can take. Big BIG hugs.
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