Isolde Posted May 19, 2009 Posted May 19, 2009 That latter article had a couple of good points in a swarm of horrible advice. The author hardly talks at all about why she chose the guy she did, instead focusing on clothes and how much alcohol to drink.
mr.dream merchant Posted May 19, 2009 Posted May 19, 2009 And on a different note, my dad was player before he met my mom (Mom and his highschool friend can vouch for that). So growing up he really put the idea in my head that chicks really aren't **** and that I should never try to be something I'm not for a chick, to have more pride than that. I'm actually thankful I had a player for a father. Along with that mentality he passed on his good looks. All through highschool I was called an ******* by lots of chicks. I mean, ******* in terms of what? These were pretty girls who were used to being pampered and when it came to me I never really played that dumb game, so in turn, they called me an *******. But you can bet your ass they were still getting down with me.
paddington bear Posted May 19, 2009 Posted May 19, 2009 Yes, it does create Chemistry, remember there are different types. Some women want the kind of chemistry where they feel like your the same person... like, we are so similar. How many times have you heard a woman say "we have so much in common" when talking about a guy she likes. Some women want sexual chemistry. The best way to have this is to dress great, have good hygiene, be very confident, and be very conscious of your body language. At times be somewhat sexually suggestive. Some women want fun and adventure. Some women want comfortable chemistry. Some women want the old opposites attract.... ect. See, if you think chemistry is just two people who exude matching pheromones your totally missing it. Your brain controls everything... even the release of hormones. So, you can create a physical response within someone with your words, actions, or body language. It really is the most important part. Well, you've certainly made me think. The concept of creating chemistry is I guess a hard one to swallow and at the same time makes some sort of sense, still unsure as to whether I totally agree though. I mean, yeah, sure how you use your body language and so on will have an affect on how the other person reacts to you, so maybe you're right...tell you what, I'll give it a go the next time I meet someone who is 'nice' but I don't think there's much chemistry with and see if I can make the chemistry happen and report back.
Untouchable_Fire Posted May 19, 2009 Posted May 19, 2009 Thanks Untouchable. My reaction to the Gottlieb article was :sick: too. One more point I want to make in this thread which I've already rambled far too much in. Relationships and marriage are two very different things. It makes sense to be far pickier personality and values-wise with a prospective marriage partner than someone you're just dating. ESPECIALLY if kids are going to be involved. This is why I don't think women who have never married can be said to be too picky. On the other hand, a woman who hasn't been in an R by 40? Yeah, she's almost definitely too picky. 2 different scenarios. Yeah... Gottlieb is saying... just grab whatever guy is willing to hit the altar with you. I swear that is my greatest fear... having someone just settle for me. I'd rather be rejected outright, than waste years of my life with someone who thinks I'm just so-so. It's probably an irrational fear though... because I'm not so-so... I'm awesome. Why would you date someone who you would not consider marrying? I'd rather be single.
kizik Posted May 19, 2009 Posted May 19, 2009 Its really society's fault. Women were brought up to be hot commodities, sought after by floods of men. Men were brought up to try and be a knight in shining armor so he can win over the most sought after chick. Not only that but its supply and demand, like dude Glen Quagmire was saying. Women can pick and choose, and set their standards dumb high because...well...they can. They command dick. They command it so ridiculously that a average looking chick could stand on the side of a busy road with just underwear on and a sign that says single and looking and I'm sure at least 50 guys will try to **** her. Guys on the other hand, are always in need/want of pussy because we do not get it so easily. I only get to bone my shorty 3 times a week if I'm lucky. Anyways, the point of this post is, chicks set their standards really high because they can. And because dumb guys will try and fit those standards instead of telling her to go **** herself if she doesn't want dude for him. Once, just once, I want to go chit chat a hot chick up and then look down at her feet tell her no thanks because of the type of shoes she's wearing...lmao. Or be like "Oh is that your G35 Coupe out there? Ahhhh...sssss...yeaaaaaah.....I'm actually not looking right now sorry..." And then walk out of the place with an uglier chick or be like "Oh you work at Sears? Oh that's nice..." *Get up, exits bar*. That **** would be too funny. This is a ridiculously silly and reductive comment, and oh boy, I'm soooo sorry you "only get to bone your shorty 3 times a week." No wonder guys get ignored, when they sound like you.
BubblyPopcorn Posted May 19, 2009 Posted May 19, 2009 Incompatibility/Lack of Chemistry... usually comes down to core values. She is focused on being keeping up with the Jones, and I want to have fun. Yes, "Keeping up with the Jones" and "having fun" certainly makes for two people who are incompatible when sharing core values.
Isolde Posted May 19, 2009 Posted May 19, 2009 In the first stages of dating sometimes you don't know whether it will turn out into something more serious. In other words, you don't ask yourself after the third date if you guys are compatible as marriage partners, do you? I guess it depends on age too. At my age, looking for marriage so intensely would be silly and scare guys off as well.
mr.dream merchant Posted May 19, 2009 Posted May 19, 2009 This is a ridiculously silly and reductive comment, and oh boy, I'm soooo sorry you "only get to bone your shorty 3 times a week." No wonder guys get ignored, when they sound like you. Solid rebuttal. Do you know me? Oh you don't. So how do you know how I run my game? That's right you don't. Is this post some sort of constructive input? I don't mind you disagreeing with my post but if you wanna get personal with me then you can take that **** up with Tony homeboy. And by the sound of your post, you're probably envious of that miniscule three-times-a-week boning I get to lay down on my chick. So sorry for your shortcomings in life. Maybe get out and do something about it instead of being an envious dick on a message board. Holla.
Untouchable_Fire Posted May 19, 2009 Posted May 19, 2009 Well, you've certainly made me think. The concept of creating chemistry is I guess a hard one to swallow and at the same time makes some sort of sense, still unsure as to whether I totally agree though. I mean, yeah, sure how you use your body language and so on will have an affect on how the other person reacts to you, so maybe you're right...tell you what, I'll give it a go the next time I meet someone who is 'nice' but I don't think there's much chemistry with and see if I can make the chemistry happen and report back. I know... it took me a long time to wrap my head around that. I've never had a woman try that out. So far it has always been one of my guy friends using it on someone they like. I would be very interested to see if that actually makes you feel more chemistry.
loveslife Posted May 19, 2009 Posted May 19, 2009 I know... it took me a long time to wrap my head around that. I've never had a woman try that out. So far it has always been one of my guy friends using it on someone they like. I would be very interested to see if that actually makes you feel more chemistry. There are ways to make the other person feel they're having great chemistry with you even if you feel nothing. It's a little game I used to play in my younger days. I don't have the stamina nowadays (where IS that early bird buffet??)
kizik Posted May 19, 2009 Posted May 19, 2009 Solid rebuttal. Do you know me? Oh you don't. So how do you know how I run my game? That's right you don't. Is this post some sort of constructive input? I don't mind you disagreeing with my post but if you wanna get personal with me then you can take that **** up with Tony homeboy. And by the sound of your post, you're probably envious of that miniscule three-times-a-week boning I get to lay down on my chick. So sorry for your shortcomings in life. Maybe get out and do something about it instead of being an envious dick on a message board. Holla. Getting personal? Your homeboy Tony? You want to tell on me? You're a meathead, dude. Stupid girls like guys like you. Pretty simple. Tying back to the thread, I feel bad for women if they're lowering their standards to meet guys like you. Holla!
Untouchable_Fire Posted May 19, 2009 Posted May 19, 2009 In the first stages of dating sometimes you don't know whether it will turn out into something more serious. In other words, you don't ask yourself after the third date if you guys are compatible as marriage partners, do you? I guess it depends on age too. At my age, looking for marriage so intensely would be silly and scare guys off as well. I think I know what your saying. You just don't want to talk about future plans with a guy on the first date. When I date a girl I do it with the intention of one day marrying her... even if that is 5 years down the road. If at some point I decide she is not the kind of woman I would want for a wife... I end the relationship. I think you would agree with that methodology. I would never begin dating someone that I didn't take serious. Some guys do... they will date a girl thinking, she is good enough for now. Which I believe is sick and wrong.
paddington bear Posted May 19, 2009 Posted May 19, 2009 I know... it took me a long time to wrap my head around that. I've never had a woman try that out. So far it has always been one of my guy friends using it on someone they like. I would be very interested to see if that actually makes you feel more chemistry. You do say that your guy friends used it on someone they liked what if you are the one unsure whether you like the other person, can you create chemistry in yourself, as opposed to knowing you like this other person and creating reciprocal chemistry with them? I'm asking because...date on Friday with a guy, funny, intelligent, lots to talk about, but no chemistry for me on the first date, but nevertheless going on this second date with him as I realise that with all that going for him I'd be stupid to not see if this goes somewhere.
mr.dream merchant Posted May 19, 2009 Posted May 19, 2009 Getting personal? Your homeboy Tony? You want to tell on me? You're a meathead, dude. Stupid girls like guys like you. Pretty simple. Tying back to the thread, I feel bad for women if they're lowering their standards to meet guys like you. Holla! Stupid would be not taking a chance with me. Lol. Keep it cool duke, you'll score something worth being proud of one day. Maybe you can be like me when you grow up, or leave your room, whichever comes first.
BCCA Posted May 19, 2009 Posted May 19, 2009 Guys, lets remember, winning an argument on the internet is like winning the special Olympics: even if you win, youre still retarded. There is no need for e-chest bumping, just agree to disagree.
kizik Posted May 19, 2009 Posted May 19, 2009 Guys, lets remember, winning an argument on the internet is like winning the special Olympics: even if you win, youre still retarded. There is no need for e-chest bumping, just agree to disagree. OK, ref!
loveslife Posted May 19, 2009 Posted May 19, 2009 Something this thread has made me think about, which is something I read someplace recently, is how relationships help us learn about ourselves more than anything.
BCCA Posted May 19, 2009 Posted May 19, 2009 Something this thread has made me think about, which is something I read someplace recently, is how relationships help us learn about ourselves more than anything. Thats because we learn more from failure than we ever can from victory.
stillafool Posted May 19, 2009 Posted May 19, 2009 Yes, it does create Chemistry, remember there are different types. Some women want the kind of chemistry where they feel like your the same person... like, we are so similar. How many times have you heard a woman say "we have so much in common" when talking about a guy she likes. Some women want sexual chemistry. The best way to have this is to dress great, have good hygiene, be very confident, and be very conscious of your body language. At times be somewhat sexually suggestive. Some women want fun and adventure. Some women want comfortable chemistry. Some women want the old opposites attract.... ect. See, if you think chemistry is just two people who exude matching pheromones your totally missing it. Your brain controls everything... even the release of hormones. So, you can create a physical response within someone with your words, actions, or body language. It really is the most important part. I don't know about this. I've dated guys who were over 6'1, goodlooking, immaculate dressers and hygiene, high earners, who have taken me on amazing dates and I still didn't feel anything for them. Yet I can look at a man and he can look at me and I feel something (chemistry) without even knowing his name first. I don't know, I guess a certain intensity I feel between us. So, maybe it depends on the person like you said and what their idea of chemistry is.
loveslife Posted May 19, 2009 Posted May 19, 2009 Thats because we learn more from failure than we ever can from victory. I don't think it's necessarily failure. I think it's about conflict. Not necessarily in the dire sense but in coming up against choices and decisions. It helps us define and refine who we are.
paddington bear Posted May 19, 2009 Posted May 19, 2009 Guys, lets remember, winning an argument on the internet is like winning the special Olympics: even if you win, youre still retarded. There is no need for e-chest bumping, just agree to disagree. lol!
clv0116 Posted May 19, 2009 Posted May 19, 2009 It's not warped, it's a preference, not a need. I like it when her shoulder tucks under my arm when I wrap that arm around her, and there's nothing better than a pretty face turned up into mine. I guess I'm warped also since I prefer to date women under 5' 6.
Untouchable_Fire Posted May 19, 2009 Posted May 19, 2009 There are ways to make the other person feel they're having great chemistry with you even if you feel nothing. It's a little game I used to play in my younger days. I don't have the stamina nowadays (where IS that early bird buffet??) Why would you try to make the other person feel chemistry when you don't? I try to provide advice like this to people who feel chemistry, but the other person does not. The question you need to ask yourself is this. Are you feeling nothing because you should be feeling nothing?
loveslife Posted May 19, 2009 Posted May 19, 2009 Why would you try to make the other person feel chemistry when you don't? I try to provide advice like this to people who feel chemistry, but the other person does not. The question you need to ask yourself is this. Are you feeling nothing because you should be feeling nothing? It's because when I was in my 20's I played games. It was just to prove to myself that I could. It was an ego boost. It was pathetic and the kind of thing insecure 20something girls do. Or at least I did. It stopped being fun pretty quickly though.
CommitmentPhobe Posted May 19, 2009 Posted May 19, 2009 Guys, lets remember, winning an argument on the internet is like winning the special Olympics: even if you win, youre still retarded. There is no need for e-chest bumping, just agree to disagree. Can tell you're not from the UK you would get slammed for being outrageously un-PC for that comment
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