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Posted

I don't know where to start explaining my situation...

its so insanely complicated...

 

lets just say its been a four/five year relationship

its gone thru the ringer...

cheating, spying, lying, breaking up, making up...

and now it ended with violence

 

we are currently separated

going thru therapy...(him anger management)

we keep in touch only thru IM or texts

 

the longest we have NC is three days....

and I am just feeling so confused.

 

I keep jumping from knowing that right now we are too toxic

to be together...then.. to me hating all this loneliness...

sucks that I also have almost no friends to keep me busy.

 

Last thing he tells me is that he hopes

i am making good use of this time

and for me to be aware that he is doing the same.

 

I know that a positive thing, or

I guess, it just difficult because I don't

find anything to inspire me right now...

as they used to before. I have not had any urge

to do the things/activities I love.

 

So yes.. this is a hard one...

to say we love each other...but

knowing we can't be near each other.

 

I feel so alone, thank you for reading

Posted

There is always something difficult and painful happen to everyone, but life still move on. :rolleyes:

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