Trialbyfire Posted May 17, 2009 Posted May 17, 2009 That's just it, dreamergrl, you're only looking at what they're doing v. looking at how you're reacting. Control your own reactions to ways that are beneficial to you v. worrying about what they're doing. It's like a cartoon, where Tom chases Jerry, whacks him on the head, then runs away. Jerry then chases Tom, whacks him on the head, then runs away. Back and forth and back and forth they go. Why do that? You stand still and wait. If he comes to you, you give him the green light. If he doesn't, you wander off. We teach other people how to treat us.
Author dreamergrl Posted May 17, 2009 Author Posted May 17, 2009 Well most of the time I do think he's interested. At least that's the impression he gives me. I could be over reacting. I don't know. Only time will tell I guess. Last time he just read my email and didn't respond, I got a response the next day or so. And I had over reacted. Any but ways. We'll see how things go. It's going to be weird going on this other date. I'm not going to cancel, but I'm not used to seeing more then one guy at a time.
Author dreamergrl Posted May 17, 2009 Author Posted May 17, 2009 That's just it, dreamergrl, you're only looking at what they're doing v. looking at how you're reacting. Control your own reactions to ways that are beneficial to you v. worrying about what they're doing. It's like a cartoon, where Tom chases Jerry, whacks him on the head, then runs away. Jerry then chases Tom, whacks him on the head, then runs away. Back and forth and back and forth they go. Why do that? You stand still and wait. If he comes to you, you give him the green light. If he doesn't, you wander off. We teach other people how to treat us. As normal, you're very right TBF.
xpaperxcutx Posted May 17, 2009 Posted May 17, 2009 Any but ways. We'll see how things go. It's going to be weird going on this other date. I'm not going to cancel, but I'm not used to seeing more then one guy at a time. I think it's all about a state of mind. Give the other guy a chance before you decide that multidating isn't right for you. At least then you'll know how to proceed from there whether you want to continue dating this other guy or ask D about his dating intentions.
Author dreamergrl Posted May 17, 2009 Author Posted May 17, 2009 I think it's all about a state of mind. Give the other guy a chance before you decide that multidating isn't right for you. At least then you'll know how to proceed from there whether you want to continue dating this other guy or ask D about his dating intentions. This is true. Although, if it comes down to it, I wouldn't even know what to say to D about dating intentions.
xpaperxcutx Posted May 17, 2009 Posted May 17, 2009 This is true. Although, if it comes down to it, I wouldn't even know what to say to D about dating intentions. Sorry, i only meant it as a suggestion. Just try to stay calm and don't over think things. You've got until Wednesday to decide, so just worry about doing your things.
Author dreamergrl Posted May 18, 2009 Author Posted May 18, 2009 Eh I'm feeling kind of guilty about this other date. Why??
boogieboy Posted May 18, 2009 Posted May 18, 2009 Eh I'm feeling kind of guilty about this other date. Why?? isn't it because you said before that you cant give date #2 100% because youre still thinking of the first guy?
Author dreamergrl Posted May 18, 2009 Author Posted May 18, 2009 isn't it because you said before that you cant give date #2 100% because youre still thinking of the first guy? I don't know if it's that, or I feel like I'm doing something wrong by going out with another guy. I don't know why I would be feeling that way. It wouldn't bother me if a guy was seeing a few girls when I started dating them. But yet, I can't feel okay about multiple dating.
boogieboy Posted May 18, 2009 Posted May 18, 2009 I don't know if it's that, or I feel like I'm doing something wrong by going out with another guy. I don't know why I would be feeling that way. It wouldn't bother me if a guy was seeing a few girls when I started dating them. But yet, I can't feel okay about multiple dating. its not wrong at this stage, but you did mention before that you would rather put all your effort into 1 guy. So I understand why you are uncomfortable. I think you should cut off #1 if #2 is showing more interest, that way you wont feel bad.
gopher Posted May 18, 2009 Posted May 18, 2009 You think he will? Either way I am backing off. No more contact from me until he shows interest back. Good for you Dreamer, and I'm going to follow that same tact. What's hard is when you get fun, friendly emails, good phone calls....but then you mention doing something together, and it's ignored. You would think if someone's not interested they would let it die already!!!
griffinchicken53 Posted June 8, 2009 Posted June 8, 2009 hey dreamergirl, this thread has gone cold for a few weeks now. i am curious as to any updates on your situation. and and by the way. guys aren't the only ones who play games. i know plenty of guys who are asking the same question because a girl is playing hot and cold or whatever terminology was used.
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