I definitely don't think I can handle being dumped again.

[zilverenvlinder]

I was dumped by my boyfriend of 2 years at the end of November, as some of you may recall.

 

(On Monday, he wanted to move across the country with me. On Tuesday, for no apparent reason, he never wanted to speak to me again. True story.)

 

I had about 13 or 14 suicidal wreck days, and I decided the only way to get through it was to get a new man.

 

So without giving myself any time to grieve, I slept with three different guys in the span of a week. One of them ended up liking me quite a lot, and I latched on to him faster than superglue. This was a little over two weeks after my LTR ended abruptly.

 

(But by latching onto, I don't mean I'm clingy. I follow many of The Rules.)

 

Sooo... mid-December until present we've been together. I really like him, maybe even love him, but we haven't exchanged these words yet. Not really too much future talk. (Bad sign? Or maybe just too soon...)

 

We got in a little fight last Monday, our first fight, and he's been bringing it up all week much to my annoyance. I am absolutely petrified that he's going to just abruptly break up with me like my ex did. This week more than usual, but I've been terrified the ENTIRE time we've been together.

 

To the point that, if he doesn't give me a positive response to a text or doesn't include a pet name or something of the like in a text message conversation, I start getting little panic attacks and can't think about anything else. I also have trouble breathing and feel like dying until I get a positive response.

 

I am really obsessive and I don't know if I'm obsessed with this relationship or obsessed with the fear of being dumped again. I know I'm not obsessed with him.

 

I honestly literally think every day that he's going to break up with me, even though he's never said anything ever about wanting to. I prepare myself for it. It's ridiculous and it's consuming my life. I've turned a rebound into a bout of extreme insanity.

 

I feel so much better writing this down, so I apologize for the length, but I realize there's something wrong with me and I know I need some kind of counseling.

 

I really really don't want to break up with him, I really like him, and now I can't stop thinking about that stupid fight we had and thinking that our relationship is doomed. I'm having a nervous breakdown and I need some help.

[boogieboy]

Are either of you coming to some kind of compromise about this fight?

 

I think you are panicking for the sake of panic alone. It sounds like you get yourself into a vicious cycle of building anxiety. HAve your tried breathing exercises to calm yourself down? What did you do to piss him off so much?

 

You need to work on getting your power back. If he's avoiding you, its cuz he doesnt deserve you. He cant handle whatever the problem is, and hes not mature enough to help fix it.

 

Dont panic about being dumped, being dumped just means that you will find a better person next time. Its something to look forward to if you can work on keeping the negative thoughts out of your head.