wanjirum Posted May 14, 2009 Posted May 14, 2009 My ex and I were in a long distance relationship. However during Jan we kept arguing and he called things off. After which we kept talking over the phone and I was hoping there would have been a chance once we saw each other over Easter. Luckily he ended up travelling to my country for business, in desperation and from all the stories I was hearing (from cousins and friends about other women he was messing about with). I decided to surprise him and meet him at the airport (it was a weird meeting but we finally warmed up and had a coffee. After which I he then travelled 40 minutes from my town to another town for business. Following my cousin's advice I decided to jump on a train and go meet him and talk things out, perhaps discuss what happened. But he was jet lagged and did not take the surprise too well . After which I proceeded to leave. I left him a letter and his birthday card and gift. Now I am worried my actions only pushed hi further away and reaffirmed the fact he should have been with the other girl he had been messing around with. We haven't spoken for close to 6 weeks and this is very strange because we were in an intense relationship for 2 years and we had met each others parents. To make the situation worse we talked like every single day. Now I am not sure if this new girl is a rebound, everyone tells me she is the exact opposite of me (more submissive and less independent) and he also seems to be having a fling on the side with another different girl whilst with the current girl. So does that mean he doesn't really care about the current girl he is with? What makes things worse is he met her in the club or rather has suspected her of cheating twice and has forgiven her. I am worried as time passes he will forget me and get more serious with this girl or someone else and as we are getting older, perhaps get married before I move home. Is this relationship a rebound? Does he still miss me? Should I make contact? Is there a chance for us? Currently I am trying to work on myself but I am still so torn, I still love him and miss him dearly Does he even think about me.
cabarc1 Posted May 14, 2009 Posted May 14, 2009 my ex started seeing someone 5 months after we had broken up. i was crushed and he seemed like he couldn't stand the sight of me for a couple of months. Well for 3 months i begged him back and nothing so i left him alone. He had basically moved in with that girl. Well after like 5 months, he started doing things behind her back that he shouldn't have like buy me gifts, text me here and there, come see me at work. I told him to stop all this cause it hurt me and i wanted no contact. you don't have to worry about having screwed things up, starting today, do not make any effort to contact him!! Leave him alone, u will come off pathetic if you don't and won't come back to someone who is always making theirselves available to him. I left him alone after 3 months of annoying him and 2 months after that, he was the one contacting me. So it's not too late. More than likely that girl ur ex is seeing is a rebound but she is new so he is having fun with her. She couldn't possibly be "his girl" if he is cheating on her! That's what people told me about my ex and the girl he was seeing. They said if she was "his girl" then he wouldn't be giving a crap about any other girl or his ex!! He left her after 8 months and came back but things weren't the same, too much damage had been done over the past year and we knew the right thing was to go our seperate ways and heal. If we are meant to be, it will happen. Just let ur ex go, it hurts like hell i know. I didn't eat, sleep, or want to live for months. Just work on urself for now. If he is dumb enough to be with someone who could possibly be cheating on him then they deserve each other. Hopefully u will find someone better in the meantime. Trust me, he won't forget about you. He knows where to find you and if he changes his mind one day, nothing will stop him from getting in touch with u. My ex was gone for 8 months and as great as things were going with that other girl, he never could let go of me.
Author wanjirum Posted May 19, 2009 Author Posted May 19, 2009 The only problem is this new girl seems to be playing all her cards right and seems very calculative. Is there a way I can win him back ??
lovelorcet Posted May 19, 2009 Posted May 19, 2009 You are wasting your time... If he wanted to be with you, then he would do that. Obviously he wants to be having sex with other people because that is what he is doing. No, you can not win back an EX and yes you made a clingy fool out of yourself by picking him up and following him around. Plus giving him a card and gift? for dumping you? Is this a relationship a rebound? -why do you care? Does he miss you? -most likely not very much and definitely not when he is sleeping with someone else... should you make contact? no... Is there a chance for you? not really...
webmuse Posted May 19, 2009 Posted May 19, 2009 More importantly why would you want to "win" him back.. just to "win" over the other girl?... I think you already have by getting him out of your life.
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