Relationship between educational qualifications and dating

May 13, 2009

How many of you guys would date and marry a girl who has high educational qualifications, such as postgraduate and above?

I know of at least one guy that is surrounded by many smart female friends but is going out with a beautiful girl with not high educational qualifications. I'm not saying nothing else matters but are guys put off by brains?

Girls, how high on your list are educational qualifications and career when you choose your men?

May 13, 2009

First I would look for goal orientation. As long as he's working on something or has something that he's working towards, then I have no complaints. I would expect the guy I dated to actually have finished college or is in college, because I was raised on the belief that education is very important.

I don't care if he's still working a 9 to 5 job trying to support himself, as long as he has a goal in life, then I know I wouldn't be stuck with a deadbeat who drinks beer and watch football all day.

I actually expect him to be able to carry on an intelligent conversation as well. He can stimulate my senses with fancy words all he want.

May 13, 2009

How many of you guys would date and marry a girl who has high educational qualifications, such as postgraduate and above?

I know of at least one guy that is surrounded by many smart female friends but is going out with a beautiful girl with not high educational qualifications. I'm not saying nothing else matters but are guys put off by brains?

Does it matter if someone else is put off by anything? If someone is put off or turned on by something you either have or don't have, they're not the person for you.

Girls, how high on your list are educational qualifications and career when you choose your men?

For me, an education is important. It's also important to my fiance. Both of us have postgrad degrees.

May 14, 2009

I've thought about this issue a fair bit. When I was young I always used to think that it was very important to me that a woman be highly educated, because I was. As I've gotten older (36 now), I've come to realize that it's a plus but not a major plus for me. I just recently broke up with someone who only had one year of college (she stopped going and went to work at that point). That was a disadvantage for me, but not a major one either.

So, more education is good, but it's midway down the list in importance compared to other things.

To answer your exact question, for me more education is not at all offputting. What can be offputting for me though is the amount of time a woman has available for a relationship. There is a tendency for women with high education to also work long hours in their chosen field. That is something that I personally prefer to avoid. Although I have a Masters degree in engineering I don't like to work long hours, and I prefer to date women who have reasonable amounts of free time.

When talking about someone I would marry, the situation is a little more complicated still. I do want to get married and have children. A woman who also wants children and furthermore has a desire to stay home for a while and raise them is a major plus for me. No offense to people that make different choices, but that's just what I'm looking for. It's also worth mentioning that I have always been willing if the situation arose to share those duties, even reducing to say 80% of full time hours to help do so. But, there are women out there who want to stay home full time and wouldn't have it any other way, and that is a plus for me.

It can also be tricky when both the man and the woman have high-powered degrees choosing where to live. Both are highly specialized, and in pursuit of very specific jobs. It can be challenging to get both people into good jobs that are within commuting distance of the same home.

Someone once asked me what I thought about a woman who was a medical doctor resident at a local hospital. I said offhand “if you marry a doctor you marry her degree”. Women in medical training are a particular issue because they have even less control over where and when they are sent to work at various points in their training. And, they are compelled to work insane hours. It's not that I never would date such a woman, but these kind of issues are definitely minuses rather than pluses. It's not really the degree so much as the work that it implies.

Hope it helps,

Scott

May 14, 2009

For me, an educated man is a huge turn on. My BF is. And I don't think he'd mind me speaking for him by saying he loves my brains and the number of degrees hanging on my wall, and doesn't care at all that I have one more than he does.

May 14, 2009

How many of you guys would date and marry a girl who has high educational qualifications, such as postgraduate and above?

I know of at least one guy that is surrounded by many smart female friends but is going out with a beautiful girl with not high educational qualifications. I'm not saying nothing else matters but are guys put off by brains?

Girls, how high on your list are educational qualifications and career when you choose your men?

Most people are smarter than I am. If I held that against women I'd never get laid.

May 14, 2009

How many of you guys would date and marry a girl who has high educational qualifications, such as postgraduate and above?

I know of at least one guy that is surrounded by many smart female friends but is going out with a beautiful girl with not high educational qualifications. I'm not saying nothing else matters but are guys put off by brains?

Nope.

I go after postgraduates but undergraduate is a requirement. She has to be either pursuing the degree or have completed the degrees.

There is a difference in drive, ambition, and the quality of the conversations.

May 14, 2009

**** drive and ambition. Give me a tight ass who could make pancakes.

May 14, 2009

**** drive and ambition. Give me a tight ass who could make pancakes.

I personally like creampies better. :cool:

May 14, 2009

I think you might find that the level of educational success a guy finds attractive is directly related to his. I find intelligence, and I guess therefore educational achievement a HUGE turn on. But then, I have spent years in higher learning and have had a large exposure to such women. It's not a prerequisite for me, but definitely not anything to be afraid of.

May 14, 2009

Awhile back I went out with an old classmate whom I was deeply attracted to. The fact that she was a professor only enhanced this attraction, and she was modest about it too.

Sadly, she wasn't into me as much, and I'd rather not know why. LOL

May 14, 2009

Awhile back I went out with an old classmate whom I was deeply attracted to. The fact that she was a professor only enhanced this attraction, and she was modest about it too.

Sadly, she wasn't into me as much, and I'd rather not know why. LOL

Would this be what they call " like minds attract like minds? "

It's plausible that intelligent men attract women and the same goes for the other way.

May 14, 2009

I think you might find that the level of educational success a guy finds attractive is directly related to his. I find intelligence, and I guess therefore educational achievement a HUGE turn on. But then, I have spent years in higher learning and have had a large exposure to such women. It's not a prerequisite for me, but definitely not anything to be afraid of.

No offense, but I think you sound like a complete douchebag.

First of all, anyone who considers educational achievement a huge turnon is a con artist. Because everyone knows "significant educational achievement" is a way for meek type-B personalities to hide from the real world as long as possible. I've known plenty of career students and they all fit the same bill ... all balls, no cock. All talk, no action. They chase down degree after degree, some often contradicting the last, all the while referncing what their starting salaries could have been or someday will be like it somehow excuses them for living off mommy and daddy, well into their mid 20's.

The fact of the matter is ... ambition isn't taught. It's exploited. Career students aren't exploiting their ambition, they're stunting it. ANYONE can hide away in some classroom and regurgitate elitist libgeral nonsense, most of which will never be used in any real life social or professional setting. I mean christ, we all went to high school. And unless you're going into quantum physics with a thesis on string theory, your level of commitment typically determines your level of "success". Nothing more, nothing less.

Secondly, an accumulation of degrees means nothing taken at face value. As a Director (and hiring manager) in Corporate Retail/Etail, I can tell you that I'd pay 15-20% more for 10 years of experience over 10 years of schooling. And the worst part is, the guy with 10 years of experience was paid for that time ... the guy with 10 years of school actually had to pay for that time.

Go get your Bachelors. Maybe take some relevent graduate classes online in your spare time ... but Glenn's advice to any 21 year old grad is to fight that lazy, irresponsible urge to become a career student and get some experienc eunder your belt.

May 14, 2009

No offense, but I think you sound like a complete douchebag.

First of all, anyone who considers educational achievement a huge turnon is a con artist. Because everyone knows "significant educational achievement" is a way for meek type-B personalities to hide from the real world as long as possible. I've known plenty of career students and they all fit the same bill ... all balls, no cock. All talk, no action. They chase down degree after degree, some often contradicting the last, all the while referncing what their starting salaries could have been or someday will be like it somehow excuses them for living off mommy and daddy, well into their mid 20's.

The fact of the matter is ... ambition isn't taught. It's exploited. Career students aren't exploiting their ambition, they're stunting it. ANYONE can hide away in some classroom and regurgitate elitist libgeral nonsense, most of which will never be used in any real life social or professional setting. I mean christ, we all went to high school. And unless you're going into quantum physics with a thesis on string theory, your level of commitment typically determines your level of "success". Nothing more, nothing less.

Secondly, an accumulation of degrees means nothing taken at face value. As a Director (and hiring manager) in Corporate Retail/Etail, I can tell you that I'd pay 15-20% more for 10 years of experience over 10 years of schooling. And the worst part is, the guy with 10 years of experience was paid for that time ... the guy with 10 years of school actually had to pay for that time.

Go get your Bachelors. Maybe take some relevent graduate classes online in your spare time ... but Glenn's advice to any 21 year old grad is to fight that lazy, irresponsible urge to become a career student and get some experienc eunder your belt.

Glenn I like your honesty. You're right, I've seen more than my fair of people who can study and work hard in school, but once they're out in the real world they more directionless than not.

May 14, 2009

No offense, but I think you sound like a complete douchebag.

First of all, anyone who considers educational achievement a huge turnon is a con artist. Because everyone knows "significant educational achievement" is a way for meek type-B personalities to hide from the real world as long as possible. I've known plenty of career students and they all fit the same bill ... all balls, no cock. All talk, no action. They chase down degree after degree, some often contradicting the last, all the while referncing what their starting salaries could have been or someday will be like it somehow excuses them for living off mommy and daddy, well into their mid 20's.

The fact of the matter is ... ambition isn't taught. It's exploited. Career students aren't exploiting their ambition, they're stunting it. ANYONE can hide away in some classroom and regurgitate elitist libgeral nonsense, most of which will never be used in any real life social or professional setting. I mean christ, we all went to high school. And unless you're going into quantum physics with a thesis on string theory, your level of commitment typically determines your level of "success". Nothing more, nothing less.

Secondly, an accumulation of degrees means nothing taken at face value. As a Director (and hiring manager) in Corporate Retail/Etail, I can tell you that I'd pay 15-20% more for 10 years of experience over 10 years of schooling. And the worst part is, the guy with 10 years of experience was paid for that time ... the guy with 10 years of school actually had to pay for that time.

Go get your Bachelors. Maybe take some relevent graduate classes online in your spare time ... but Glenn's advice to any 21 year old grad is to fight that lazy, irresponsible urge to become a career student and get some experienc eunder your belt.

Unfortunately, there's a lot of truth in this. I just graduated with my bachelors and had to fight the urge to go get my masters. I LOVED the college life and the only reason I would have done it at this point would be to continue this lifestyle for a few more years. Instead I left college and am starting work in a few weeks.

That doesn't necessarily make someone a douchebag, though. I'm personally looking for someone with a college degree. That's strictly a personal preference and I wouldn't necessarily rule out a woman without that. I just can't relate to my old friends back home that haven't ever had the experiences I had in college the same as other people that did.

May 14, 2009

I didn't read the whole thread, so this might have been mentioned. But you do realize that the more educated a woman is, the more likely she is to leave, right? Statistically speaking, of course.

May 14, 2009

I didn't read the whole thread, so this might have been mentioned. But you do realize that the more educated a woman is, the more likely she is to leave, right? Statistically speaking, of course.

For the Partner in the firm.

May 14, 2009

I've thought about this issue a fair bit. When I was young I always used to think that it was very important to me that a woman be highly educated, because I was. As I've gotten older (36 now), I've come to realize that it's a plus but not a major plus for me. I just recently broke up with someone who only had one year of college (she stopped going and went to work at that point). That was a disadvantage for me, but not a major one either.

So, more education is good, but it's midway down the list in importance compared to other things.

To answer your exact question, for me more education is not at all offputting. What can be offputting for me though is the amount of time a woman has available for a relationship. There is a tendency for women with high education to also work long hours in their chosen field. That is something that I personally prefer to avoid. Although I have a Masters degree in engineering I don't like to work long hours, and I prefer to date women who have reasonable amounts of free time.

When talking about someone I would marry, the situation is a little more complicated still. I do want to get married and have children. A woman who also wants children and furthermore has a desire to stay home for a while and raise them is a major plus for me. No offense to people that make different choices, but that's just what I'm looking for. It's also worth mentioning that I have always been willing if the situation arose to share those duties, even reducing to say 80% of full time hours to help do so. But, there are women out there who want to stay home full time and wouldn't have it any other way, and that is a plus for me.

It can also be tricky when both the man and the woman have high-powered degrees choosing where to live. Both are highly specialized, and in pursuit of very specific jobs. It can be challenging to get both people into good jobs that are within commuting distance of the same home.

Someone once asked me what I thought about a woman who was a medical doctor resident at a local hospital. I said offhand “if you marry a doctor you marry her degree”. Women in medical training are a particular issue because they have even less control over where and when they are sent to work at various points in their training. And, they are compelled to work insane hours. It's not that I never would date such a woman, but these kind of issues are definitely minuses rather than pluses. It's not really the degree so much as the work that it implies.

Hope it helps,

Scott

My thoughts exactly. I've dated a PhD rocket scientist (literally) and a girl with a run of the mill master's degree in a health field. Definitely happier with the latter. There is *no* strong correlation between education and emotional maturity/stability/ability to be in a relationship.

High level of education is not off-putting per se, but the lifestyle that comes with it can be - for men (obviously not for women - they'd like to have their highly educated man out of the house earning money all the time ). I work in academia, which does not bring a lot of money, but allows me to work with no pants on, from anywhere, and take long breaks at random times, and answer to no boss . Also, all of my colleague's spouses also have less education than them. Part of this is probably statistical (only 2% of the population have PhDs), and part just that they want to have normal family lives. A woman with an advanced degree and tuff ****e to deal with on her job will certainly be a pleasant companion - on the weekeneds. But on a day-to day basis she hardly feels like more than a roommate. I like traditional relationship geneder roles, so I stick with them. So the ideal happy medium is a woman with a stable job, but not of the lawyer/doctor/scientist variety.

May 14, 2009

I probably wouldn’t marry or date a highly educated woman (which to me is anything above a bachelor’s degree). I’m not put off by brains, but women generally expect and look for a man to be at least equal or better than them in most areas. IME highly educated women in particular have much higher and more demanding expectations in men than a less educated woman. I seriously doubt I would have enough to offer a woman like that. I prefer women who are a little more moderate, middle of the road and less driven (like myself). And admittedly beauty, motherly qualities, etc. are more important to me than her education level. To me, it’s more about finding someone on a similar level with similar values.

I’m pretty sure women place a much higher emphasis on a man’s education and career. Most of the time one of the first questions I get asked on dates is where I went to school and what my degree is in, which is usually followed by nods of approval.

May 14, 2009

I probably wouldn’t marry or date a highly educated woman (which to me is anything above a bachelor’s degree). I’m not put off by brains, but women generally expect and look for a man to be at least equal or better than them in most areas. IME highly educated women in particular have much higher and more demanding expectations in men than a less educated woman.

This would have been endearing if they were using that education to properly operationalise what exactly it is that they want. Instead, this is typically accompanied merely with a vague sense of wanting (deserving) ever "more".

I've found lesser educated (or more precisely - averagely educated) to be a bit more reliable in that sense: as in "he looks good, he treats me well, he has a job, I've got no reason to look elsewhere or be a bitch to him" .

Of course, entitlement can show anywhere, regardless of education, but education can certainly exacerbate the problem. Many people (men or women) expect to be handed **** just because they have a degree, and this expectation is not justified even with Ivy League degrees. Nothing but the labor market can determine how much is something worth. (Many harvard english majors adjunct teach for minimum wage).

May 14, 2009

I couldn't stand my upper-level academic courses because of the pompous students who at the grand age of 21 thought that they were smarter because they could get an A- in a Chaucer lit paper

I have a degree with honours and I am applying to grad school. My SO dropped out of airline mechanics pre-Sept.11 (he wouldn't have been able to get a job anyways!), yet he makes a very nice wage at a good government job.

Sorry, street smarts outweigh book smarts anytime. A college degree is seriously overrated.

May 14, 2009

I think you might find that the level of educational success a guy finds attractive is directly related to his./QUOTE]

Personality aside, I tend to agree.

May 14, 2009

I didn't read the whole thread, so this might have been mentioned. But you do realize that the more educated a woman is, the more likely she is to leave, right? Statistically speaking, of course.

You mean leave the relationship? Why? I have a postgrad and the reasons I left a guy have never been because of his educational qualifications.

May 14, 2009

Personally I appreciate being able to discuss certain topics/issues with my SO. His educational qualifications aren't as important as his ability to form a viewpoint on them and his keenness to keep up with current affairs.

However, I find some guys only going for girls with lesser educational background (no offense, just stating what I've observed). Sure then these guys aren't for me though it made me wonder whether they're just more insecure and find smart women intimidating.

May 14, 2009

That intellect is 'intimidating' is the biggest misconception around . Intellect and education are *always* such is a joy to be around! Provided that the intelligent person in question is mellow and pleasant to begin with, that is.

Of course, there are insecure and educated people that use their "intellect" () to stomp on others, but to be intimidated by such lowlifes insted of putting them in their place is doing a disservice to society .

The bottom line is that character trumps education in terms of importance for relationships. A person with solid character and little education is much more desireable than a person with tons of degrees and no character to speak of. I know such people in my professional circle and avoid them like the plaque. Nobody should and will be cut slack because of their degrees if they are deficient in other aspects.

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Relationship between educational qualifications and dating

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