sunsetbeach Posted May 13, 2009 Posted May 13, 2009 I am new here. I found this forum while searching online . Hopefully someone can help me. This is long sorry I am married for almost 3 years and we have a home overseas. My husband in in the military. He was deployed for over a year and came back last year. I got sick when he came back and we went to the us in aug. to get medical treatment for me. He had to go back home to work. I was not well completely and stayed here and we figured it was best since the country we were in was not very helpful with my medical issues if they would happen again. I am staying with a relative who agreed I could stay temporarily until he comes back. He was going to transfer here when they would let him. Well he is due to come home shortly. We talk lots every day. He said he was really tired last fri and wanted to go to sleep. I went out later and the debit card was declined when I tried to get some fast food. I thought omg someone has stolen our cc since it just happened a month ago. I call hubby Its about 2:30 am his time. He does not answer many calls to house and cell. I get home and I look online and see charges from the strip club where he is . As I was looking I get a call from the bank asking about these charges since they are overseas. I say well my husband is there and I know of the place so they probably are ours. I ask when they were made and she said the first one of $280.00 was at 2:00am and the second one is at 2:10am Then call my husband again and again. He finally calls me back a little after 3am. I ask what the heck is going on and he tells me that he was asleep. I say no you were not there are charges from strip club blah blah. he said call the bank and tell them it was not me . I knew it was. He says just come here I will be home soon so you dont have to worry over and over. Finally he admits it after 45 minutes when I get really angry and start to cry. He is still a little tipsy. First said guy from work called and picked him up in taxi and they went and the taxi driver just took them there for no reason. Then said he drove and picked up the guy. Then said he was drinking and the original restaurant they wanted to go to was closed and he went there. He said he realized I would be upset but he said to himself he is not doing anything but drinking. I said a lot more must be going on for a charge of 280.00 and then another of 120.00 later. There was also another 150.00 taken out of the atm earlier in the day. So over 500.00 in one day. He said they must have overcharged him when he left and I said you had to sign it. He said he only had one charge and he was scared to say anything about the overcharge because of the bouncers doing something to him. Since there were 2 charges and they were 10 minutes apart I do not believe this. You do not pay twice for drinks. I had previously heard of this club many times. All the guys and women know about it there. The girls do things like bj and handjobs for money in the back room. The amount the charge is 70.00 for 10 minutes. HMMM The first charge was for 280.00 maybe 40 minutes??? I explained this but he insists he did nothing ( no lapdance, sex acts) and did not know they even did that. He just had 4- 5 drinks. There have been a couple other instances of large withdrawls . One time he was deployed and was on break. He got to our home 3 days before me. The second day he got there he got money out at the atm for 120.00 at the atm in the strip mall of the same strip club place at around 12:30 am. That time he told me he needed an atm and that one was close by so he went there. I has asked why not the one beside the house and he said he was out driving that night and was close to that one. I did not have any proof except it was right outside the place so could not really say very much. He says he is sorry and will never lie again or go there again and he was just tipsy and not thinking even though he knows that does not excuse it. He hates that I am in so much pain. I am so heartbroken and sick . Literally throwing up for days now. We have always agreed this was not acceptable and that it was wrong. He now says I knew it was wrong but I did not realize how much but I did not do anything. Even if he did not that does not ease the pain. I was looking forward to our reunion and us moving to our new home very soon. Now I am devastated and sick and scared. I have no one to talk to except my dad and he sort of dismisses it since he has enough to worry about. The relative I stay with is gone thank goodness since I do not want her to tell the whole family.
Windy27 Posted May 13, 2009 Posted May 13, 2009 I had previously heard of this club many times. All the guys and women know about it there. The girls do things like bj and handjobs for money in the back room. The amount the charge is 70.00 for 10 minutes. HMMM The first charge was for 280.00 maybe 40 minutes??? I explained this but he insists he did nothing ( no lapdance, sex acts) and did not know they even did that. He just had 4- 5 drinks. If they charge $70 for a bj or a hand job, for what he paid, he got the full service. When he comes back, don't do anything with him, ask him to get fully tested for STD and he has to stop lying. It's not just a bj, it got to be more for that amount. He lied to you many times already (about being asleep and then just buying some drinks, comone now) and deep down, you know he went all the way with a hooker.
Enema Posted May 13, 2009 Posted May 13, 2009 Wow, he seems like a pathological liar. After that crazy string of lies I don't know if I would believe that he didn't do anything sexual. At the very least, I'm positive he got multiple lap dances. You can't spend that sort of money there on just drinks or food.
Author sunsetbeach Posted May 13, 2009 Author Posted May 13, 2009 Wow, he seems like a pathological liar. After that crazy string of lies I don't know if I would believe that he didn't do anything sexual. At the very least, I'm positive he got multiple lap dances. You can't spend that sort of money there on just drinks or food. I know the lies are bothering me just as much if not worse. I hate to be lied to. How do you ever know whats the truth anymore after this and if it has happened before? I know that there is no way drinks were that much. He said only 4 -5 drinks and they do not have food there. You would be dead before you could drink that $$$ amount of alcohol. He can handle 4-5 beers at most and he is very drunk then. Yet he keeps insisting they overcharged him and does not know why there are 2 charges 10 minutes apart.
angie2443 Posted May 13, 2009 Posted May 13, 2009 In my opinion, you're going to have make a decision. Do you want to be married to someone who will go to strip and most likely cheat on you? If you find enough in the marriage to make that acceptable, then stay. If not, then leave. I see no other options.
Spark1111 Posted May 13, 2009 Posted May 13, 2009 Call up the strip joint. Say you believe there is an error on the bill and unless they can tell you what the charges are for, you will have the bank stop payment. Call his bluff. Verify, confront, and then the hardest part....make a decision. Sorry you have to go throught this. I agree with you, the lies can erode more trust than the actions. Good luck!
Author sunsetbeach Posted May 13, 2009 Author Posted May 13, 2009 Call up the strip joint. Say you believe there is an error on the bill and unless they can tell you what the charges are for, you will have the bank stop payment. Call his bluff. Verify, confront, and then the hardest part....make a decision. Sorry you have to go throught this. I agree with you, the lies can erode more trust than the actions. Good luck! The club is where we are stationed overseas. I do not know the language well enough to communicate this. There may be someone who speaks english and I have to find the phone number somehow. Not sure if they have one for me to call. I still do not know if they would tell me. Things work a little different in this country. I do not think a stop payment threat would make them tell me. This is really killing me because I love him so much. I am literally throwing up nonstop and crying. Everything reminds me of this. The thought will maybe disappear for a few minutes then out of nowhere anything will remind me , the thoughts come back and break me down again. I gave up everything when we married. Sold all of my stuff so we could get new things, left my great job and moved overseas. I have not been able to work for 3 years because of us living there and the military really has no jobs for spouses in that location and you cannot work on the economy. Now I am in the US waiting for him to be home in a few weeks to move to our new duty place. I waited alone for him while he was deployed and months during training and when I am away he cannot wait for me. It just tears my heart. I see how someone could really die from a broken heart. It feels as if I have chest pains and squeezing in my heart most of the day like it is a slow death.
Juniper22 Posted May 13, 2009 Posted May 13, 2009 Once you give up everything for a person, you will eventually lose yourself. Love or not, never put yourself in a position to be completely dependent on another person. Getting some type of job and earning some money will be beneficial to you, more so now than ever. As far as your situation with your husband..I'm sorry this is going on. I think its wise as well to go to this club find someone who might speak some of the language and ask them about these charges. It's going to have to be up to you, on what you feel you need to do. With out any income, friends/family etc, its not going to be easy, but it CAN be done though.
Windy27 Posted May 13, 2009 Posted May 13, 2009 The club is where we are stationed overseas. I do not know the language well enough to communicate this. There may be someone who speaks english and I have to find the phone number somehow. Not sure if they have one for me to call. I still do not know if they would tell me. Things work a little different in this country. I do not think a stop payment threat would make them tell me. This is really killing me because I love him so much. I am literally throwing up nonstop and crying. Everything reminds me of this. The thought will maybe disappear for a few minutes then out of nowhere anything will remind me , the thoughts come back and break me down again. I gave up everything when we married. Sold all of my stuff so we could get new things, left my great job and moved overseas. I have not been able to work for 3 years because of us living there and the military really has no jobs for spouses in that location and you cannot work on the economy. Now I am in the US waiting for him to be home in a few weeks to move to our new duty place. I waited alone for him while he was deployed and months during training and when I am away he cannot wait for me. It just tears my heart. I see how someone could really die from a broken heart. It feels as if I have chest pains and squeezing in my heart most of the day like it is a slow death. Did you read my post above. Make sure he got two tests and I am sure he will fail at least one of them. 1) STD test (he might past or he might fail depends on whether he used protection or not). 2) Lie detector test. He need that to be allowed to come back to the marriage. Period! That way you have all the information (detail fo the acts, including any former acts, and STD status) to make an informed decision on what to do next.
taylor Posted May 13, 2009 Posted May 13, 2009 Your husband cheated on you and thinks you are stupid enough to believe his lies. All cheaters lie..they deny, deny, deny even when all the evidence points to the truth. And this is not the first time he has cheated on you. He did it again because he got away with it the first time. Who knows how many times he has cheated on you. If you hadn't stopped for fast food and if he hadn't overun the credit card, you never would have known. I think HE should be the one to contact the strip club and discuss the "overcharge." Put your phone on speaker so you can hear every word. Afterall, he is the one responsible for the overcharge on your credit card which probably resulted in a penalty charge on the card, right? Why should you "handle" that. Make him do it. And do it in front of you. I'd love to hear him explain to the strip club how he DIDN't spend $500 there and was only doing a little drinking... Do you think you can ever trust him? What consequences will he have to pay for his behavior? Why do you think your husband went outside your marriage for sex? Would you ever do the same? How's your marriage? How's your sex life? You don't have to answer these questions here. Just ask them to yourself. Sorry for your pain. Remember who caused it.
taylor Posted May 13, 2009 Posted May 13, 2009 In my opinion, you're going to have make a decision. Do you want to be married to someone who will go to strip and most likely cheat on you? If you find enough in the marriage to make that acceptable, then stay. If not, then leave. I see no other options. If you find enough in the marriage to make cheating acceptable, STAY???? What could she possibly find LEFT in a marriage with a spouse who cheats? Respect. No. Love. No. Integrity. No. Compassion. No. Understanding. No. Honesty. No Fidelity. No Loyalty. No Goodness. No What's left??? How would her husband feel if she spent $500+ at strip clubs getting fingered by naked men..or more? Would you tell him to consider staying in the marriage if he could find enough in the marriage to make the cheating acceptable? How do you think her husband would respond? Would he stay?
Mr. Lucky Posted May 13, 2009 Posted May 13, 2009 Call up the strip joint. Say you believe there is an error on the bill and unless they can tell you what the charges are for, you will have the bank stop payment. Hard to do with a debit card as, opposed to credit card, the money is already gone from your account. Since her H signed for the charges, I don't think "fraud" is a valid defense. Unlike many other BS that live with vague and unprovable half-truths and lies, the OP has the smoking gun. Up to her to figure out what she wants to do with it... Mr. Lucky
angie2443 Posted May 13, 2009 Posted May 13, 2009 How would her husband feel if she spent $500+ at strip clubs getting fingered by naked men..or more? Gosh this made me laugh! Sorry. I couldn't help it. Anyways, no, I don't think there is a point in staying in a relationship like this. This isn't what I was trying to imply. I have seen so many people here staying in relationships that I think are just crap and if people tell them to leave, they come up with more reasons to stay. I'm trying not to tell everyone on here with a cheating spouse to divorce (something I've done often in the past). I don't think it does any good. All I can do, is offer up my opinion. My opinion here, is that if she stays with this guy, she'll be cheated on over and over again.
taylor Posted May 13, 2009 Posted May 13, 2009 Gosh this made me laugh! Sorry. I couldn't help it. Made me laugh, too, Angie, reading it back. BUT, is this not what men do at strip clubs when they get handjobs and blowjobs? They pay for a naked girl to touch their genitals in a way that makes them orgasm. How would this husband feel if his wife paid $500 to have a naked man to touch her genitals so that she could have an orgasm? Really, I want to know. And I want to know how he would feel if she did this repeatedly, as well as lied about it. Would he consider this cheating on him? And how would he feel about his wife cheating? Would he listen to her excuses? Would he accept her justifications? Would he overlook her "poor judgement"? Would he feel HEARTBROKEN like the OP does? Or would he just be plain FURIOUS? Could he look at his wife with the same eyes as he did before the cheating? Or would he look at her with new eyes? Anyways, no, I don't think there is a point in staying in a relationship like this. Whew!! OK. I'll stop hyperventilating now.
travelgirl Posted May 13, 2009 Posted May 13, 2009 My husband isn't in the military but played rugby with many that did. Most of them were single at the time but those overseas asian strip clubs are NOTHING like the ones in the US. You can get anything for the right money and heard them all talking about it at after-party years ago. At the time $40 gets you a hand job, $70 gets you a BJ, $200 got you everything. This was about 6-7 years ago. I agree with another poster, have him talk to the club on 3-way about the charges and see if he will do that. There will be someone that speaks english. Those places mainly cater to overseas men. I don't think he is being truthful but I wouldn't be surprised if they did overcharge that second amount. Many of those places do because they know you can't really fight it and you have to be secretive about it. You are lucky he didn't get the date rape drug and all his money/credit cards stolen. That happens too. But even still he chose to go there, he made a decision to pay a hooker money. No amount of drinks is worth that money. Until he is truthful, I wouldn't talk to him. How many times do you think he pulled money out of an ATM and you never knew??
Author sunsetbeach Posted May 13, 2009 Author Posted May 13, 2009 Once you give up everything for a person, you will eventually lose yourself. Love or not, never put yourself in a position to be completely dependent on another person. Getting some type of job and earning some money will be beneficial to you, more so now than ever. As far as your situation with your husband..I'm sorry this is going on. I think its wise as well to go to this club find someone who might speak some of the language and ask them about these charges. It's going to have to be up to you, on what you feel you need to do. With out any income, friends/family etc, its not going to be easy, but it CAN be done though. Yes I had planned on working when he was here in a few weeks. I am better now since I had medical problems and would feel better with a job. I am in the us since last aug and he is overseas in europe. He had to go back to work and I had to stay until my medical issues resolved since the military would not let him stay here for more than a few months. This was right after he came back from deployment I got sick. So I could not go in the club unless I go back to our home over there before he came back here shortly. I have been thinking of going back to help pack up our stuff.
Author sunsetbeach Posted May 13, 2009 Author Posted May 13, 2009 Your husband cheated on you and thinks you are stupid enough to believe his lies. All cheaters lie..they deny, deny, deny even when all the evidence points to the truth. And this is not the first time he has cheated on you. He did it again because he got away with it the first time. Who knows how many times he has cheated on you. If you hadn't stopped for fast food and if he hadn't overun the credit card, you never would have known. I think HE should be the one to contact the strip club and discuss the "overcharge." Put your phone on speaker so you can hear every word. Afterall, he is the one responsible for the overcharge on your credit card which probably resulted in a penalty charge on the card, right? He did not overdraw the card but the bank blocked it because they thought it might be fraud charges. For some reason they did not realize he was in italy and thought charges from there were strange. They unblocked it after they called me. He did tell me today he will go to the bank on base and try to straighten this out tomorrow. Why should you "handle" that. Make him do it. And do it in front of you. I'd love to hear him explain to the strip club how he DIDN't spend $500 there and was only doing a little drinking... He said this is going to be embarrasing so I guess I will see if he does it and the charges go away. Do you think you can ever trust him? I have no idea does not feel like it What consequences will he have to pay for his behavior? So far its a hysterical sad wife and thats it I guess. I have mentioned MC and he said he would go but we could probably do this on our own I think it will take a MC and IC at the least the straighten this out and help me. My self esteem and trust for him has been shattered. Why do you think your husband went outside your marriage for sex? Would you ever do the same? He was deployed for 15 months then he came back and I was sick so we went to the us to get med treatment for me. He could only spend a few months together before he had to go back to work. We have been apart a long time again about 8 months now. This is the reason I am assuming this happened. Not excusable but the reason that I am sure it happened. I would not do the same even though it is lonely and hard to be apart for almost 2 years. This would be hard for most people and I am sure a lot would be tempted or would cheat but it is not acceptable. How's your marriage? How's your sex life?We always had a great sex life every day. It was amazing for us both. I am attractive and fit and he is also. We always would say this is the best sex we both ever had. The marriage has some problems. The time apart and the demands of military life cause some arguments and me to be sad and lonely. I got pregnant when he was home on deployment with a injury. He was home about 1 1/2 months to heal before he had to go back. I had a miscarriage shortly after he went back out to the middle east from stress most likely . We never really had time to grieve together about this. You don't have to answer these questions here. Just ask them to yourself. Sorry for your pain. Remember who caused it. He has kept apologizing and saying he was wrong and it will never happen again and he risked our marriage out of a stupid lapse of judgement. I dont know if he says this to pacify me or because he truly realizes the seriousness. He did say at first this was a lapse in judgement because of drinking and I told him that is no excuse. I realize what I am doing when I am drinking. The lies are killing me the most. I also told him I want him to get tested for all stds for at least a yr. Some do not show up right away. I really do not want to end my marriage but I do not want to be unhappy and always feel distrustful and worried in a marriage. It sucks the life out of you. Is there a way to rebuild trust and for him to show me he can be trusted?
Author sunsetbeach Posted May 13, 2009 Author Posted May 13, 2009 My husband isn't in the military but played rugby with many that did. Most of them were single at the time but those overseas asian strip clubs are NOTHING like the ones in the US. You can get anything for the right money and heard them all talking about it at after-party years ago. At the time $40 gets you a hand job, $70 gets you a BJ, $200 got you everything. This was about 6-7 years ago. I agree with another poster, have him talk to the club on 3-way about the charges and see if he will do that. There will be someone that speaks english. Those places mainly cater to overseas men. I don't think he is being truthful but I wouldn't be surprised if they did overcharge that second amount. Many of those places do because they know you can't really fight it and you have to be secretive about it. You are lucky he didn't get the date rape drug and all his money/credit cards stolen. That happens too. But even still he chose to go there, he made a decision to pay a hooker money. No amount of drinks is worth that money. Until he is truthful, I wouldn't talk to him. How many times do you think he pulled money out of an ATM and you never knew?? This is actually europe not asia but same thing really. The strip clubs are a lot worse than here for sure. Much prostitution sex slaves and trafficking in Europe and a lot of the women come from Romania and other places and will do a lot more than women would in the us. The strip clubs are often ran by people you do not want to upset. I do not think there is a number to call there. I cannot find it. I know there was the one time mentioned previously 120.00 was gone and it was taken out at the bank atm right outside of the club but not in the club. He said it was because he was out driving at night and needed money and that was the closest atm. There have been lots of withdrawls of 50 -75.00 which could have easily been used to go to this place or for legitimate things he needs. I have no way of knowing since he lied to me and I do not trust anymore. You are right about the date rape drug. He is very lucky. This is rampant over here. I have been warned by all sorts of people if I went out do not let my drink out of my site. They also use dangerous drugs that have mentally disabled people for life. My friend there said this happened to one of her best friends she is now in a home. She has not been right menatally since she went to a club and got a spiked drink.
taylor Posted May 14, 2009 Posted May 14, 2009 He has kept apologizing and saying he was wrong and it will never happen again and he risked our marriage out of a stupid lapse of judgement. I dont know if he says this to pacify me or because he truly realizes the seriousness. He did say at first this was a lapse in judgement because of drinking and I told him that is no excuse. I realize what I am doing when I am drinking. The lies are killing me the most. I also told him I want him to get tested for all stds for at least a yr. Some do not show up right away. I really do not want to end my marriage but I do not want to be unhappy and always feel distrustful and worried in a marriage. It sucks the life out of you. Is there a way to rebuild trust and for him to show me he can be trusted? You and your husband have been apart for long periods of time. But ask yourself these two questions: What prevents you from cheating on your husband? And What did not stop him from cheating on you? Your husband blames "poor judgement" and "alcohol" for his behavior. If you hadn't caught him, would he be beating himself up over his poor choice and that lousy alcohol? Or would he do it all over again, if he thought he could get away with it? And believe me, if your husband was "alert" enough to pull money out of an ATM, he was "alert" enough to know he was about to cheat on you..and did. Marriages are built on love, respect and trust. He has left yours in a shamble. IF you want to rebuild it, you have to set rules and he has to agree to change his behavior. You can't trust him to be faithful and you can't trust him to be honest. Trust has to be earned over a long period of time. He has to prove to you over and over again by his actions that he can maintain boundaries and that he can tell the truth. He has to be totally transparent about everything he does. Where he goes, who he sees, and what he does. I would make it a rule that clubs of all kind AND ALCOHOL are totally off limits FOREVER. This is where I would draw the line in the sand. Because obviously he can't stay faithful when he mixes the two. And he has to be totally transparent when it comes to your finances. At this point, I would make it a rule that he does not spend one dime unless you approve of it. I would never withdraw $500 from a bank account and spend it without my spouse's knowledge. Let alone spend it on something I KNOW my spouse would not approve of. Nothing like a double dose of disrespect. Your sad? If I were you, I would be furious! Sad would take a backseat to anger. And I think you should think long and hard about whether you think you will ever be able to trust this man to be honest and faithful to you. How long do you want to wonder...carry suspicions...about his behavior. If you can't trust him, what good is being married to him?
Windy27 Posted May 14, 2009 Posted May 14, 2009 He has kept apologizing and saying he was wrong and it will never happen again and he risked our marriage out of a stupid lapse of judgement. I dont know if he says this to pacify me or because he truly realizes the seriousness. He did say at first this was a lapse in judgement because of drinking and I told him that is no excuse. I realize what I am doing when I am drinking. The lies are killing me the most. I also told him I want him to get tested for all stds for at least a yr. Some do not show up right away. I really do not want to end my marriage but I do not want to be unhappy and always feel distrustful and worried in a marriage. It sucks the life out of you. Is there a way to rebuild trust and for him to show me he can be trusted? What's his response to the STD testing? Typical response like, I didn't do anything, no need? Or, was he willing?
Mimolicious Posted May 27, 2009 Posted May 27, 2009 He was probably making it rain on them H*es! (lol!) I would be more pissed about the $$ than anything else...
Author sunsetbeach Posted May 29, 2009 Author Posted May 29, 2009 What's his response to the STD testing? Typical response like, I didn't do anything, no need? Or, was he willing? He did say he does not need to but he will do it. I told him when he gets here I would want him to be tested for everything. I am still waiting for him to get home. Its taking a little longer than I thought. I think 2 more weeks. I am making myself sick everyday thinking of this. I still cry and get really angry everytime I think of it. He still has not gone to the bank. Since he said he was overcharged haha. Said he will soon . I will see if that happens. I wish I could be there but its overseas and I am in the us. The cell phones do not get reception in there. He actually said do you want me to take a lie dector test. I sad yes as a matter of fact I do. Then he was like what kind of a marriage would have that. I said well I want the truth. Then he swears everyday multiple times he did nothing except drink and he must of been charged for someone elses bills. He asked where we would get the lie det . test . I told him I would find a place to do it. Then he did mention something like you can fool the tests and sometimes they arent accurate but said he would take one . He just do not think they prove anything. I hate this. I love him but now I hate him as well. I cannot make the pain go away. I just want the truth. That is eating me up inside. He swears and insists he did nothing and my heart wants to believe to make this easier on myself but my head tells me I am a stupid fool if I believe this . I had to go to the er last week because of physical symptoms this is causing me. I did not know if I was having a freaking heart attack or not. I had trouble breathing. I would get out of breath for about 5 days straight just walking to the kitchen. Then my chest started hurting really bad and down my arms and in my upper back. They had to do a ct scan to look at lungs and ekg. Its still bothering me. I guess its stress and being upset.
badmotor Posted May 29, 2009 Posted May 29, 2009 Yes, I am a man and I dont understand those places. You have to be a pretty poor excuse of a man to have to pay for a woman's attention. He should be spending his time trying to spice things up at home and saving his money for a vacation for the two of you. Might be time to start looking elsewhere.
hopefulInFuture Posted May 29, 2009 Posted May 29, 2009 I feel for you. Being lied to is one of the worst feelings. One thing that bothers me his visit to the strip club was pre-meditated. He played the "I'm too tired and need to go to sleep" game while he knew what he was going to do. So I don't think that his mind was foggy because of the alcohol. If he were so foggy he won't have even understood how he walked into the strip club and how things happened. He pre-meditated everything and prapered a perfect lying plan... I am sorry
Author sunsetbeach Posted May 29, 2009 Author Posted May 29, 2009 Yes, I am a man and I dont understand those places. You have to be a pretty poor excuse of a man to have to pay for a woman's attention. He should be spending his time trying to spice things up at home and saving his money for a vacation for the two of you. Might be time to start looking elsewhere. Well we have been apart for most of 2 years. He was deployed 15 months then when he came back I got sick and we flew to the us. He stayed about 1 1.2 - 2months . I had to stay here for treatment and he went back overseas to his duty station our home saying he would should be able to come back in a few months but the military took a long time and its been 8 months and I have been living with a relative. So right now we have not been together in 8 months. I would think he would save that money and plan us a vacation when he gets here or something special since we could not have a proper wedding or honeymoon. Hell I did not even get a xmas anniversary or birthday present delivered here while I was sick in and out of the hospital when he went back. So it makes me angry a stripper prositute gets 500.00 dollars and I dont even get a damn card but his excuse is always I do not know what to get you that you will like. I tell him just listen in to what I say I like when I talk to you
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