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Posted

was going out with my for 4 and a half years and we broke up in march 2 months now and she text me and said "there is days when i miss you and i do think about you"?

 

is this a friendly text or is she playing with my mind?

 

i did not respond at all

Posted

I would reply and tell her if she has anything to say to you, to either call you or meet up with you and have a face to face

  • Author
Posted

i did that just there, and she said she wants to meet up for lunch this weekend.

Posted
was going out with my for 4 and a half years and we broke up in march 2 months now and she text me and said "there is days when i miss you and i do think about you"?

 

is this a friendly text or is she playing with my mind?

 

Yes, she is playing with you. She wants to keep you open as an option.

 

Remove yourself as an option.

 

 

i did not respond at all

 

keep it that way, but if she broke up with you, especially for another guy, I'd reply with something subtle....something like, "F$%& OFF!!":cool:

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Posted

there is no other guy,yes i do think im some sort of safety net or an option if things dont work out for her

 

im just going to say no to lunch and get on with my life

Posted
i did that just there, and she said she wants to meet up for lunch this weekend.

 

Meh, I think she's looking for you to fill a physical or emotional need until she finds someone else she likes better.

 

Tread carefully.

Posted
i did that just there, and she said she wants to meet up for lunch this weekend.

If you're interested in getting back together with her, you need clearer info about her intentions before you "put yourself out there" and meet for lunch.

 

I'd tell her something like this: "I'm not sure that's a good idea. I've always believed that when somebody breaks up with you, you should end contact with them. It's the only way to put it behind you and move on."

 

By saying that, you've put her on the spot, and she'll have to respond in some way.

 

If she responds like she agrees with you or understands, then you know she's just missing your companionship or something like that, and isn't looking to get back with you.

 

If she indicates that she would maybe kind of like to try again, then you should still be careful. Don't agree to lunch too wholeheartedly or enthusiastically, and don't do anything dumb like show up with flowers. And put a time limit on the lunch -- create a fake (or real) appointment for immediately afterwards so that lunch doesn't last longer than an hour, and make sure she knows about the appointment. That way you're minimizing the period of discomfort, and creating the appearance of a guy who's busy and doesn't have time to waste. That will subtly give her the impression that she has to "get on with it", not beat around the bush, and tell you what she's wanting.

 

AND, continue to be careful if you do go to lunch -- she may nonetheless be playing you, or just missing you, rather than wanting you back. Guard your heart.

Posted

She is likely telling you honestly how you feel. There would be times where after long term relationships that I bailed on that I would miss certain parts of it. I would tell them, mainly to let them know that I still cared (and certainly so they wouldn't think of me as a total bitch).

 

Regardless of why someone does this, the best thing you can do is to simply not respond. Why? Because missing someone doesn't mean they want you back. It just means they are feeling nostalgic, I guess. Or manipulative in some cases.

Posted

She is not 'playing with you'

 

After 4.5 years you dont just string someone along...

 

Cummon guys.

 

She is probably testing the waters, you need to examine yourself and see where things went wrong..

There was something that kept happening in the R that pushed her away or she had enough of. Once you know what this and are able to fix it within yourself, you will be well on your way to making up some how.

 

Find forgiveness my friend. For me it was not being able to stop dragging up the past in an argument. Subsequently, it would explode into a huge fight about the past. No point in living in the past.

Posted

If you love this girl, dont give up.

Look at the storys on this site. I got to page 211 of the 2nd chance forums before i finaly realised the ones who worked things out properly were honest with each other, kept in touch throughout the breakup and searched deep inside for the answers as to what went wrong :)

Posted
If you love this girl, dont give up.

Look at the storys on this site. I got to page 211 of the 2nd chance forums before i finaly realised the ones who worked things out properly were honest with each other, kept in touch throughout the breakup and searched deep inside for the answers as to what went wrong :)

 

spot on. save the bitterness and negativity for old age when you start having cats in the house.

 

even if it doesn't work out, once you had an LTR with someone (and they didn't cheat on you or beat your or anything), that person deserves some slack, no?

Posted

The easiest way to find out what someone wants, is to ask outright.

 

"What do you want from me?"

 

Btw, who broke up with whom?

  • Author
Posted

she broke up with me,she said she wasnt happy in the relationship and she is confused.

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