Wrenikle Posted May 11, 2009 Posted May 11, 2009 Hello all, this is my first post at loveshack, I found this sight by typing "how do I profess my love?" into ask.com. I will explain why I typed this later. Anyhow let me give you the skinny. I am 37 years old. My girl is 28 years old. We are both drug addicts, crack, heroin. We are both clean right now, me because I am sick of it and finally got out of the middle of "crack alley" in the hood. Her because of a warrant for impersonation and possesion. Heh this gets good folks, from an outsiders point of view. I originally met B(anonymity ya know) while drinking beer one night in the hood. B was ummm.....a working girl. When I saw her I immediatly couldn't stop staring, and I don't have lose morals, been with 3 women in my life, her being one of em. So she noticed me stepping on my tongue and approached me. "Hey, you smoke?", she asked. "Hell yeah!!!", I babbled. "Well I gotta twenty....." she tempted. Needless to say folks that was almost a year ago. Long and short of it B used my place to come smoke and get away from the street, I always treated her like another human being, numerous times she spent the night with no strings attached. I simply am not like that. Fast forward to christmas time. I was at work and received a call from B. She was acting all friendly and flirty, i'm like WTF does she want. I had developed a bad taste for her after too many nights of her running in and out of my apartment getting twenty bucks every two hours. So I blew her off. Next day she calls and I am in a better mood, she explained to me that she just got out of jail and was released to a halfway house, which she got kicked out of for shooting. She told me she was staying a block away. She wanted to get together with me. SHe said I was the only one on the avenue that treated her with dignity, never asked for anything. Now let me tell you, this woman has been using for only a few years and has not been living the average hooker lifestyle. I say this that way because she still has her looks, and most of her mind | This was xmas eve. I was attracted to this girl, just not her lifestyle, when I heard she wasn't trying to pursue the lifestyle I was hooked. Told her the potential to squish my heart like a bug was real, she said I had the same potential. We went out for a month, lived in a 20x20 room....shared a bathroom with other boarders in the building. Basically the landlord didnt like her, we never had any space and we fell apart. She moved back down the block. I lost my job. I got evicted. Yet she still continued. And I was distraught. Stalking her. Longing to make it right. She was out of reach. At first I did what I could. Give her what little money and crack I could steal or hustle. And then we went to fleetwood mac.......wow we were still in love. Two months ago. So finally I lost my place.....moved to the suburbs with family. One month ago I heard from a friend that B was in jail and wanted to send me a message that she was locked up. I immediatly relayed to her that I would prepay my cell phone to accept jail calls. Two days later she calls......OMG!!!!!!!! I remember this vividly. "I treated you so bad, you didn't deserve any of it, you deserve so much more, and i'm so sorry." she genuinly spoke. I was in the car with two friends with a crack pipe. I immediatly started balling and told her I needed her but I wasn't going to ball with these dudes in the car. SHe understood, but later I found out she thought I was faking, but the female who relayed the message to me from jail told her that basically I was desperatly in love with her. So for the past month we have been talking everyday. I haven't heard someone tell me they love me as much as she has in my life. And marriage is on the table. She realizes i've always had respect for her, and would put myself infront of a knife for her, because I did when she was getting attacked by another hooker. I would die for her........ And I don't know after typing this why I posted. I answer my own question. If we both stay sober this is destined to work. God has put me in her path for a reason. I truly feel as if B is my soulmate. She is the ying to my yang........If she isn't around I don't want to be..........plain and simple Thanks for listening folks........feel free to post........I know right now my perceptions a little skewed to say the least..........have a great night!!!!! Shawn
tami-chan Posted May 11, 2009 Posted May 11, 2009 :lmao:! Are you for real? I am asking this sincerely...
Windy27 Posted May 11, 2009 Posted May 11, 2009 So, who's the Other Man and who's the Other Woman? Are you still on drugs?
bentnotbroken Posted May 11, 2009 Posted May 11, 2009 That distinct smell is in the air again....nothing like o' de troll in the morning.
Author Wrenikle Posted May 11, 2009 Author Posted May 11, 2009 :lmao:! Are you for real? I am asking this sincerely... Yes, every bit of my post is true.......I only spoke of two people in the post........B(my girl) and me(well me)........I know this is an interesting story........Love is great huhZ????? Shawn
whichwayisup Posted May 11, 2009 Posted May 11, 2009 Honestly, I think you need to distance yourself from her. Get out of that scene - It reeks of trouble.
Windy27 Posted May 11, 2009 Posted May 11, 2009 :lmao:! Are you for real? I am asking this sincerely... Why can't it be for real? Have you cheated with a married man?
GorillaTheater Posted May 11, 2009 Posted May 11, 2009 I think you definitely WERE on the path to destruction, and at this point it may not take much to nudge you back on that path. Like a freshly-sober person from your heroin/crack past who's proably still struggling with her own addiction issues. My advice is to make a clean cut from all facets of your past and build your life (and sobriety) back to a point where you're on solid ground before thinking about getting back together with her, knowing that it might take a few years.
Author Wrenikle Posted May 11, 2009 Author Posted May 11, 2009 No one way this is real. Douche bag.........it's as real as the disappointment I have for your lips on my ass.......what kind of enjoymeny would I get out of posting something like that if it wasn't real........and sorry to everyone else about getting publically bent at this twit.........
Author Wrenikle Posted May 11, 2009 Author Posted May 11, 2009 I think you definitely WERE on the path to destruction, and at this point it may not take much to nudge you back on that path. Like a freshly-sober person from your heroin/crack past who's proably still struggling with her own addiction issues. My advice is to make a clean cut from all facets of your past and build your life (and sobriety) back to a point where you're on solid ground before thinking about getting back together with her, knowing that it might take a few years. Wow, I can't even perceive that......The thing is we want to do this together....hopefully God will see fit to honor our free will......
GorillaTheater Posted May 11, 2009 Posted May 11, 2009 Douche bag.........it's as real as the disappointment I have for your lips on my ass.......what kind of enjoymeny would I get out of posting something like that if it wasn't real........and sorry to everyone else about getting publically bent at this twit......... Take it easy. This place gets some troll traffic. Don't take it personally if someone's radar goes off.
Author Wrenikle Posted May 11, 2009 Author Posted May 11, 2009 Why can't it be for real? Have you cheated with a married man? Was this comment posted for me? LoL....nope never cheated with a married man......and umm I wasn't married but a few years ago another girl I was seeing was..........don't wanna get into that one.......keep posting everyone.......thanks except dwi71........douche
GorillaTheater Posted May 11, 2009 Posted May 11, 2009 Wow, I can't even perceive that......The thing is we want to do this together....hopefully God will see fit to honor our free will...... You'll do what you want to do, but if you value your sobriety at least do it with your eyes wide open and understand the risk involved.
bentnotbroken Posted May 11, 2009 Posted May 11, 2009 Was this comment posted for me? LoL....nope never cheated with a married man......and umm I wasn't married but a few years ago another girl I was seeing was..........don't wanna get into that one.......keep posting everyone.......thanks except dwi71........douche This wasn't directed at you. It was directed at Tami. You need to chill if you want someone to try to help you.
Author Wrenikle Posted May 11, 2009 Author Posted May 11, 2009 You'll do what you want to do, but if you value your sobriety at least do it with your eyes wide open and understand the risk involved. Yes I definetly life with the risks everyday........thanks
Author Wrenikle Posted May 11, 2009 Author Posted May 11, 2009 This wasn't directed at you. It was directed at Tami. You need to chill if you want someone to try to help you. Chillin out as I type......sorry for offendin yas......
Author Wrenikle Posted May 11, 2009 Author Posted May 11, 2009 Take it easy. This place gets some troll traffic. Don't take it personally if someone's radar goes off. ummmm forgive my ignorance.........whats troll traffic?
GorillaTheater Posted May 11, 2009 Posted May 11, 2009 Trolls: folks who craft a fake post in such a way to get a strong reaction from other posters. Anger is good. Shock is better. Generating a fight among regular posters is the best.
wildsoul Posted May 11, 2009 Posted May 11, 2009 Was this comment posted for me? LoL....nope never cheated with a married man......and umm I wasn't married but a few years ago another girl I was seeing was..........don't wanna get into that one.......keep posting everyone.......thanks except dwi71........douche The reason people are asking you if you were/are cheating is because you posted in a section of LS (LoveShack) that has the intended use of: "The Other Man / Woman The other side of the story: Support and discussion for those who find themselves involved with a committed partner." So if this isn't a triangulated relationship, you inadvertantly posted in the wrong section. You might get better responses by going to the home page, then a romantic section such as "dating" or "second chances." Although it might be fair to say that your relationship IS triangulated, with drugs being the awful third party. Either of you might cheat on the relationship by going back to drugs. In many ways, your story is parallel to affairs: uncertainty of whether your partner will choose the relationship with you or go back to the previous relationship, in this case addiction. It sounds painful. You have to want your sobriety more than ANYTHING in this whole world, including your girlfriend. Although it logically makes sense, it seldom works out that a couple recovers together. Typically, one or both of them keep slipping and dragging the other one down. I've seen that. It's sad. Are you doing a 12-step program like Narcotics Anonymous NA? If so, there's another program called Recovering Couples Anonymous RCA that exists to help couples sort thru recovery issues while in a relationship. Good luck to you.
JMC Posted May 11, 2009 Posted May 11, 2009 LOL OP if I were you I'd feel safer in a back alley than this place....sad huh.
GorillaTheater Posted May 11, 2009 Posted May 11, 2009 LOL OP if I were you I'd feel safer in a back alley than this place....sad huh. You know, I see comments like this from time to time, but I don't get it. This place is no rougher than real life. At least my life. And in alot of ways is actually more gentle.
joybean72 Posted May 11, 2009 Posted May 11, 2009 Think you need to post this in the Addiction & Recovery Forum. Why are you posting in here?
tami-chan Posted May 12, 2009 Posted May 12, 2009 Why can't it be for real? Have you cheated with a married man? LOL...huh? why is this about me? you are strange...a little too interested in me...... let me be-you will be fine without me...really, I promise you that.
Windy27 Posted May 12, 2009 Posted May 12, 2009 LOL...huh? why is this about me? you are strange...a little too interested in me...... let me be-you will be fine without me...really, I promise you that. By refusing to answer, you've already answered the question. Shame on you!
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