Juno Posted May 6, 2009 Posted May 6, 2009 Ugh....bad day today. Money issue, tax issue...in tears. As if I don't have enough going, I think about my ex. I've been fine for the past two weeks since I confronted him on the status of our on again/off again relationship. He ended up saying he didn't want to "lead", so with that I said, "Ok". Haven't contacted/spoken to him since. I know I did this in part because I knew I didn't want to continue with our physical relationship if we weren't on the same page. Even though I force him to make the call, I still feel I made the call by bringing up the topic knowing full well how he would respond since he is not the type of person to initiate on his own. So, why today of all days do I want him back so badly. I have so much to deal with, yet he is at the forefront of all my thoughts. It seems every time I have a personal crisis to deal with, my longing for him resurfaces with a vengence. It's not like he has ever been there for me before to help we deal with my issues, so I can't be missing him for support. I don't get this...I don't get me. In my last thread, a poster identified my ex as an emotional unavailable personality, which I looked up and totally agree with. I can't seem to shake him no matter how hard I try. I want him more when I'm not with him, than I do when I'm with him. Meaning, when we spend time together it's just OK....doesn't give me any overwhelming emotional high/or intense satisfaction, but apart I can bearly function throughout the day. Seems bad events triggers this longing for him. Anyone experience this...can anyone relate and advise? Thanks
trying123 Posted May 7, 2009 Posted May 7, 2009 I will apologize first but I am becoming more blunt the older I become Don't worry your normal. Everyone wants that comfort and that shoulder to cry on. Being single is hard. When your life goes down, your confidence goes down and you question your decision. Super normal, but honestly that is the easy way out. Your dependent on the comfort that you took from that relationship. I am guilty of it too. I know I am being hard but I wish I had this advice before me and my ex went through 4 break ups over 5 years. I know its tough, but you will reach a point when you realize that you don't need anyone and that you can do it all on your own. This not a date you can set, but you can feel it, you will honestly never be more proud of yourself than at that moment and realize that of course you deserved better from your ex and you don't NEED him.
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