ctx2 Posted May 6, 2009 Posted May 6, 2009 First off, let me say that I am a 31 year old, succesful female. I have my education and career and I have been divorced for nearly 7 years. Yes, I got married at a young age after we got pregnant, but I also divorced at a young age when he wasn't man enough to be a father. I've done everything on my own and i've literally had 2 - 3 boyfriends in the last 7 years because I have been so busy with priorities. My last relationship was over 2 years ago and ended drama-free...we weren't compatible. I've found it difficult to meet guys. They always have more baggage then I care to involve my self with and there's really slim picking where i'm from. I met this guy 2 months ago and that has changed things. I'll admit that I feel weird about our age difference (he's only 25), but rather than that, we get along great. We went on a couple of dates before I let him kiss me and after 5 or 6 weeks of steady dates, we slept together. He's met my daughter and we seem to be getting closer. My question and insecurity is could a guy that great really be interested in someone older with their own baggage? I mean, my ex husband can still be a little freaky, a child is a huge responsibility, and I am completely out of touch with how things work nowadays....especially when he's that much younger. Example: We watched movies together Saturday and Sunday. Mondays are back to work for us both and I text him Monday night a message stating how I wished he could stay the night....(no, I haven't let him because of my daughter) and he said that would have to be planned (joking with me cuz I can't plan anything). We text yesterday morning, but that's the last i've heard from him. I guess I get insecure because I have been divorced and I don't know the rules of the "game" anymore. Any advice or thoughts? PS - I've met the Best Friend and he we got along great, so I know I got the approval. Oh, and he was very sweet to my daughter, but they have only met twice and i'd like to keep it very casual until I know where we are going and yes, once I was referred to as the girlfriend and no, we didn't talk about it....it was what he referred to me as. Thoughts?
burning 4 revenge Posted May 6, 2009 Posted May 6, 2009 Youre 31 and youre older Good grief I dated a woman 6 years older for a long time and it felt we were the same age, because we basically were the same age When I was 22 I dated someone who was 42 briefly.. That felt like a legitimate age gap relationship, but I wouldnt say this is one Im sure most everyone will say the same thing
bean1 Posted May 6, 2009 Posted May 6, 2009 It really depends on the guy. My SO's friend got married, at 25, to a woman who was 31 and had an 8 year old son from a previous relationship. Now, they have 2 more children together and are happy as clams. Genuine men will still be interested in you BUT you need to take the time to make sure of this. It would probably be more difficult than a woman without kids or was younger, but don't automatically think that you are knocked down a few pegs before you start!!!
Author ctx2 Posted May 6, 2009 Author Posted May 6, 2009 Yeah, I feel like he's pretty genuine. It's my own insecurities I gotta work through. But, rule of thumb on phone calls: R there still rules when it comes to this and where the *beep* do texts fall into all of this?
burning 4 revenge Posted May 6, 2009 Posted May 6, 2009 When you say your ex-husband is freaky what do you mean? Do you think he'll try and hurt your new bf?
Lizzie60 Posted May 6, 2009 Posted May 6, 2009 OMG.. You got to be kidding.. you're almost the same age... 6 years is NOTHING! Enjoy
burning 4 revenge Posted May 6, 2009 Posted May 6, 2009 OMG.. You got to be kidding.. you're almost the same age... 6 years is NOTHING! Enjoy I thought that too, but she says she has a crazy ex-husband That may be more of an issue
Author ctx2 Posted May 6, 2009 Author Posted May 6, 2009 Yeah, my ex is not the sanest. He didn't really intefere with my last relationships, but he will call out of the blue professing his love and will interrogate our daughter and such. We're also going through a modification of his visitation because he has gotten into a lot of criminal trouble (DWI's and theft) and I don't trust him with our daughter alone. Currently, he has to be supervised when he has our daughter and cannot drive with her. His parents are the supervisors. He hasn't done anything yet, but he will bother me before he bothers the new guy.
Lizzie60 Posted May 6, 2009 Posted May 6, 2009 Yabutt the crazy husband has nothing to do with this.. If he's crazy.. then it doesn't matter if it's this guy or any other guy .. he'll be crazy just the same... so then she would need to take care of the ex.. (report him to police).
burning 4 revenge Posted May 6, 2009 Posted May 6, 2009 Yeah, my ex is not the sanest. He didn't really intefere with my last relationships, but he will call out of the blue professing his love and will interrogate our daughter and such. We're also going through a modification of his visitation because he has gotten into a lot of criminal trouble (DWI's and theft) and I don't trust him with our daughter alone. Currently, he has to be supervised when he has our daughter and cannot drive with her. His parents are the supervisors. He hasn't done anything yet, but he will bother me before he bothers the new guy. Have you ever seen In The Bedroom
Author ctx2 Posted May 6, 2009 Author Posted May 6, 2009 Yes. What an awful thought, but I understand why you bring it up. A younger guy could make the ex a little more crazy. What about my other questions about texting/calls?
Recommended Posts