La de Longe Posted May 4, 2009 Posted May 4, 2009 Right now I’m trying to cope with losing a guy I cared deeply about to another girl. For over two years I was absolutely in love with a guy I barely even knew. About eight months ago he started pursuing me really intensely. It was obvious that we both really liked each other, but despite wanting a relationship with him very badly, I was too afraid to really show him how I felt and he moved on to a girl that was pursuing him and now completely ignores me. I feel awful because I keep on thinking how this opportunity basically fell in my lap and I threw it away. I’m 21 and have never had a boyfriend so maybe I’m just clinging to this because I’ve never felt as strongly about someone as I did him and fear that I never will again. Also, I know how difficult relationships are for me (hence being 21 and never dating) and I feel like this was my chance to finally get everything I wanted and I ****ed it all up. Logically, I know that I’m young and have tons of life ahead of me, but right now I all feel is regret. I’m also thinking of sending him an email basically explaining how much I regret not making my feelings clear. I’m not asking him to take me back, but rather letting him know where I’m at and how I feel about the situation, because I know that if I don’t get some closure I’m going to obsess about this indefinitely. I feel like I’m making way too big of a deal out of this so can anyone help me put this back into perspective?
GoneButNotForgotten Posted May 4, 2009 Posted May 4, 2009 Take this as a lesson. Everyone slips and lets opportunities pass them bye. It happens, but if you learn from it then there is at least one less mistake to make in the future. You don't know if it would have even worked out between you two. Despite what your mind and movies tell you, relationships don't always work out and very few ever have the fairy tale story behind them. Take it for what it was, a missed opportunity and something to not do again. Life takes us down odd paths at times, but the journey is where life really is, not the destination.
PookFollower Posted May 4, 2009 Posted May 4, 2009 I’m also thinking of sending him an email basically explaining how much I regret not making my feelings clear. I’m not asking him to take me back, but rather letting him know where I’m at and how I feel about the situation, because I know that if I don’t get some closure I’m going to obsess about this indefinitely. Good idea.
Perrier Posted May 4, 2009 Posted May 4, 2009 He is already with someone else which you know too. I would chalk it up to an opportunity lost and leave it. Sorry if its not what you wanted to hear
Author La de Longe Posted May 5, 2009 Author Posted May 5, 2009 I'm open to hearing anything since I need a perspective other than my own. I'm definitely trying to move forward and learn from this experience since I have to take something good away from it. I'm still debating whether or not I should send him the email though. The thing is I know he really liked me and I feel like I just want to tell him that his efforts weren't in vain. That I really did care for him even if I seemed indifferent. I think he also knew that I liked him back, but felt like things were going no where between us. In some respects I think I want to apologize. I just feel like I need to get all of this out of me if I'm ever going to move on while another part of my says "leave it alone." Can anyone else give me a reason why this would be a good/bad idea?
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